hp Page 20 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Baseball Won't Stop Serving Us Its Gross Fake Beef
We need to get some health inspectors into MLB, because the league just cannot stop serving up all this fake beef. More often than usual this season, it seems like teams are looking for the smallest of faux pas just to have an excuse to rush onto the field and perform some masculinity....
Goddamn, John Tortorella Is <i>Pissed</i>
I want to begin by noting that it’s pretty funny that this latest, greatest round of beef between the Blue Jackets and Penguins is all over Jack Johnson, of all players, a bottom-pairing defenseman on the wrong side of 30 and coming off his worst season as a pro. That said: Give me the beef!...
LeBronWatch Is Over, Because LeBron James Has Signed With The Lakers
LeBronWatch has ended: LeBron James will sign a four-year, $154 million deal with the Los Angeles Lakers. Klutch Sports Group, which sounds like a Macedonian gag news site but is actually the agency founded by LeBron’s pal and agent Rich Paul, broke the news. The announcement has a blatant disregar...
Criminal Couple's Harrowing Attempt To Escape Convenience Store Features Unbelievable Number Of Plot Twists
A man and a woman visited the King Street Reddi Mart in Spruce Grove, Alberta, Canada on Monday afternoon, and the convenience store owner eventually called the police on suspicion that the man had been using a stolen credit card. By the time the couple left the store, they had lost a shirt and a sh...
The Mets And Pirates Managed To Empty The Benches For No Reason At All
What happened between the Mets and Pirates in New York last night doesn’t qualify as a brawl or even a fracas, but it did constitute one of the silliest bench-clearings in recent memory....
17 Years Ago Today, Lloyd McClendon Stole First Base
True manager meltdowns feel like a thing of the past. Oh, sure, once in a while someone’s ass ends up in the jackpot, but those are few and far between these days. So let’s treasure the ones we get, and never forget the greats. Like then–Pirates manager Lloyd McClendon getting so upset over a close ...
The Pirates Want Sports Gambling Revenue To Fund Stadium Upkeep
With the Supreme Court paving the way for the legalization of sports gambling last month, sports leagues and teams have quietly dropped their longstanding opposition to gambling and have a new question: How can we get a cut?...
Heroic Bullpen Catcher Rescues Helpless Bats From Ballpark Flood
It rained just a bit in Pittsburgh this evening, forcing the postponement of tonight’s Brewers-Pirates game. But before Milwaukee bullpen catcher Marcus Hanel returned to the safety of his hotel room, he made the courageous, selfless decision to rescue some powerless equipment from the terrifying fl...
Pirates Relief Pitcher Sings The National Anthem Before Pirates Game
The Pirates have a college-educated singer in their bullpen, and they’re putting him to good use. Before Pittsburgh’s game tonight against the Brewers, relief pitcher Steven Brault stepped up to the plate and sang the national anthem, pulling off a rare feat that was maybe done most memorably in rec...
Sweaty Softball Parents Try To Brawl, Roll Around For A Bit, Ruin Daughters' Weekend
The video you’re about to watch is going to look chaotic as hell and sound like the end of days—almost immediately, your ears will be flooded with girls screaming at the top of their lungs while your eyes fixate on what appears to be a violent brawl. Upon closer inspection, however, you’ll realize t...
Fox U.S. Open Broadcast Features Two Dudes Talkin' About Fuckin'
“We were fucking so hard and I head-butted her in the head.”...
You Can’t Bet On Rutgers To Win The National Title: The First Day Of Sports Gambling In New Jersey
I almost didn’t get to place a bet that ended up winning me $100....
The Mets Screwed Up A Chance At Greatness Because They Couldn't Stop Being The Mets
When the Mets stuck Jacob deGrom with his second loss of the season on Wednesday afternoon, it was their 10th defeat in 11 games. DeGrom, who has been the best starting pitcher in the National League, allowed just one earned run and struck out seven over seven innings. The Mets didn’t get a hit off ...
Unwritten Rules Lead To Nine Unanswered Runs
The Diamondbacks were toast. Joe Musgrove was dealing for the Pirates, allowing Arizona just four hits through six as Pittsburgh sat on a 5-0 lead. “We were lying flat,” D-Backs manager Torey Lovullo said. And then the Pirates had to go and put a leadoff batter on. Retaliation, you know. Unwritten r...
Bitchin' Politician Just Blasts Himself Right In The Eyeballs With Pepper Spray!
Levi Tillemann is a Democrat running for Congress in Colorado’s sixth congressional district, and he wants you to know he is a leader who will work to “break through the partisan gridlock” and honestly I missed most of the rest of it because holy shit the guy just unloads a fucking quart of pepper s...
Ho Hum, Dennis Rodman Weeping On CNN Over The Personal Sacrifices He's Made To Broker Peace With North Korea
Monday night North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un joined a historic summit with Donald Trump, a sleazy failed businessman turned sleazy reality television star turned sleazy opportunistic Republican turned President of the United States, and I mean to tell you we haven’t even gotten to the truly psyche...
Finally, There's Video Of The Mizzou Arena Joyride
Nearly a year later, footage of one man’s bold, very illegal joyride through Missouri’s basketball stadium has been made public. It does not disappoint....
Extremely Online Baseball Knowers Go To War Over "Games Above .500"
Baseball is Ye Olde American Pastime, old enough to have developed its own language and customs and conventions. For example, everyone who follows baseball knows that “7.1 innings” should be understood to mean “seven-and-a-third innings,” even though that’s not at all how decimals work. You could re...
Woman Arrested For Starting Fires In Kansas City Royals Outfield At 4:30 A.M.
A 36-year-old woman named Bridget DePriest has been arrested by Kansas City police and charged with trespassing and open burning after she allegedly set several fires on the Kauffman Stadium grass. DePriest was caught by a ballpark security guard around 4:30 a.m. on Wednesday, after he shined a flas...
"Poo Jogger" Caught In The Act
It’s a story as old as time: A man was taking poops where he wasn’t supposed to, and his neighbors have caught him in an elaborate sting operation by hiding in the bushes with a camera....