EPL Page 23 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Have Manchester City <i>Really</i> Wrapped Up The Premier League Title Already?
Is this real life? We thought it was something last year when Chelsea became champions-elect by the start of November, but sweet Jesus, we’re only four games into the new season and it already looks nearly certain that Manchester City will lift the Premier League trophy come May....
Little Kid's Mind Blown Upon Realizing He's Standing Next To Wayne Rooney
“Doot-da-doo, just waiting to go out on the pitch with Ashley Williams. Man, this is pretty cool. Oops, ref coming through I better get out of the—wait a minute... is that... HOLY SCHNIKES!!!!” Here’s a Vine of lil dude’s happiest moment in life:...
West Ham Fans Keep Getting Victory Tattoos
West Ham beat Liverpool 3-0 today, which means Leicester City remain in the top four. It also means that fan Jon High has a new tattoo. What follows is a story in two tweets about bold predictions, keeping your word, and how cool Manuel Lanzini’s name is....
Chelsea Shit The Bed Against Crystal Palace
For just the second time in 100 games under José Mourinho, Chelsea have lost at Stamford Bridge. We are just four weeks into the EPL season yet Chelsea already trail Manchester City by eight points after today’s 2-1 defeat to Crystal Palace. ...
Callum Wilson Overhead Kick Gives Bournemouth Lead On Leicester City
We noted here that AFC Bournemouth had the potential to be one of the Premiership’s most exciting clubs this season, and the Cherries haven’t let us down—with Callum Wilson’s acrobatic overhead kick putting his side up 1-0 in the first half today against Leicester City....
Are Everton Really Dumb Enough To Turn Down Tons Of Money For John Stones?
John Stones is a promising English center back currently playing for Everton, who’s pretty good and has every chance to get better. His talent, youth, potential, position, and Englishness all make him a very hot and very valuable commodity. (Word to Raheem Sterling.) But apparently out of some misgu...
Manchester United Still Don't Realize They're Not Manchester United Anymore
It’s kind of cute, if in a sad sort of way. Manchester United, once the biggest name in the game, chasing after superstars in the press like a giddy child racing after lightning bugs in the night, hoping to nab one or two like the big clubs can but knowing deep down that it won’t actually happen....
These Two Petr Čech Saves Are The Best Saves
Arsenal are hosting Liverpool today in the Premier League, and through one half, the Gunners look like complete and utter bullcrap against the visitors. It’s remarkable how many players in Arsenal’s starting XI appear to be betting against their team on the same day. And yet—and yet!— it’s still sco...
Reluctant Mascot Is Reluctant
We don’t blame you, kid. Nobody wants to shake a referee’s hand. ...
Manchester City Stake Their Claim As The Premier League's Best Team
You wouldn’t exactly describe it as a shock. It was Manchester City, after all. Winners of two of the last four Premier League titles; armed with the best goalscorers in the country; with one of its twistiest, most creative talents; newly infused with the precocious abilities of England’s most promi...
Mario Balotelli Does Lots Of Dumb Things, So Liverpool Want No Part Of Him
Liverpool have pretty obviously been trying to offload the mercurial and misfiring Mario Balotelli for months now. And while we haven’t yet seen the kind of public outbursts we’re used to when Balo has previously overstayed his welcome, the Independent has a rundown of previously unreported incident...
Here's José Mourinho's Bullshit Excuse For Why He Demoted His Team Doctor
Earlier this week, José Mourinho demoted Chelsea’s long-serving team doctor, days after he publicly showed her up during a game last weekend. He’s rightly come in for criticism for the decision, so now “sources close” to him have concocted an excuse for the change: the players didn’t feel comfortabl...
José Mourinho Demotes Team Doctor After Blowing Up Her Spot On Pitch
Eva Carneiro, the long-serving Chelsea first team doctor, has been a staple of the team’s matches over the years, rushing out onto the pitch as the first responder to any and all of their injuries. It’s very likely that one such attempt to treat a player on the field last weekend will be her last, h...
West Ham Fan Keeps Word, Gets Ass Tattoo To Commemorate Win Over Arsenal
Arsenal, this year’s sexy pick to Do Some Things in England’s Premier League this year, kicked off their campaign yesterday at home against West Ham. What follows is a story in two tweets:...
Liverpool Beat Stoke Thanks To Lightning Strike From Coutinho
Philippe Coutinho’s rocket from outside the box proved to be the deciding goal in today’s 1-0 Liverpool win over Stoke, and is more likely than not to hold up as the Premiership’s golazo of the opening week....
Leicester City Player Calls Man "Jap" At Casino, Apologizes
Leicester City are at it again. Striker Jamie Vardy was caught on camera at a Leicester casino On July 26th repeatedly calling a man “jap” because he thought he was looking over his shoulder at his cards. He has since apologized for the incident, but the club are investigating. Vardy started and sco...
Jose Mourinho Is In Midseason Form As Chelsea Barely Survive Swansea
Chelsea opened their Premier League title defense today with a topsy turvy 2-2 draw against Swansea City. As you can see, Jose Mourinho ain’t too happy about it. Our staff of amateur lip readers concurs that he’s dropping a “Fuck off Michael!”—directed towards referee Michael Oliver—but you could ma...
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The First Goal Of The Premier League Season Is ... An Own Goal
Here it is, the day we’ve all been waiting for: the return of the EPL. Manchester United-Tottenham is our opener, and though Spurs started brightly, all their good work was undone thanks to a terrible pass by Nabil Bentaleb. It wasn’t the prettiest season-christening goal, but we’ll take it....
The Best Of The Best: Our 2015-16 Premier League Preview, Pt. 3
You’ve made it to the third and final installment of our Premier League preview, and what lies below is a rundown of what we at Deadspin consider the six (6) least bad teams in all of England’s top flight. This thirdish of the league is important because this is where teams are fighting for all-impo...