ick Page 516 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Picking Your Nose On Television Is Not A Violation Of BYU's Honor Code
Hot on the heels of a fervent nationally-broadcast nosepicker, a BYU fan is running with the nostril-spelunking baton. Last night's NIT bout in Provo between the Cougars and Washington turned out to be a snoozer, but even early on this gentleman was more interested in his own sneezer....

MLB Is Trying To Dick Some Of Its Employees Out Of Their Pensions
Sure, Bud Selig and Major League Baseball may be the plucky underdogs when the league gets into a scheduling dispute with the all-mighty NFL, but that doesn't mean the MLB isn't also a vampiric organization with its own free-market-or-bust tendencies. Case in point: MLB owners are expected to vote ...

Atlanta Cheerleader Carted Off Court After Bizarre Injury
Between the third and fourth quarters of tonight's Hawks-Mavericks game in Atlanta, a Hawks cheerleader slipped and appeared to hit her head on the court....

Suburban Mayor Willing To Give The Chicago Cubs 25 Acres Of Land To Build A New Stadium
Brad Stephens is the mayor of Rosemont, a village less than 20 miles outside Chicago, and he's making a run at the Cubs. While the Cubs continue to fight with the city of Chicago over various restrictions in place, preventing the team from optimizing its cashflow, Mayor Stephens has said the Rickets...

Vince Carter Gets His Ankles Destroyed By Kevin Durant
Hey Vince Carter, you are old! Your ankles would really appreciate it if you would stay away from 6-foot-10 mutants like Kevin Durant from now on. ...

Nick Diaz Doesn't Pay His Taxes, Is A Crazy Person
Nick Diaz was soundly beaten by Georges St-Pierre in UFC-158 Saturday night. When it was over, someone apparently gave him his hat and he just started talking....

Man Shoots Himself In Dick's Sporting Goods After Asking For Shotgun From Store
Last night around 7 p.m., 58-year-old Mark McCarpy walked into Dick's Sporting Goods in Fairless Hills, Pennsylvania, and asked to see a shotgun and ammunition. When the clerk complied, McCarpy pulled out a handgun and demanded the clerk undo the shotgun's gun lock. McCarpy then took the gun and amm...

Justin Durant's Jokey Chick-Fil-A Application Is Actually A Rite Of Passage For America's Child Laborers
This week Detroit Lions linebacker Justin Durant, a free agent, popped by a Chick-fil-A and filled out part of an application. (Middle initial: R.) His explanation was succinct. “Rough outchea bruh,” he tweeted....

Millionaire College Basketball Coach Describes College Basketball's Emphasis On Money As "Hypocrisy"
Our friend Sally Jenkins wrote a column on the death of Big East this Thursday, and quoted University of Cincinnati head coach Mick Cronin, who was very passionate about the conference's widely perceived demise:...

Portland Fan Picks His Nose In Direct View Of TNT's Broadcast, Winks At Camera
This man has incredible form....

Louisville Beats Villanova, Hangs With Bill Clinton
Fourth-ranked Louisville rolled over Villanova, a 74-55 trouncing that was both expected and cursory. It sets up a final four showdown with Notre Dame tonight, while Syracuse and Georgetown face off again in the other semifinal. While the Big East tournament isn't dead, it will be different. The cur...


Bill Belichick Answered Fan Questions On His Girlfriend's Twitter Account
So this was kind of weird. Last night, Linda Holliday, host of Styleboston and girlfriend of New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick, sent out this cryptic tweet:...

"He's Playing A Different Game Than Most Other Humans": Ricky Rubio Goes Behind-The-Back Twice For A Layup
This goes down as just two points, Ricky Rubio cutting to the basket and metaphorically pantsing Patty Mills and Aron Baynes in quick succession. But it's a pretty good microcosm of what he's capable of on his best nights: "making art," as the announcer says. Hang this opus in the MIA, because last ...


Michael Vick Cancels Book Tour Because Of Death Threats
Vick was scheduled to sign copies of his book, “Michael Vick: Finally Free," in three Barnes & Noble locations in Atlanta, New Jersey and Pennsylvania. That's not accidental, those areas are probably the only places in the country where at least some people like him....

Mets Utility Player Jordany Valdespin Took A Fastball Right To The Dick
It's been a day of highs and lows for Jordany Valdespin. First, he took Justin Verlander deep to lead off his team's spring training game against the Tigers:...

Amar'e Stoudemire To Get Knee Surgery, Out For Six Weeks
After complaining of knee soreness today before the New York Knicks' game against against the Jazz, forward Amar'e Stoudemire underwent an MRI. The result showed that Stoudemire's right knee needed a debridement, or surgery to removed dead and damaged tissue. He'll miss six weeks....

Google Translating World Baseball Classic Coverage: "The Shortstop, Jimmy Rollins Hit Embazó With The Forest Law"
Last night, the U.S. played its first game in this year's World Baseball Classic, and we learned a number of things: 1. America's official language is English, 2. The best the U.S. can do for an ace in an international competition is a kuckle-balling 38-year old, and 3. "With people on the pads, Lui...

Vince Carter's Drug Rehab Facility Is Broken Down And Closing
Did you know Vince Carter plopped down $1.6 million in 2008 toward the construction of a drug rehabilitation facility in Bunnell, Fla., a town half an hour up the road from Daytona Beach? Did you know that Stewart-Marchman-Act Behavioral Healthcare, the operators of the $8 million facility, named it...