ew Page 2563 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

When Cops Are Trying To Accost Opposing Basketball Players In The Middle Of A Game, You Know Something Crazy Went Down
Last night's St. John's-Notre Dame bout at The Bra was an easy win for the 24th-ranked Irish, but it came at a cost: a Senior Night scuffle between ND's Cameron Biedscheid and SJU swingman Sir'Dominic Pointer resulted in both being ejected for fighting and a mandatory one-game suspension. That's bi...

Here Is Every Known Gruesome Angle Of Marc Staal Taking A Slapshot In The Eye Tonight
I'm old enough to remember a few dudes in the NHL who played without a helmet. Dinosaurs of an earlier age like Brad Marsh and Greg Smyth Craig MacTavish were grandfathered in, showing what was left of their mullets and their intelligence while substituting machismo for brains (or the prospect of ...

Read Joe Paterno's Disapproving Letter To A Player Who "Cheated" Penn State Out Of $12.99
A 1982 letter from Joe Paterno to one of his former players first popped up on CBS Sports last Thursday, and it also appeared on former NFL player Dustin Fox's Instagram account. In the letter, Paterno takes the player to task for not paying $12.99 in hotel service charges that he racked up while t...

The Public-Funding-For-Stadiums Hustle Comes To Spring Training
Every day, it seems, another team in another sport is begging local government to pay for its stupid stadium upgrades—luxury boxes, video boards, home-run whirligigs. And seemingly every other day, more or less, municipalities give into the bullying....

This Year, Iditarod Mushers Will Be Peeing Themselves Mid-Race With The Help Of Science
The Iditarod kicked off over the weekend, and it'll be more than a week before even the best mushers complete the race. That 1000-mile trek through the Alaskan wilds is tough enough, even without having to take bathroom breaks at rest-stop Hardees or pee off the back of your sled, giggling as the st...

In Canada, Beware Of Flying Footballs To The Face During Footwork Drills
Taylor Renaud, a former wide receiver for Nova Scotia's Acadia University, is here to teach us this valuable lesson. Renaud was working out with his roommate, Mike Benson, the long-snapper for the CFL's Edmonton Eskimos and another former Acadia player. Benson was supposed to throw the ball to Ren...

Jay Gruden On What Andy Dalton Needs To Improve: "Everything"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: The Bengals OC says there's always room for improvement....

Spring Training Long And Boring, Baseball Players Report
Baseball! It's the perfect sport for a laid-back afternoon, but it can drag. After what seems like an eternity of game after game, inning after inning, baking under the hot sun and trying not to get injured, you finally power through the dog days and arrive at the games that really matter: opening d...

Manchester United Eliminated From Champions League Due To Ridiculous Red Card
Real Madrid recovered from a one-goal disadvantage to score a road win at Old Trafford and win the UEFA Champions League knockout round tie with Manchester United thanks to an absurd red card....

Kirk Gibson And Dusty Baker Are Already Feuding Like Schoolgirls
We're still more than three weeks from the start of the MLB regular season, but that completely nonexistent heated rivalry between the Diamondbacks and the Reds is already starting to simmer. Yesterday, before their Cactus League cage match, managers Kirk Gibson and Dusty Baker met at home plate to ...

Here's More Proof That Larry Sanders Is The NBA's Best Interior Defender
One of the best things to come out of this year's Sloan Sports Analytics Conference was Kirk Goldsberry's paper on interior defense, in which he details which defenders are the best and worst at lowering opponent field goal percentage on shots at the rim. Surprisingly, the paper pointed to little-...

This Is What Happens When Newspaper Design Tries To Get Creative
Via Reddit and Bryan Armen Graham, the front of the C section of today's Mankato (Minn.) Free Press. That doesn't even look like a "G."...

Oregon State Has New Uniforms, And One Fearsome Beaver
New uniforms! Nothing is more exciting than the first chance to purchase see new college uniforms, especially when they're the result of a two-year Nike overhaul for that "other" Oregon school. Oregon State unveiled the new look last night, so let's dive in....
!["Absolutely Brazen" Woman Steals Two Police Cars In Two Cities In Two States [Updated With Photo And Video]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18gknmk5qe9zmjpg.jpg)
"Absolutely Brazen" Woman Steals Two Police Cars In Two Cities In Two States [Updated With Photo And Video]
Florida? Ohio? Wrong! This one happened in both New Jersey and Pennsylvania, and in the neighboring cities of Camden and Philadelphia. It began with a cop in Camden making a routine traffic stop for a vehicle violation just before 10 a.m., only to have his unattended cruiser stolen by a man and a wo...

Fox Sports 1, The ESPN "Alternative," Starts In August, And Regis Philbin Is Involved
"Fans are ready for an alternative to the establishment," reads the press release announcing the Aug. 17 launch of Fox Sports 1. That's how big ESPN is: In the sports world, Rupert Murdoch is considered the scrappy alternative....

Bank-Shot Buzzer-Beater Wins Championship
St. Andrew's School (R.I.) led by two and was 3.3 seconds away from winning the New England Preparatory School Athletic Council (NEPSAC) Class AA title against Cushing Academy (Mass.) on Sunday. But Cushing sophomore Jalen Adams took the inbounds pass, dribbled a few steps across halfcourt, and la...

Red Sox Pitcher Clocked At 111 MPH (While Driving Drunk)
That would be Sidd Finch territory, if it was the speed of his fastball and not the speed of his pickup truck....

Bigoted Israeli Soccer Fans Walk Out After Muslim Player Scores For Their Team
Beitar Jersualem, one of Israel's most popular soccer teams, added two non-Israeli players to its roster this year. Zaur Sadayev and Dzhabrail Kadiyev are both Chechan Muslims and are two of the five non-Israeli players to have ever suited up for Beitar throughout the team's existence. Unsurprising...

Claude Julien Complained About The Canadiens' "Embellishment," So Someone Made This Highlight Reel Of Bruins Dives
After a chippy loss to Montreal on Monday, Bruins coach Claude Julien came out firing in his postgame press conference, accusing the Canadiens of diving and flopping all over the place. Some of his comments:...

Sanity: The Panthers Aren't Getting Taxpayer Money To Renovate Their 17-Year-Old Stadium
It's an inescapable conclusion at this point, but the NFL doesn't want a team in Los Angeles. A big empty lot, with the potential for a new stadium and team, is far more valuable to the league and the owners as a threat than as an actual franchise. As teams attempt to wring taxpayer money out of the...