f Page 1834 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Two-time Big Ten Offensive Player of the Year Braxton Miller told The Columbus Dispatch that he will return to play for Ohio State in the 2015-16 season. After going down last season with a preseason shoulder injury, Miller was succeeded by J.T. Barrett and Cardale Jones—who he will battle this pres...
Ray McDonald Charged With False Imprisonment, Domestic Violence (Update)
Santa Clara County prosecutors announced today that they have charged Ray McDonald with felony false imprisonment, misdemeanor domestic violence, child endangerment, and violating a court order that he stay away from the victim. If convicted, the Santa Clara District Attorney’s office says the forme...
A Different Kind Of Party At The Women's World Cup
In May I was at a bar in Portland, Ore., with two of my brothers, watching the U.S. women’s national soccer team play the first of a series of pre-World Cup tune-ups. At first, we were the only people there—it was Mother’s Day, around brunchtime. A little after halftime, an older couple sat down at ...
Who Has The Best Super-Dick At Comic Con?
The 2015 Comic Con floor is open, which means hundreds of thousands of fans will soon be filing in to talk with comic creators, buy sweet commissioned drawings at Artist’s Alley, and, of course, check out some statues of superheroes wearing skintight costumes that show off their dick bulges. Deadspi...
Joe Theismann Joined Fox News To Talk "Redskins." It Went Poorly.
There are certain moments in life in which a person or group of people say something so dumb, that no matter how wrong or stupid it may be, you can’t look away. Today, Fox News provided us with one of those moments. ...
Bill Murray On Cardinals Fans: "Satan's Messengers On Earth"
Famous vagrant Bill Murray played golf in the John Deere Classic Pro-Am at TPC Deere Run in Silvis, Ill. Wednesday, and had fun with fans as he traversed the course. Murray, a well-known Chicago Cubs fan, took as many shots as he could at the St. Louis Cardinals along the way....
MLS Will Ride The USWNT's Coattails By Having Floats In Victory Parade
If the TV ratings for the USWNT’s obliteration of Japan in the 2015 Women’s World Cup final—it was the most-watched soccer game in U.S. history—stood for anything, it’s that Americans will support the sporting greatness of our own unreservedly. Unfortunately, the vultures in charge of the inferior s...
Man Tries To Consume As Many Calories As Tour De France Rider, Barfs
Clearly, the approximate 8,000 daily calories consumed by a Tour de France rider are spread out, not eaten in one sitting, but that’s not the point of Nicolay Ramm’s stunt. He’s just doing this until he pukes, and that’s totally fine....
All White Everything: The Glorious Badness Of <i>Enter The Ninja </i>
Ninjas tend to wear all black because they want to move around in the dark without being seen, right? Like, that’s the whole point of being a ninja? I’m asking this because the hero of 1981’s Enter the Ninja is a white ninja, in both senses of the word: He’s a Caucasian man who’s become a ninja, and...
![Mark Cuban Calls ESPN Dipshit Chris Broussard's Reporting "Ridiculous" [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1333104085409666407.png)
Mark Cuban Calls ESPN Dipshit Chris Broussard's Reporting "Ridiculous" [Update]
One of the more hilarious things to come out of the DeAndre Jordan Hostage Crisis of 2015 was the work of always-wrong ESPN doofus/bigot Chris Broussard, a grossly stupid man and bad reporter....
FIFA Bans Chuck Blazer For Life
Chuck Blazer—the former FIFA exco member and CONCACAF general secretary who proved that Americans can be just as venal as any other soccer executive, but whose cooperation with the feds helped lead to May’s arrests and indictments—has been banned for life, effective immediately....
It Was A Crazy Night, But DeAndre Jordan Re-Signed With The Clippers
One of the most bizarre free agencies in NBA history is set to draw to a close, and the ending is definitely the weirdest part about it....
Report: Jason Pierre-Paul Had His Right Index Finger Amputated
Schrödinger’s firework-mangled defensive lineman has come to an apparent resolution, at least as far as the immediate severity of the injuries. ESPN’s Adam Schefter has tweeted out what he says is a medical chart showing that Jason Pierre-Paul had his right index finger amputated today, after suffer...
Here Are Some Athletes You Should Bone Instead Of Cristiano Ronaldo
The consensus view is that Portuguese soccer mega-star Cristiano Ronaldo, currently being a weird brand robot in Japan, is not just a good-looking and sexy athlete, but perhaps the best-looking, the sexiest male athlete. But nah. His facial features are too small, his eyebrows too sculpted, his chin...
The DeAndre Jordan Standoff Will Be Won With Emoji
DeAndre Jordan’s having second thoughts about where he wants to sign, so now the Mavericks and Clippers are standing at either side of him, clapping and telling him to walk to them. Dallas thought it had an agreement with Jordan, but now the Clippers are making a desperate second effort. The Maveric...
What's Going On With Jason Pierre-Paul?
We still have absolutely no idea if Jason Pierre-Paul will be ready to start the season, or if he had his blown-up hand awkwardly replaced by a tiny doll hand. The Giants don’t seem to know either, oddly: after three unsuccessful days trying to visit their DE in a Miami hospital, they’ve returned to...
Report: The Clippers Are Trying To Win Back DeAndre Jordan
Apparently convinced that their offseason wasn’t already embarrassing enough, the Clippers are now trying to convince DeAndre Jordan, who has already agreed to sign with the Mavericks, to go back on his deal with Dallas before it becomes official and stay in L.A. Or so says ESPN’s Marc Stein:...
Cristiano Ronaldo Has A Great Time Getting Felt Up On Japanese TV
They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Apparently the aphorism applies a little differently to cyborgs. New evidence shows that a finger or five on Cristiano Ronaldo’s laser-cut abs turns him into a giggling schoolborg who will love you forever....
Rory McIlroy Will Miss The British Open
That ankle injury that Rory McIlroy suffered while playing soccer will indeed keep the golfer out of this year’s British Open. McIlroy announced that he’ll be missing the tournament with a sad Instagram post:...