eric Page 253 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Wait, Let's Clown These Scrub-Ass Doofuses Some More
Seventeen days. That’s how much stamina flinty-eyed deal master Donald Trump, sober policy knower Paul Ryan, and all the Republican Party had for a health care overhaul they’d been promising for seven years, before the work of negotiating amongst themselves overwhelmed them and they retired to their...

Lil' J.J. Barea Got Ejected For Taking Down Blake Griffin
In the Mavericks’ 97-95 win over the Los Angeles Clippers tonight, Mavs point guard J.J. Barea, listed at 6-foot-nothing, 185 pounds, tussled briefly with the Clippers’ Blake Griffin, a hefty 6-foot-10, 251 pounds. Despite the mismatch, Barea got his hands in Griffin’s face, pushed him to the ground...

Team USA Wants To Inspire Baseball Kids To Be Boring Fun-Haters
Ahead of Team USA’s World Baseball Classic final against Puerto Rico tonight, some American baseball men said some eye-rolling shit. Team USA’s second baseman Ian Kinsler told the New York Times he hoped the team could inspire the youth to Play The Right Way and grow up to be fun-hating baseball men...

The Phoenix Suns Are Here For The Tank Party
After getting a look at the, uh, effort the Lakers are putting into making sure they hang onto their first-round pick in the upcoming NBA draft, the Phoenix Suns have decided to get in on that action....

Team USA Smacks Two Eighth-Inning Dongs To Beat Venezuela
Team USA hit two late homers to beat Venezuela 4-2 in pool play at the World Baseball Classic....

Oh Yeah, This Is The Good Stuff
You want some fuckin class war? This is the shit, right here. ...

Dirk Nowitzki Forever
Mavericks legend Dirk Nowitzki came into tonight’s game against the Lakers just 20 points short of 30,000 career points. Only five other players have ever scored 30,000 (Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Karl Malone, Kobe Bryant, Michael Jordan, and Wilt Chamberlain), and Dirk went and joined them as soon as he ...

The Future Of Feature Writing Is Woof Woof Bark Aww
If you’re a regular reader of feature journalism on the internet, you have encountered what we at Deadspin sometimes refer to as the “Snow Fall” treatment, after the famous New York Times story that launched the phenomenon. This is when a publisher packages a (typically lengthy) feature story with f...

The American Cup Was A Competition In Search Of A Story
Back in 2013, the American Cup marked the senior debut of Simone Biles. Though she didn’t win the meet—the title went to Katelyn Ohashi, who had been a junior superstar—it was evident that Biles was about to become a force in U.S. women’s gymnastics. Even if no one watching could’ve predicted just h...

American Cup Interrupted By Injury To Dutch Groin
Bart Deurloo of the Netherlands had a painful interruption to his pommel horse routine at today’s American Cup—coming down hard on the corner of the horse, groin-first. ...

U.S. Soccer Youngster Wallops In The Goal Of A Lifetime
The United States’ U-20 team is taking on El Salvador for a spot in the U-20 World Cup tonight, and they’ll be through to the tournament if they do anything besides lose by multiple goals. If they win or draw, they’ll play Honduras for the CONCACAF U-20 championship. ...

This Horrendous Atlanta United Fan Chant Is The Nadir Of American "Football" Cosplay
If you haven’t yet grasped why American soccer’s penchant for ripping off European fan culture without any of the history or tradition from which the real culture emerged is so embarrassing—think MLS team names like Sporting KC and D.C. United, or incidents like New York Red Bulls “ultras” tossing g...
![Education Secretary DeVos: [Sound Of Me Spitting Out Coffee, Falling Out Of Chair]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/uitlf1tpu0tvsgmckaof.jpg)
Education Secretary DeVos: [Sound Of Me Spitting Out Coffee, Falling Out Of Chair]
Historically black colleges and universities (HBCUs) are “real pioneers when it comes to school choice,” according to a statement by Education Secretary Betsy DeVos. Also, I’m going to pull my head off and punt it into a bog....

Trump Makes Thirsty Business Asshole Tell Flattering Golf Story
Here’s Day-Glo leatherette Cialis tote Donald Trump, in a meeting with various manufacturing executive types, prodding General Electric CEO Jeffrey Immelt to tell the story of the time Trump boasted about being a rich person who plays golf (probably true) and then hit a hole-in-one on his own golf c...

Philadelphia 76ers Trade Nerlens Noel To Dallas
The Dallas Mavericks have acquired 76ers big man Nerlens Noel, reports Adrian Wojnarowski. In return, Dallas will send Philadelphia Andrew Bogut, Justin Anderson, and a top 1-18 protected 2017 first-round draft pick. ...

The Kids Are All Red
Last weekend, as Donald Trump prepared to rally in Florida, Barack Obama laid low after his vacation with Richard Branson, and Hillary Clinton took in some Broadway shows, 250 young leftists from across the country crowded into a Brooklyn church to learn how to spread the good word about socialism....

Sprinter Loses Shoe During Race, Wins Anyway
American University’s Liam Purdy won the Patriot League 800-meter indoor title on Sunday, and he did it despite losing his dang shoe partway through the race....

Science: CEOs Are Such Bullshit
“CEO” is a term for someone who is paid more money than you because they are able to project a large degree of confidence about their wrong ideas. Don’t take my word for it—it’s science!...

Trump Called A Press Conference Because The Tweets Weren't Working
Here is a ... well, here is something:...

Bad Fan Hocks Loogie Straight Into Face Of Soccer Player
This video of some typically crude and unsporting behavior in Argentina is queued up to begin where the real action starts, but if you’d like a little backstory, you can skip back to the beginning. On the other hand, if you just want to see a dude spit in a player’s face, just hit play and let it ri...