hi Page 1615 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Wanted: Boston-Area Roommate For High-Strung Veteran Wide Receiver Who Tweets A Lot
Chad Ochocinco, most recently in love with his quarterback: young, fetching Thomas Brady, needs a roommate in Boston. He wants a big Patriots fan, perhaps a real-life Tommy from Quinzee:...
Chris Johnson's Holdout Is Good News For Titans Fans; Eagles Fans Should Probably Worry About DeSean Jackson
Happy August 9th! It's a day you should have circled on your football calendar, because today's the day that players have to report to camp in order to accrue a year of service. As dictated by the new CBA, any players still holding out for reworked contracts will have to wait an extra year for their...
Grabby Arena Football Fan Draws A Flag
Arena football is different. It's the kind of sport where a fan reaches out of the seats to bodily prevent an opposing player from returning a kickoff. And more tellingly, it's the kind of sport where the home team's players then go over to congratulate the fan for interfering with play....
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: Lollapalooza 2011 Edition
It is August in Chicago, and that, of course, means that young people have descended upon the city for Lollapalooza so that they can post Facebook albums of themselves drinking Budweiser tall boys with Kid Cudi in the background and the caption "post-punk punk is dead tho." It also means that it is ...
Look At This Fucking Hoopster: Lollapalooza 2011 Edition
It is August in Chicago, and that, of course, means that young people have descended upon the city for Lollapalooza so that they can post Facebook albums of themselves drinking Budweiser tall boys with Kid Cudi in the background and the caption "post-punk punk is dead tho." It also means that it is ...
Australian Sports Are Designed For Incredible Catches
That's David Mead of the Gold Coast Titans with the incredible fingertip grab and score from this weekend's NRL action. Australians seem obsessed with anointing highlights the "try of the year" , but apparently rugby league is a totally different sport from Aussie Rules Football, so Mead can have ...
This Weekend In Unintentional-Dong Picture Submissions
Several of you sent in unintentional dong shots since Thursday night's "This Week In Unintentional-Dong Picture Submissions" post. Here, four of you get the attention you so greatly deserve....
This Lady Left Two Used Tampons Under Her Seat At Wrigley Field
Perhaps one is free to leave trash under one's seat at movie theaters or stadiums: popcorn, Pepsi, (Neifi) Perez memorabilia—but we ought to draw the line well short of endometrial cells....
Stay The Hell Away From Rehabbing Stephen Strasburg, You Mongrels, Minor League Team Tells Press
You may think it's Strasmas in August for the scribes of Hagerstown, Maryland, but you'd be wrong. Dead wrong....
Watch Nani's Pretty Half-Pitch Injury Time Goal To Clinch Manchester United's Comeback
This goal, from Nani, in stoppage time, is a triumph of all kinds of speed. Wayne Rooney ain't that fast....
Manscaping And A Mankini Helped MMA Reach Its Aesthetic Nadir At UFC 133
No one watches UFC—what with its bloody noses, sweaty chests, cauliflower ears—for beauty's sake. No one would confuse Dana White with Donna Karan. But holy lord, things got ugly in one of the undercard fights last night....
Here's Video Of A Smooth Assist In A German Soccer Match
Borussia Dortmund faced Hamburg to start their respective Bundesliga seasons yesterday, which you probably already knew. The former won the match 3-1, the highlight of which was Robert Lewandowski's assist on Mario Götze's give-and-go goal in the 29th minute....
Minor League Baseball Rain-Delay Dancing Fool Proves Tommy John Surgery Defeats Zombies
Tipster Andrew B. points out that Casey Mulligan, mere mortal of rain-delay Thriller 2009 performance fame, recently decided "to hang up the cleats at age 23 after deciding not to undergo Tommy John surgery. He was living the dream as a catcher turned pitcher with an actual shot to make it to the ...
Fox Has Some Odd Advice For What Cole Hamels Should Do On The Pitchers Mound Today
In all likelihood, Kenny Albert probably wishes his broadcast-booth script just said, "Throw a curve" instead of the "drop a deuce" line he just uttered on air....
Furries May Have Unwittingly Announced That Next Year's NHL Draft Will Be Held In Pittsburgh
Here's the title of a post from The Hockey News this morning: "Rescheduling of 'Furry' convention in Pittsburgh points to Penguins hosting 2012 NHL Draft." Oh really? Go on:...
Radio Guy Apologizes For Calling Giants Pitcher An "Illegal Alien"
When the Phillies and Giants sorta-brawled last night, radio guy Tony Bruno (on right in photo) sent out this Tweet: "gutless #!@%*! Giants. Bochy is a coward for having his illegal alien pitcher hit a guy since mighty Frisco boys ..." and quickly deleted it. But nothing's quickly deleted. ...
The Phillies And Giants Engaged In One Of Those Brawls That Really Aren't Brawls But Look Good On TV Anyway
Your morning roundup for Aug. 6, the day our Chinese overlords recommended we seek treatment for our mooching-trillions addiction. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Soccer Fans In Portland Still Behaving Curiously Like Soccer Fans In Any City Outside The United States
The Portland Timbers—seventh in the MLS's Western Conference and 7-10-4 overall—defeated the league-leading L.A. Galaxy 3-0 on Wednesday night. In spite of their hangovers, the Timbers Army was in fine form for the upset. Someone trained a camera on the heart of the crew just before Jorge Perlaza ...
Jay Cutler And Kristin Cavallari Are Returning The Wedding Gifts You Sent Them, With Dainty Notes In Some Cases
Previously, we brought you the story of some Deadspin readers who bought gifts for Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari off their wedding registry. Then we told you that the Bears QB dumped Cavallari. Here comes the fallout, courtesy of Crate & Barrel....
What Jock Culture Does To Pukes Like You
The following piece originally ran in The Nation's sports issue, on newsstands now....