f Page 1854 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bear To Leaves: "Come Here, Stupid Leaves"
Sometimes life is a fucker and tries to deny you the things you want. Things like financial security, a good metabolism, or, in the case of this moon bear, some tasty leaves. Don’t let life do you like that. Get the leaves....
Jason Whitlock Out As Head Of The Undefeated
ESPN has removed Jason Whitlock from the website it created especially for him, according to ESPN PR man Richard Sandomir. A weasely press release quickly followed:...
Note To Jay Mariotti: <i>Ray Donovan</i> Premieres On July 12
This is an urgent message for Jay Mariotti. Jay, please read this....
Shawn Marion's Ready To Go Whenever, Coach
Shawn Marion’s on the Cleveland Cavaliers. This might be news to anyone watching the playoffs, since the 37-year-old has logged 25 total minutes in the postseason, none of those coming in the Finals. Since the Cavs’ depth is so shallow, a new Brian Windhorst report asks, why not Marion?...
This Crazy-Ass New Beer Proves That India Pale Ale Will Never Die
Are you one of the weirdoes, poseurs, or stout-humpers who claims to be tired of India pale ale? If so, congratulations on being cool and condolences on being screwed, because IPAs are never going away. According to data released yesterday by Brewbound, America’s most popular craft-beer category sti...
America's 800-Meter Savior Has Finally Arrived
Prepare to brag, women’s 800 meter fans. Talk some smack with your Kenyan and Russian friends, because this is the year the U.S. women’s dynasty begins for real. You won’t get hung out to dry like those other times, I swear—we got people who are going to back you up, namely Ajee Wilson who will be k...
Mike Francesa And Caller Have Wonderful Conversation About LeBron's Dick
Today, Mike Francesa and regular caller Mike in Montclair talked about LeBron cutting his head on a camera and, in a separate event, showing his dick. Since the usual outline of Francesa’s show is “Mike Francesa’s coworkers and callers explain sports to Mike and get his reactions,” Mike in Montclair...
John Carpenter's <i>Assault On Precinct 13 </i>Is Ice Cold And Just Right
John Carpenter’s original Assault on Precinct 13 is one of the greatest zombie movies of all time, and there’s not a single zombie in it. The elements are all there: The chilling synth score, a cast of randoms thrown together by chance, an isolated siege site, the narrow escapes and eerie moments be...
Who Was Andre Iguodala Trolling Last Night?
Andre Iguodala played a hell of a game last night, scoring 22 points as a key component of the Warriors’ deadly small-ball unit. He also sprinkled some not-so-subtle trolling into his performance late in the third quarter....
Please Stop Yelling At Timofey Mozgov, You Mean Old Man
If you weren’t already convinced that longtime NBA referee and albino rage-turtle Joey Crawford is the worst, please watch the clip above....
What Last Year's Spurs Taught The Warriors About Beating LeBron
The Warriors “unstoppable” small lineup is rightly getting credit for luring Cleveland into the faster-paced shootout Golden State always wanted to play. But who gets credit for starting Andre Iguodala for Andrew Bogut? Steve Kerr is willing to give it all to a 28-year-old he calls his “chief of sta...
Are The Warriors Just Too Deep For The Cavs? (Probably)
Even before Kyrie Irving was injured, the Cavaliers bench more closely resembled a basketball old folks home than something that could actually help a team in 2015. Kendrick Perkins? Brendan Haywood? Shawn Marion? Mike Miller? I’m not even sure who Joe Harris is....
Cleveland Weatherman Might Just Be Losing It, You Guys
Fresh off his bizarre antics a few days ago, WEWS chief meteorologist Mark Johnson turned his Cavaliers fandom up another notch on tonight’s late local news, as the ABC station’s weatherman brought a weed-whacker and a concrete block onto the set with him in reaction to tonight’s Cleveland loss. ...
Watch "Nature Boy" Ric Flair Attempt To Pump Up The Cleveland Crowd
On a day when we mourn the death of one of Ric Flair’s biggest rivals, the “Nature Boy” himself took the court during a first-half time out to try and pump up the crowd at Cleveland’s arena. He still has it... some of it. “WOOO!” ...
LeBron Cracks Head Open, Stays In Game
Despite falling into a camera and busting his head open, LeBron James managed to stay in tonight’s game. James’s head clearly sported some lacerations, but apparently owing to NBA rules he had no choice but to remain in the game and shoot his free throws....
Hey, Look: It's LeBron's Dick! (NSFW, Probably)
It sure appears ABC caught LeBron James making an adjustment just before tipoff of tonight’s Game 4:...
LeBron Has Been A Damned Statistical Marvel In The Finals
There’s a way to look at Steph Curry’s stat line as an artifact of not just box score accounting, but his style. If you look closely, there are traces of the visceral experience of watching Steph double axel around a screen and fire up a three from the hip in arcane statistical whimsy, like fast bre...
Dingy Goon Matthew Dellawhatever Is Giving Up Coffee Before Games
After being hospitalized for dehydration when Game 3 ended, War Boy with hair Matthew Dellavedova says he’ll skip his usual tradition of having coffee before a game and during halftime, because he thinks it might be affecting his on-court performance....
Here's Our Favorite New Low-Alcohol Beer
Earlier this week, an employee of Colorado’s Caution Brewing Company threw his job to the wind via an angry and profane letter to Evil Twin Brewing in which he chastised the Brooklyn-based contract brewer for their high prices. Evil Twin posted the letter on their Facebook page, prompting Caution’s ...
The Colts Have Some Extremely Sad Banners
The Indianapolis Colts have a new banner in their stadium, one that reads “2014 AFC Finalist.” Hey, ummm, the Colts? “AFC finalist” is not a real thing........