g Page 5438 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Media Approval Ratings: Paul Zimmerman
It's rare that an NFL column makes us feel like we just drank a bottle of wine, but that's what Paul Zimmerman — Dr. Z, if you're down with the hip parlance — does for us....

Don't Even THINK About It, Brett
You know, this is gonna come as a shock to you — and we do hope you are sitting down — but apparently Brett Favre (seriously!) turns out (you ready?) to be (here it comes!) thinking of unretiring. We know, right?!...

Terror From The Sky At Fenway Park
It may seem as if I'm writing this post under the influence of peyote, and believe me, I'm not above trying that. But in this case I'm sober and it's all true: A girl who was part of a school group touring Fenway Park on Thursday was attacked by a red-tailed hawk, who delivered a decisive hawk beat-...

Your NIT Champion Ohio State Buckeyes
Storming The Floor looks at last night's NIT championship game. Before they do, however, we'd like to point something out: We never had any idea that teams cut down the nets after winning the NIT. We suppose it makes sense, but still. All right, to Storming The Floor now....

About Last Night
What you missed while inventing the bacon bra ... • NFL: No matter how many times you kill him, Brett Favre simply will not go away. • College basketball: The Biggest Loser ... Ohio State wins NIT. • Tennis: It goes to 11 ... Roddick finally beats Federer....

Steve Lyons Would Like To See Your Breasts, Please
Here's an odd little story, featuring current Dodgers broadcaster Steve Lyons and a big-bosomed lady named Stacey Roy. From a court document filed on March 9, Stephen J. Lyons v. Fire Insurance, suggests that this is just a messy little money squabble between an ex-athlete and his homeowners insuran...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after bidding on the Miracle Jesus Spoon ... • Boxing: Welterweights, Joshua Clottey vs. Jose Luis Cruz; super welterweights, Yuri Foreman vs. Saul Roman, in New York. (9 p.m., ET). Fisticuffs in Brooklyn? Certainly not. [Versus] • College basketball: National Invitation Tournament, ch...

Kansas Fans Have Every Right To Hate Roy Williams
The general consensus concerning Roy Williams' "return" against Kansas at the Final Four this week is that it just broke his heart to leave Lawrence, and that any Jayhawks fan who is still angry with him is just being bitter. But on Phog.net, a Kansas fan message board, a poster named "pgalichia" su...

Stephen Curry's Mom...The Early Years
Davidson fans are overjoyed that guard Stephen Curry will not parlay his NCAA tournament popularity into a lucrative NBA contract. One other perk for school will be that his mother, Sonya, will also be in attendance next year, doing wonders for their national television coverage and alumni associati...

Who Knew Hondas Were So Roomy?
A few weeks ago, there was a message board post about Shaquille O'Neal hopping a ride with a fan (who's apparently named "Donger") from the Suns' parking lot over to his Diesel mobile in the next lot. The veracity of the story was questioned, even though the fan had photographic evidence of the occa...

Benny The Bull Will Put A Cap In Your Ass
When talking about illegal mascot shenanigans, no one, of course, beats the drunken exploits of the Stanford Tree. But running a close second is Benny the Bull, the only NBA mascot with a criminal record for battery on a police officer. On Tuesday he was at it again, shooting the Celtics' Kevin Garn...

All Hail The Sword Of Rathgar!
A confession: We love Medieval Times. We went there for a friend's birthday a couple of years ago, and when we went out drinking afterwards, we ran into the Red Knight. He was surly, even for a knight; he wouldn't even sign our plastic axe. Dick. Anyway, Rashard Lewis is apparently quite the Medieva...

Jason Smith Might Be A Little Itchy
According to ex-adult entertainer Mary Carey, Sixers rookie big man Jason Smith was the victim of her spider-monkey-esque make-out session on Monday night. Smith, the Sixers 20th pick in the 2007 draft, has provided playoff-bound Sixers some additional big-man depth off the bench this season but, ac...

Iron With The Fishes
• An underwater ironing world record. [On 205th] • Some helpful marathon tips for Tanzanians. [Lion In Oil] • Ovechkin, pretty good. [The Angry T] • Remembering the 2003 Knicks. [Stet Sports] • The Rays are off and running. [The Sports Scribbler] • The guys from The Dirty talk. Kind of. [LA Times Bl...

Storming The Floor's Postseason Awards
Storming The Floor does a comprehensive review of the 2007-08 college basketball season....

Media Approval Ratings: Craig Sager
By now, the factoid that Craig Sager was one of the guys who followed Hank Aaron around the bases on his record-breaking home run has been considered unknown for so long that it's now known by everybody. (If that makes sense.) Here's something we didn't know about Sager, though: He's six-foot-four. ...

Brian Kenny's Media Approval Rating Went Up A Little Bit
"That's it," Chad said, which startled Kenny. He then attempted a follow-up question which also went nowhere. Again, Kenny tries to sign-off gracefully and, again, Chad doesn't go away....

Welcome Back Everybody!
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who secretly wishes that the NBA regular season was even longer. When he's not formally requesting that David Stern institute a 300-game season, you can find him engaged in thrilling intellectual debates regarding fart jokes at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Agent Ze...

Giants Show Everyone Their Merkin
Tim Lincecum and Merkin Valdez, what an unbeatable duo. Both were instrumental in the Giants' first win of the season on Wednesday, 2-1 over the Dodgers. Witness this AP paragraph, which is my pick for paragraph of the year so far: The Dodgers announced less than 20 minutes before game time that Hon...

Chris Henry. Arrested. Again. Really, Chris? Really? (UPDATE: And Now He's Gone)
Chris Henry is going to be arrested again. This is a statement you probably could have made at any point in the last, oh, three years. But it's one you can make specifically for today. Because Chris Henry is being arrested today....