in Page 3352 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Aussie With World's Largest Collection Of Antoine Walker Memorabilia May Also Have World's Only Collection Of Antoine Walker Memorabilia
Matt Clarke from Australia calls himself the "biggest Walker fan in the world." (He's referring to former NBA/current Idaho Stampede player Antoine Walker, in case you don't share his passion.) We will not attempt to disprove that claim. If anyone else on this galaxy happens to own Walker's Timberwo...
Former Paterno Assistant Indicted On Charges Of "Involuntary Deviate Sexual Intercourse," Among Other Things
A "Penn State coaching legend" once considered the successor to Joe Paterno was indicted today by a grand jury on some very nasty sex abuse charges. Two years ago, Jerry Sandusky, the former defensive coordinator for the Nittany Lions, was accused of "inappropriate contact" with a teenage boy. The e...
Michael Jordan The Player Would've Hated Michael Jordan The Hardline Owner
Over at SB Nation, Tom Ziller has compiled some of Michael Jordan's contradictory views on the NBA lockout. In a meeting during the '98 lockout, for example, Jordan the player told Wizards owner Abe Pollin, "If you can't make it work economically, you should sell the team." Ziller points out that in...
The Trystan Magnuson Era In Toronto Begins, And Other Exciting Hot Stove Developments
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!!...
Jesse Ventura Is Sick Of America, Plans To Become Mexican
Former professional wrestler turned former action movie hero turned former Minnesota governor Jesse Ventura is about to turn Mexican, the AP reports. Ventura is ticked off that he lost a lawsuit against the federal government (of the USA) on Thursday, alleging that airport scans and pat-downs amou...
3,000 Cards Fans Will Now Claim The Autographed Hat A Cubs Fan Found On The Highway
Did you lose a 2011 World Series championship cap autographed by Cardinals players somewhere on I-74 in central Illinois recently? Of course you did. A Cubs fan found it, and now he wants to return it to its rightful owner—you: "He says whoever comes forward will have to know about an unexpected sig...
The Death Of A Former Football Player At An Underground Fight In A Church Has, Somehow, Resulted In A Lawsuit
The church along the Broken Arrow Expressway in Tulsa is of the Christian-capitalist mega-variety. You know the deal: rock shows, slick website, a gift shop, deadly unsanctioned boxing fights. One such fight on Sept. 21, 2011, allegedly resulted in the death of George Clinkscale, who played lineback...
How Many Times Have We Farted In Human History? A Very Rough Calculation
I was sitting next to my friend on a bus the other day. He farted. It got us thinking: How many farts have there been in human history?...
This Is Why You Don't Ask A Professional Athlete To Be A School "Reading Champion"
I absolutely cannot think of a better inspiration for getting schoolchildren to read than by choosing a man who got very rich without ever having read a book in his life....
Cockblocked By Rugby!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Low-Budget Pitbull Imitator Produces Nauseating "Do The Mark Sanchez" Video
There aren't too many lyrics here, other than "do the Mark Sanchez," and "heart of a champion," so it's hard to dispute their words with statistical evidence. (Of note: the call-and-response here is "Who's number one?" "We number one!" But "we" could really be the Jets or the performers.) Mark San...
Floyd Mayweather Isn't Ducking Manny Pacquaio; He's Being Persecuted, Or Something
Floyd Mayweather Jr. didn't take too kindly to Sirius radio host Rude Jude's accusation that he's afraid to fight Manny Pacquiao. So Mayweather decided to call Jude's show yesterday, at the urging of 50 Cent, and you can listen to the audio above. Mayweather never directly addresses the issue at h...
Persian Awakening In Perry Hall: Uptight Mullahs Forced To Reverse Decision On Soccer Team's Bernie Dance
Yesterday, we brought you news that the Grand Ayatollah of Perry High School in Maryland had cancelled the boys varsity soccer season after players did the Bernie on the field. The dance was deemed "unacceptable" by the Grand Ayatollah, who also goes by the name Principal George Roberts....
America Likes LSU Tomorrow; Vegas Doesn't
Alabama is at -4.5 offshore and in most of Vegas, and that hasn't come down much despite the vast majority of bettors backing LSU—75 percent by one estimate. But it's all "$20 and $50 bets." The big money has withheld judgment so far....
Even Criminal Lobbyist Jack Abramoff Lectured Dan Snyder About The Redskins Name, Likening It To "The New York Jew Boys"
Scumbag lobbyist and George Bush leg-humper Jack Abramoff has a self-serving book out called Capital Punishment: The Hard Truth About Washington Corruption From America's Most Notorious Lobbyist. In the book, which you should not buy, Abramoff details his relationship with Dan Snyder, whom Abramoff ...
Jurgen Klinsmann Needs 90 Words To Say Nothing
With friendlies against France and Slovenia looming, the U.S. men's soccer team will start getting blooded against stronger competition. Jurgen Klinsmann continues to tinker with lineups and test out new players, so we can't fault him too much for the 1-1-3 record he's compiled to date. But don't th...
The Official Who Breaks Up A Hockey Fight Will Sometimes Get Punched In the Face. Twice.
Your morning roundup for Nov. 4, the day we finally had it up to here with hugging. Video of hockey fight via Cosby Sweaters; H/T to Alicia. For an excellent GIF of Cal Clutterbuck's punch, be sure to check out West Coast Digress. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Alex Trebek Suggests Jeopardy Contestant Is Kinky After She Provides This Sexy Wrong Response
Kara Spak is a reporter for Chicago's Sun-Times, but she turned a September Jeopardy! appearance into a side career when she won five straight games and pocketed $85,401. The feat earned her an appearance on tonight's episode of the always-popular "Tournament of Champions," and this answer in the ...
This Evening: Aaron Rodgers Was Rambo For Halloween
Your p.m. roundup for Nov. 3, the day we learned salt makes everything better. Photo courtesy Busted Coverage, via @NanciFilipelli. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Albert Pujols Spotted At The Airport In St. Louis. But Where Could He Be Going?
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!!!...