hi Page 972 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

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First of all, shut the fuck up, James Taranto....

LAPD Confirms Active Criminal Investigation Into Derrick Rose For Alleged Sexual Assault [Update]<em></em>

Lawyers for the woman suing Derrick Rose and two friends for sexual assault filed a motion Sunday night arguing that the plaintiff should be allowed to keep her anonymity during the trial, both because there is an active criminal investigation by the LAPD into the alleged rapes and because the plain...

Known Man-Eating Fish Strikes England, Devours Goalkeeping Coach On Pitch

A tragedy was narrowly avoided this weekend when a gigantic, basketball jersey-clad fish, presumably hired as the halftime entertainment for the day’s Derby County-Blackburn match, attacked a poor goalkeeping coach in the middle of its act. Luckily, the man was not seriously harmed....

"Would You Believe A Home Run?" Dodgers Clinch N.L. West, Give Vin Scully One Final Walk-Off Call [Update]

The Dodgers came back from a 3-2 deficit in the bottom of the ninth as Corey Seager’s solo homer forced extras and Charlie Culberson homered in the tenth for a walk-off win—one that claimed the division for L.A. and gave Vin Scully the chance to call one final walk-off in his last time behind the mi...

Benches Clear After Nationals' A.J. Cole Throws Behind Pirates' Jung Ho Kang

The third inning of the Nationals-Pirates game featured—in order, each resulting from the one before—a fake tag, a Bryce Harper injury and a bench-clearing brawl....

Here's An Eagles Fan Wearing A Trump Mask Getting Hit In The Face With An Amoroso Roll

There really isn’t anything else to write. Enjoy the perfect timing in this slice of today’s Steelers-Eagles tailgate....

Former Michigan State Defensive Back Mylan Hicks Shot And Killed Outside Calgary Nightclub

Mylan Hicks, a former defensive back for Michigan State, was shot and killed outside a Calgary nightclub early Sunday morning....

Never Take Your Eyes Off The Quarterback

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Stanford Needed 59 Minutes To Score A Touchdown, But One Is All They Needed

Seventh-ranked Stanford came from behind to beat UCLA at the Rose Bowl tonight when Ryan Burns connected with JJ Arcega-Whiteside in the final minute of the game to give the Cardinal a 16-13 lead in a game that featured only a pair of offensive touchdowns....

Auburn Stuns LSU After Game-Winning, Last-Second Touchdown Taken Off Scoreboard By Replay Officials

An LSU game-winning touchdown pass on the final second of the game came off the board, giving Auburn a home win after replay officials judged the snap did not beat the buzzer....

High School Boys Soccer Team Forfeits Rather Than Risk Losing To Girls 

The boys soccer team of a Christian high school in Arizona decided to forfeit a game rather than play a team that included girls, citing religious beliefs....

How

Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], call our confidential tips hotline at (347) 746-8471, or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and sign up for our newsletter!...

USF Goes 84 Yards For TD On Game's First Play; FSU Goes 75 On The Second

Today’s Florida State-South Florida game in Tampa is 29 seconds old, and the score is already 7-7 after each team scored a touchdown on its first offensive play—the first, an 84-yard touchdown catch by Rodney Adams, and the second a 75-yard rush by Dalvin Cook:...

Washington State Plans To Force Students To Bail Out Broke Athletics Department

Washington State’s football team is 1-2 this season, including a loss to FCS team Eastern Washington. Head coach Mike Leach is still pulling a $3 million salary, though, and that’s contributed to an athletics department budget deficit—one the university plans to force students to bail out....

Utah Drives 93 Yards In Final Five Minutes To Beat USC

USC’s woes continued tonight as the Trojans allowed Utah to drive 93 yards while eating up nearly all of the 5:37 remaining on the clock on the way to a Troy Williams touchdown pass to Tim Patrick, the fifteenth play in a remarkable series that featured two fourth downs and multiple penalties....

Peaceful Student Protest Marches On Eastern Michigan Field As Game Ends

Eastern Michigan students protesting that university’s response to white supremacist graffiti that appeared on a campus dorm this week occupied an area behind an end zone during tonight’s game against Wyoming before marching onto the field upon the game’s completion in a display that, remarkably, CB...

How The Hell Do The Patriots Do It?

Bill Belichick and Josh McDaniels are rightly being universally praised for the game plan that resulted in last night’s complete ass whupping of the incompetent Texans. But the Patriots’ 3-0 start with a pair of inexperienced quarterbacks not named Tom Brady, and a total of 14 snaps with banged-up R...

Facebook Live Friday is here! Today’s simulation is tomorrow’s big Wisconsin-Michigan State game. Who will win? Find out, LIVE:...

This Video Of A Guy Executing Fish With A Pistol Is Actually Good Because Lionfish Suck

I think every non-sociopath’s first instinct when seeing the title card of the video above—which lives up to its billing, as this is indeed a four-minute clip of a man equipped with a waterproof Glock who uses it to “fish” for lionfish—is one of dread. Oh no, you worry, accurately. Am I really about...

Lawyer For Guy Who Pied Kevin Johnson Decries Lack Of Visual Evidence 

The attorney for political pie-thrower Sean Thompson is questioning the current lack of video evidence in the altercation with disgraced soon-to-be-former Sacramento mayor Kevin Johnson....