eve Page 311 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lance Allred Is Not The Smiling Face Of Polygamy
Cleveland Cavaliers bench player Lance Allred was raised on a polygamist compound until the age of 13, and since, you know, that’s been in the news lately, CBS “The Early Show” interviewed him about it this morning. We wouldn’t say it went well....
Sparring With Carl Everett
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel, and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th ) awf...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while exercising ... • 7 p.m. — Womens Final Four: Connecticut vs. Stanford; LSU vs. Tennessee. It's going to be UConn-Tennessee again, so why bother? [ESPN] • 8 p.m. — MLB: Chicago White Sox at Detroit Tigers. Save some run support for the rest of the team, Brandon Inge. You wouldn't ...
TV Listings (With Proper Timestampery)
Quite exciting, this web log magic. For once the TV listings will show up on the correct date, unless of course I'm merely being preemptively presumptuous and the TV listings for today appear sometime next Thursday on Jalopnik. So let's see where the time-o-meter takes us, so in the meantime, please...
Steve Lyons Would Like To See Your Breasts, Please
Here's an odd little story, featuring current Dodgers broadcaster Steve Lyons and a big-bosomed lady named Stacey Roy. From a court document filed on March 9, Stephen J. Lyons v. Fire Insurance, suggests that this is just a messy little money squabble between an ex-athlete and his homeowners insuran...
Moises Alou's Timing Leaves Much To Be Desired
As has been well documented, if Moises Alou, back in 2003, just slowly jogs away from the left-field wall, no one ever knows who Steve Bartman is, and people can go back to blaming Alex Gonzalez or Mark Prior or whomever they want to blame. (You know, people who actually played.) A few years ago, Al...
Your AL Central "Preview"
All right, well, the season has supposedly started, though rain on Opening Day has to be some sort of cruel trick from God. So let's wrap up the last division....
Cuban Says Pros Before Joes, Brah
Mark Cuban let loose a expectedly jaundiced reaction to David Stern's mandate to allow bloggers into the Maverick's locker room, choosing the preferred broad brush of bloggers as the snarking "internet equivalent of Talk Soup or VH1's 'Best ..... ' series." It's problematic that he frames the separ...
China Has Addressed Our Pooping Needs
Breaking news in the Beijing Olympics controversy: They're fixing the toilets. I've prayed for this day (dabs at eye with hankie). It makes sense. The Chinese government realized that if it wants the Olympics to run efficiently, then it needs to address this pressing issue. Simply put, American athl...
The Glory Of The Knicks Vs. The Heat
A friend of ours attended the Knicks-Heat game last night — the Knicks won 103-99 in overtime — and emailed us, alarmed; it appeared he had been transported to something quite different than an NBA game....
Media Approval Ratings: Steve Phillips
It's not often you hear ESPN's Steve Phillips in the broadcast booth for a game, but hey, it's tough to turn down a trip to Japan. We think the days of the fake press conferences are over, but Steve Phillips remains, undaunted....
NCAA Pants Party: Georgetown Vs. Maryland-Baltimore County
Georgetown Hoyas (27-5) vs. Maryland-Baltimore County Retrievers When: Friday, 2:45 Where: Raleigh, N.C....
About Last Night
What you missed while fleeing random monkey violence ... • NBA: Celtics win on St. Patrick's Day. This would be significant if any of their players were Irish. • MLB: Mr. Baseball ... Matsuzaka to start for Red Sox in Japan opener. • NHL: Wild beat Avalanche to climb into first. Thank you for watchi...
Maryland Baltimore County Retrievers
1. Retriever Fever. Every March, we are presented with a mid-major that you can't help but root for. This year, that team is the UMBC Retrievers. You have the fantastic nickname of "Retrievers." Then, you have the hyphenated university name, which unfortunately sounds like a school that you find adv...
Steve Spurrier Enjoys Oats, Hay, Mounting Mares
For years, SEC opponents have been referring to South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier as a horse's ass. Now, once and for all, he is a horse. And he might just make the Kentucky Derby....
Go From A 16 Seed To A No Seed
MVN Outsider points to a snippy (tee hee) promotion that ensures that if, you know, you're a fella who wants an excuse to watch the entire NCAA Tournament and also is interested in rendering himself sterile, you needn't wait until after the tourney....
Derek Anderson Leaves Browns For Free Agency, Signs With Browns
I'm picturing the scene from Meet The Parents where a dejected Ben Stiller stands in an empty terminal and must wait his turn to board the airplane, thanks to the by-the-book airline employee who has yet to call his row. "Please step aside, sir."...
LeBron Is Human After All
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who isn't going to cover the Blazers/Clippers game, because of the pain it caused my eyes to watch. (Although I will tell you that Portland won 82-80.) When he isn't recovering from the ugliness of professional basketball, he can be found making fun of it at...
Klitschko Wins An Easy Decision Over Ibragimov
It wasn't an exciting fight and it certainly won't propel him into the big money, but Wladimir Klitschko won a unanimous decision over Sultan Ibragimov. I had the fight scored as a 12 round shutout, but the judges were a bit more kind to the Russian....