il Page 790 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Do Not Watch The Knicks For Any Reason Besides A Flying Mitchell Robinson
In the middle of an 18-game losing streak, with the tank reaching levels deleterious to the mental health of players and viewers alike, there aren’t a whole lot of reasons to subject yourself to the Knicks. The only one I can offer you with a straight face is Mitchell Robinson, an ent with hops. Ro...
Is Papa John A Sincere Kentucky Fan?
So Bob Costas spoke openly to Mark Fainaru-Wada and ESPN—to his eventual regret, he says—about being gradually phased out at NBC after his bosses chafed at him accurately claiming that the sport of football destroys brains. You can easily read the story and see that Costas was right to speak openly ...
Dirk And Wade Buried The Hatchet
Dwyane Wade’s season-long farewell tour spent last night in Dallas, the NBA city where he’s probably most hated, first for beating the Mavericks in the 2006 Finals by drawing an ungodly amount of fouls, and then for repeatedly antagonizing local legend Dirk Nowitzki. This is also almost certainly No...
Steve Kerr Goes Fucking Ballistic At The Climax Of A Warriors Meltdown
In the fourth quarter of Wednesday night’s Warriors-Trail Blazers game, referee Kenny Mauer went to the replay monitor to check a hard foul from Draymond Green on a cutting Zach Collins. The game had already gotten chippy, after a huge Collins chase-down block at the other end seemed to unsettle the...
Isaiah Thomas's Excellent Sports Child Makes It Impossible To Root Against His Shrimpy Dad
Isaiah Thomas returned to the court Wednesday night for the first time in nearly 11 months, as a reserve for the Denver Nuggets. He was pretty good, going for eight points in 13 minutes of burn, and finishing plus-2 in a game the Nuggets won on another hideous Nikola Jokic game-winner....
Joel Embiid Almost Murders Statistician In Quest For Loose Ball<em></em>
Joel Embiid hustled like hell to get a loose ball in the third quarter of tonight’s 76ers-Knicks game, and he endangered several lives in the process. While Tracy Morgan looked on, the Philly big man hurtled straight over Regina King as he tried to save his team’s possession. But when he cannonballe...
Poop Johnson Is Back In The News
No, his first name is not really “Poop.” It’s Cory. That doesn’t take anything away from how this transaction was delivered, though:...
Jayson Tatum Needs To Shut Down His Kobe Brain And Play More Like This
Jayson Tatum used to look a little different. Early in last season’s playoffs, Albert praised the Celtics rookie’s knack for catching the ball on the move while defenses were still in flux, making his knifing drives all the deadlier. At 19, with his team’s two stars broken on the sidelines, he was a...
Report: Browns Owner Jimmy Haslam Is A Big Pouty Baby
Just two years into a four-year advertising deal with ESPN, Browns owner Jimmy Haslam is cutting it off, reportedly because he’s upset about a story ESPN published a few weeks ago about Haslam’s chaotic and unsuccessful ownership of the Cleveland Browns, the Sports Business Journal reported today. ...
Big Boban Flicked One Over Small Al
It’s always a treat to see the hands of Boban Marjanovic manipulate a tiny basketball. During the Sixers’ loss to the Celtics Tuesday night, the Philly center was regularly corralling rebounds without leaving the floor. He snagged this one like an apple off a high branch:...
Joel Embiid Ends Press Conference By Declaring That The Referees "Fucking Suck"
The freshly beefed-up Philadelphia 76ers faced a reeling and miserable Boston Celtics team in Philly last night, and thus had the opportunity to put a signature win on their increasingly hated rivals. Instead, they got beat 112-109 (despite the Celtics not having Kyrie Irving on the floor), and Joel...
LSU Devastates Papa John With Tip-In Winner Against Kentucky
The LSU-Kentucky game at Rupp Arena was a thriller won by the Tigers in the final seconds, 73-71. The back-and-forth home stretch was engrossing for everyone who watched, not least of which was noted Kentucky fan and damp fratboy Papa John, who sat behind the UK bench and was deeply, visibly involve...
Papa John Joins Long And Noble Tradition Of Asshole Kentucky Bandwagoners
Disgraced pizza man Papa “John” Schnatter, having been ostracized by the University of Louisville after he was revealed as a racist and a horrible boss, has evidently abandoned all support for his formerly beloved Cardinals. Instead of continuing to root for Louisville despite the removal of his nam...
Ole Miss Responds To Vacated Wins With A Giant Shrug<em></em>
Ole Miss football has been complete garbage for most of the last six years, at least according to the NCAA’s latest, useless sanctions. College football’s governing body finally handed down a ruling in a long disciplinary process against the Rebels, and the school now has to vacate 33 of the team’s ...
The NFL Coaching Failson Bar Has Been Lowered
The NFL coaching ranks are filled with failsons.* Always have been, of course, but it feels especially acute these days. In just the last week or so, we’ve seen: the Rams hire Wes Phillips, son of Wade (and grandson of Bum); three different Belichicks on one staff; that same team hire Mick Lombardi,...
Report: Woman Accusing Justin Fairfax Of Rape Told Friends She Previously Was Raped By Corey Maggette
The New York Times reported tonight that Meredith Watson, the woman who has said she was raped by Virginia Lt. Gov. Justin Fairfax when they were students at Duke, told two friends that she also was raped by former NBA player Corey Maggette while they were at the university. One discussion was with ...
Brett Brown Really Wants Ben Simmons To Keep Shooting Threes
The Philadelphia 76ers beat the Lakers 143-120 yesterday, despite star point guard Ben Simmons scoring just eight points and going 3-of-13 from the field. That should tell you just how talented the Sixers are, and also why so much of the postgame talk centered around Simmons’s jump shot....
JaVale McGee Lets Out High-Pitched Scream To Let Teammates Know He's Open
There weren’t a lot of highlights for the Lakers in the second half of their game against the Sixers on Sunday, but thankfully JaVale McGee was around to make things somewhat entertaining. After Tobias Harris rotated away from McGee in the post, the Los Angeles big man still hadn’t been passed the b...
Magic Johnson Wants To Assure You He Won't Be Tampering During His Potential Offseason Workouts With Ben Simmons
After the Lakers’ front office, LeBron James and Klutch Sports were thoroughly embarrassed by the Pelicans at this year’s trade deadline, one would think it’d be wise for all those involved to maybe take a step back when questions about players from other teams come up. Unfortunately for Magic Johns...
Zion Williamson Temporarily Activates His Flying Abilities To Bash Three-Point Shot Into Crowd
In Duke’s 81-71 win over Virginia on Saturday, Zion Williamson had once again used his athletic ability to create a jaw-dropping highlight that still can’t fully be explained over 12 hours later. With 4:40 remaining in the game, Virginia’s Jay Huff found a wide open De’Andre Hunter in the corner for...