im Page 874 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"Kick Me In The Jimmy!"
Jaguars defensive tackle John Henderson needs that extra little slap in the face to get ready for gametime. Funny, as Brett Myers does the same thing to his wife come bedtime. I'd like to think Joe there was hired solely for this purpose. As seen on Jaguars job board: "Wanted: fella with shaved hea...
This Is What It Sounds Like When A Franchise Dies
We missed Bill Simmons' impassioned work for Sonics fans while we were on vacation, but it's really pretty excellent stuff, and exactly what a national sports columnist should be doing with his platform. Not that anyone will notice, or do anything, or care....
That's An Okay Snag
WithLeather offers up one of those flying-diving-catch-while-throwing-yourself-over-a-wall-plays, if you're into that sort of thing. Isn't that wall kind of short? When you're a hater like myself, you need to discredit the achievements you couldn't possibly make. As another video of the same catch a...
If Wilt's 100-Point Game Were Modernized
As we conclude another lazy "Baked Doritos and curling on TV" Sunday, we remember that 46 years ago was the night Wilt Chamberlain scored 100 points against the New York Knicks (snerk) in a game. And the Dayton Daily News poses a good question: how would it be covered today? Oh, there's nothing bett...
Barry Bonds Ain't Buildin' Mansions For Any White People
It's been safe to say that the text of the Mitchell Report, coupled with the Congressional testimony by Roger Clemens, has been for the most part unfulfilling. So when Barry Bonds' 2003 testimony to a federal grand jury leaked out yesterday, the natural reaction was a cacophonic "meh."...
Night Of The Killer Zamboni
• Help! I don't know how it works! • Bob Knight is an ESPN analyst! I see no way this can end badly. • The St. Louis Cardinals post that almost wasn't. • Canadian hockey players remind us that high school is supposed to be fun. • Will goes on a tropical island vacation, wakes up in the Scottish mili...
Welcome Back, Baseball. We've Missed You
Shhh, listen ... baseball season is here! We know because we hear the anguished cries of collegiate players being pummeled by the pros. In sports' version of a large man chasing a dachshund with a shovel, baseball continued its storied and venerable tradition of major league teams opening spring tra...
Barry Bonds May Be Leaving Our Shores
According to Babel Fish, this is the Japanese word for steroids: ステロイド. Wouldn't it be somewhat hilarious if some jokester printed that on Barry Bonds' jersey this year? Because that's where Bonds is likely headed, according to his agent. Jeff Boras, who has been shopping around his client in spring...
Spending a Night With Oscar
The Academy Awards might not have anything to do with sports, but they give me an excuse to run this picture from Sports Wrap. Plus, there's going to be plenty of Jon Stewart, cleavage, and gambling opportunities, all things a lot of us enjoy. Follow after the jump for my bets and my pick for best c...
Klitschko Wins An Easy Decision Over Ibragimov
It wasn't an exciting fight and it certainly won't propel him into the big money, but Wladimir Klitschko won a unanimous decision over Sultan Ibragimov. I had the fight scored as a 12 round shutout, but the judges were a bit more kind to the Russian....
The Volunteers and Tigers Are Delivering At FedEx
I'm back from the Wizards game and I'm actually in a good mood because they won. And hey, the Bobcats minus Gerald Wallace are tough! Since I've been back I've had a chance to catch up on this 1 vs. 2 matchup and frankly, it's even better than the Wizards and Bobcats. The action has been high paced ...
Wladimir's Morning Wood
Tonight Wladimir Klitschko will square off against his best opponent to date in Sultan Ibragimov in a big first step toward unifying the heavyweight title. Vitali's little brother is widely considered to be the best heavyweight on the planet and a win tonight at Madison Square Garden would cement th...
Justice Is Blind, Which Accounts For All The Typos
Finally, Barry Bonds has discovered an airtight defense for his upcoming trial on perjury and obstruction of justice charges. Typos! Yep, Bonds' lawyers on Thursday contended that, because the government filed court papers on their client that had at least two typos, that Barry should walk free. Hey...
Tony Romo And Jessica Simpson Preparing For Wedded Bliss
Sure Jessica Simpson may have been a distraction to the Cowboys this past season; the only thing standing between the franchise and a Super Bowl championship (tries to suppress gales of laughter). So to ensure a healthy and successful 2008 season, Tony Romo should dump her, right? Well here's a solu...
Welcome Back, Psychopath
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Jim Bowden Uses Subtle Reminders Of His Authority
We're not sure what much more we can add to this photo of Nationals general manager Jim Bowden riding a Segway around the team's spring training....
Baseball Season Preview: Los Angeles Angels Of Anaheim
For the third consecutive season, we are proud to introduce the Deadspin Baseball Season Previews. Yes, baseball is awfully close now; it's spring training, after all....
Eli: Cover Boy?
For its top selling Madden NFL franchise, Electronic Arts Tiburon typically selects an electrifying player who epitomizes the furious intensity of NFL action, while appealing to average young football fan....