football Page 118 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Doug Marrone And Jalen Ramsey Are Already Screaming At Each Other On The Sideline
Jacksonville hasn’t exactly started out on the best foot this season, what with their starting quarterback breaking his clavicle and allowing Sammy Watkins score three touchdowns last Sunday, but it’s still early enough in the year where things like that shouldn’t be wearing people down. Yet, less t...
Titans' Home Debut Features On-Field Fireball
The Tennessee Titans just kicked off their first home game of the season, and attempted to wow the home fans with a pregame pyrotechnic display. It didn’t go very well!...
Antonio Brown Will Play Today
According to ESPN’s Adam Schefter, Antonio Brown will play for the Patriots in today’s game against the Miami Dolphins....
Iowa State Found The Assiest Way To Lose El Assico
Iowa and Iowa State met last night and participated in the annual tradition of putting on the most consistently terrible rivalry game in college football. Last night’s edition of the clash truly lived up to its El Assico nickname, in no small part because of how Iowa State managed to finally lose it...
What's Wrong With Cam Newton?
It’s time to start worrying about Cam Newton. If that wasn’t clear before the Panthers’ 20-14 home loss last night to the Buccaneers, it’s obvious now. The only question is whether Newton is injured or washed. ...
Let's Move The 49ers, Again
I am not among those of my era who are amazed that the Rolling Stones are still touring energetically at carbon-dateable age, but I know I am in the minority here, and I recognize power when I see it. So when the Stones condemned their recent experience playing the 49ers’ stadium, the implication wa...
Gregg Williams Gradually Turns Into Giant Pile Of Salt When Asked About Odell Beckham Jr.
Former bounty program architect and general sourpuss Gregg Williams was asked Friday about recent comments from Browns receiver Odell Beckham Jr., accusing Williams of instructing his players to hurt Beckham during a game in 2017, when Beckham was with the Giants and Williams was with the Browns. Wi...
Jameis Winston Still Doesn't Quite Have This Pep-Talk Thing Nailed Down
No matter what becomes of the rest of Jameis Winston’s career, I think it is safe to say that the first thing he will be remembered for is the multiple accusations of sexual assault that have been made against him. But the second thing—well, that’s the crab legs. But the third thing he will be remem...
Minkah Fitzpatrick Wants Out Of Miami
It took only one game for the depth and breadth of Miami’s “tank for Tua” campaign to become apparent, and it was being widely reported even before all the players had finished driving home from the stadium that they were frantically ringing their agents, begging for deliverance from whatever this a...
Interminable Mike Pereira Rules Monologue Interrupted Several Times By Ghastly Football
The NFL’s got to clean this crap up. The Thursday night game between the Panthers and Buccaneers was already a hellish, dismal slog, featuring punchless, amateurish offense run by a pair of deeply disinterested quarterbacks. Then the fourth quarter rolled around, and what might’ve otherwise been at ...
Washington's Running Back Conflict Resolves Itself In Characteristically Grim, Destructive Fashion
Washington running back Derrius Guice missed his entire rookie season after suffering a knee injury during his first career preseason game. This year, Guice injured his other knee in his first career regular season game, and is expected to miss only half the year. If he keeps this pattern up, the th...
Someone Wanted A Johnny Manziel Jersey Bad Enough To Steal One From A Museum
The Texas A&M campus police asked for help Thursday afternoon identifying a “person of interest” in the theft of the uniform of NFL bust and CFL flameout Johnny Manziel, last seen having a cup of coffee with the now defunct Alliance of American Football. The uniform was reportedly stolen from A&M’s ...
Odell Beckham Jr. Says Gregg Williams Told His Players To Hurt Beckham In A Preseason Game
The Browns are getting ready to play the Jets on Monday night, which means that they will be facing off against their former defensive coordinator, Gregg Williams. Even though Browns receiver Odell Beckham Jr. didn’t overlap with Williams in Cleveland, he has his own history with the Jets’ new defen...
Should A Home Run Automatically End An Inning?
I will not keep you waiting for an answer on this one. No, absolutely not and under no circumstances would it be a good idea for a homer to automatically end an inning in a big league baseball game. It seems important not to equivocate on this question. And yet this Funbag question, from a listener ...
Rolling Stones, San Francisco 49ers, City Of Santa Clara All Extremely Mad At Each Other
The Mercury News has published a surprisingly entertaining story about a three-way spat currently raging between the Rolling Stones, the San Francisco 49ers, and the city of Santa Clara. The fight is over various logistical headaches that come with trying to put on a concert at the Niners’ stadium, ...
The NFL Has A Painkiller Crisis That It Never Wants To Go Away
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
Jets Quarterback Sam Darnold Could Be Out Several Weeks With Mono
Because nothing can ever go right for the Jets, Sam Darnold has mono. Darnold, the man Jets fans are relying on to become a franchise-defining quarterback, has apparently been very busy smooching lately, and as a result has contracted the disease you probably haven’t thought about since that one tim...
The Cowboys Look Fun As Hell
Right, right, right: It came against a crummy opponent whose ineptitude no doubt made things far easier than they had to be, and it was only Week 1. But in terms of personnel, play design, and execution, the Cowboys on Sunday showed they’re capable of being as forward-thinking and efficient as any o...
Donald Trump: We Love Bill Belichick, Don't We, And Also Curing AIDS?
There are two versions of President Donald Trump that appear in public. They both inhabit the same body—the same Youppi-shaped torso pitched forward at the same implausible angles, same ghost-pale eyelids fluttering alarmingly, same resplendent candyfloss Kangol of hair stuck on top of it like a wei...
The First Game Of The Rest Of Our Lives
Eighteen years ago this morning I awoke to shouts from the hall of my dorm. “We’re going to war! We’re going to war!” The origin of the shouting was my neighbor Brian, known for his histrionics, so I went back to sleep. But soon after, I received a call from my high school quarterback, Justin, livin...