im Page 747 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Dodgers Are Concerned Enough About Fan Violence To Offer Half-Priced Booze At Six Upcoming Games
The Los Angeles Dodgers have talked a good game in returning their stadium to something that doesn't resemble a gangland Thunderdome where opposing fans get beaten into comas for no discernible reason....

College Kid Who Cried "Coach Attacked Me" Apparently Decided To Steal Two Beers From The Phillies
Your morning roundup for April 8, the day the Associated Press union decided to stick it to The Man, with whom it's negotiating a new contract, by not promoting stories on Facebook and Twitter next week. Consequences will never be the same....

Go To Gelf's Varsity Letters Tonight And Listen To Great Boxing Writing
NYC folks: Gelf's Varsity Letters free reading series returns tonight, with boxing writing from Thomas Hauser, George Kimball, and Gary Andrew Poole. Head to Le Poisson Rouge on Bleecker Street at 7:30. It will, as usual, be le great. [Gelf]...

Real Men Support The Cleveland Indians By Kissing One Another On Live Television
Your morning roundup for April 7, the day that attempted courtroom eye-gouging became a no-no....

The Dodgers Seemingly Want Their Fans To Stop Beating People Into Comas
Six days after a San Francisco Giants fan was brutally beaten outside Dodger Stadium, former LAPD Chief William Bratton has been hired to review security at and around the park. Said team owner Frank McCourt, Bratton will "lead a top-to-bottom review of our current practices and make recommendation...

Derrick Mason Says Roger Goodell Is A Joke For HGH Stance
This is not going to make America's $1 Commissioner very happy: Derrick Mason, Ravens wide receiver and an NFL vet so tenured that he debuted with the Tennessee Oilers, thinks Roger Goodell is a joke....

This Texas Rangers Broadcast Clip Will Someday Be Evidence In Divorce Proceedings
Fun stuff from tonight's Rangers-Mariners telecast—good, old-fashioned Texan chivalry....

<i>SI's</i> Post-Championship Cover: Recycling A Jim Nantz Pun
Earlier today, we brought you wretched flashbacks from last night, when Jim Nantz, who is usually sharpei if mastiff, deployed the oldest dog-related puns in the bark. It was an announcing boner—the shih tzu see too often on TV. The line stank like poodle the moment we heard it....

Eric Naposki, '80s Linebacker, Will Face Murder Charges; Goodell Probably Cannot Suspend Him
Some geriatric chickens coming home to roost on this one: former Colts and Patriots linebacker Eric Naposki will indeed have to face a jury on murder charges, after a judge declined to dismiss the case against him on Friday....

Jim Nantz Predictably Overdoes It With The Dog Puns
To be fair to Worst Man Jim Nantz, we understand that a Huskies-Bulldogs final is a bit like Christmas for him. A Christmas trimmed with multiple opportunities for insufferable references to dogs and winning. And so when the buzzer sounded, Nantz dropped three dog puns in under 20 seconds. It was ...

This Year's "One Shining Moment" Includes Very Few Moments From The Title Game
Your morning roundup for April 5, the day Michael Jackson took watch over Fulham FC's stadium....

Muppet Goalie Lawsuit? Muppet Goalie Lawsuit
Arsenal's Jens Lehmann is suing fellow goalie Tim Wiese of Werder Bremen for telling media Lehmann should "go to the Muppet Show" back in September. He's seeking $28,000....

Raiders WR Louis Murphy Arrested For Viagra Possession
The Gainesville Sun buried the lede in its exclusive on Sunday, when it noted that former Gator (and now Raider) wide receiver Louis Murphy had been arrested for resisting arrest and possession of a drug sans prescription....

What's Really Special About This Picture Is That Chipper Jones May Have Signed A 7-Inch Sperm Replica
The first weekend of baseball season wouldn't be complete without an "Atlanta Braves Chipper Jones Sperm Autograph" available to the highest bidder. As of 11 a.m., there were zero takers on the starting bid of $1. Fine, it's not authenticated, but this is still shocking when you consider that there...

The Kentucky Wildcats Refused To Go Down Without A Fight Or An Internationally-Televised Nut Tap
Your morning roundup for April 3, the day it became clear that 16-year-old girls at meth labs hope you have rabies....

Dennis Rodman Recognizes The Importance Of Family
Your morning roundup for April 2, the day that the color starts returning to the knuckles of passengers and crew on Southwest Flight 812, the plane with a three-foot hole in its side....

Former Penn State Coach Who Titled His Autobiography "Touched" Stands Accused Of Improperly Doing So
A grand jury is investigating allegations that "Penn State football legend" Jerry Sandusky indecently assaulted a 15-year-old boy over the course of a four-year period. Both Joe Paterno and Penn State Athletic Director Tim Curley were called to appear, according to the Patriot-News newspaper in cen...

Timing The Trots For Six Famous Home Runs; Or, Bo Jackson Will Blow Your Mind
As a Brewers fan, it's pretty common to hear from others around the NL Central that no one is worse at watching and admiring his home runs than Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun. And while I can understand where these Cards and Cubs fans are coming from, I don't completely agree. After all, I get to see...

Take A Look At Tim Lincecum's Brand New Jordanesque Logo
Tim Lincecum will be on the mound (and on the Magazine cover) as the Giants open their season this evening with an 8 p.m. EST game against the Dodgers. There's always been something about Lincecum that suggests an aversion to selling-out or going for products (it's the long hair; I'm stereotyping) s...

Today's The Day Baseball Fans Everywhere Except Pittsburgh Dream Of World Series Victory
Your morning roundup for March 31, the day a Bellaire, Ohio chair mourns the obese man who sat upon it for the past two years, leaving more than skin behind....