explained-lists Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Potential Super Bowl Outcomes, Ranked
1. Chiefs over Rams...
Warmths, Ranked
When it’s winter and cold outside and, say, your office is an uninsulated block of freezing concrete, you and your colleagues might spend a lot of time haggling over space heaters, thinking about warmth. There are many different warmths; here they are, ranked from best to worst....
<i>A Christmas Story</i> Subplots, Ranked
Christmas feels incomplete without at least four-to-six partial viewings of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark’s 1983 movie based on Jean Shepherd’s semi-autobiographical stories. By now, if you have a heart, you’ve seen each segment and running subplot dozens of times. But which are the best? And which a...
Grinch Burns, Ranked
1. Your soul is an appalling dump heap, overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled-up knots....
Holidays, Ranked
Here is a list of (commercialized) U.S. holidays, ranked in order of how good they are:...
Looney Tunes Characters, Ranked
Who would do this? And why? Drew Magary would, was the thing, and was gonna, and I’d rather die than let his rankings speak for the site and wind up with history recording that the place where I work said “R&B/Soul” was the second-best Looney Tunes character of all time. So we turned it into a scien...
Dirks Nowitzki, Ranked
Alex Kennedy of HoopsHype has posted some excellent videos that track the evolution of specific player avatars in NBA video games over the last two decades. By far the most cursed sequence is Dirk Nowitzki’s. If you were expecting a steady, linear progression from “Not Dirk” to “Okay that’s Dirk” as...
Announcing Cliches In Soccer, Ranked
The World Cup didn’t quite feel the same without Ian Darke to call it, but at least there was another month of (mostly) British announcers populating our soccer broadcasts. Here’s a celebration of the phrases only heard when watching the beautiful game....
GIFs, Ranked
Today is my last day at Deadspin after seven years of forcing you to watch dumb shit I saw on TV. To commemorate my departure, I went through all 5,128 animated GIFs I created during my tenure here to select, and rank, the best of them....
Times Of Day For Fireworks, Ranked
Some folks outside my apartment were shooting off fireworks around noon today. Why would you waste them like that? I’m not sure, but this is when you should set off fireworks....
Potential 2018 NBA Finals Outcomes, Ranked
1. Cavaliers def. Warriors...
My Enemies In Nature, Ranked
It’s more or less springlike now, pending yet another cruel and absurd outbreak of The Eternal Winter of 2017-18. Here in my absurd forest dwelling, spring means that we are emerging, pallid and blinking, to plant new trees and azaleas, to try with ludicrous and doomed vanity to restore some mowable...
Various Trader Joe’s Foodstuffs, Ranked<em></em>
(NOTE: Beer and wine not included.)...
Sports Start Times, Ranked
Here are the best times for tipoffs, kickoffs, first pitches, and whatever they do in soccer:...
<i>It's A Wonderful Life</i> Characters, Ranked
1. Mary Bailey...
U2 Albums, Ranked
U2 has a new album out, apparently....
Shitty Male Apologies From This News Cycle, Ranked
Deadspin ranks things—cereals, planets, board games—fairly often. It’s our house style to file these rankings to “Underexplained Lists” and then to live up to that descriptor: there’s no point to explaining the list, because the process is secondary. The list is the point. The stupid list, with all ...
95 Theses, Ranked
It is the 500th anniversary of the Reformation. Martin Luther’s 95 theses, ranked:...
