in Page 3407 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here's Video Of Michael Beasley "Mushing" A Fan At A New York City Park Last Night
We learned a new word today: mushing. A mush is when a person puts a hand directly onto another person's face and pushes him or her backward. Minnesota's Michael Beasley "mushed" a heckling fan at New York City's Dyckman Park last night. The incident is not expected to help his job security....

What Jock Culture Does To Pukes Like You
The following piece originally ran in The Nation's sports issue, on newsstands now....

Pirates Pitcher Finishes Inning, Gives Himself A Gatorade Shower, Pirates Lose Anyway
James McDonald had quite a game last night. Pitched seven innings for the first time this season. Rapped a bases-clearing double. Scored a run. And when he finished retiring the Cubs in order in the seventh, as the above video shows, he had himself a grand ol' time. The Pirates had (cough) been in...

Matt Stairs: Spectacularly Just Good Enough
Matt Stairs, who on Wednesday announced his retirement, was the character actor who had a few decent roles in the 1970s and played solid bit parts ever after. He was a Ned Beatty of a player. He had a fine career. Always on the roster for his offense, he delivered above-average results with the bat ...

Shane Victorino Could Have At Least Tried To Help The Kid Up
Your morning roundup for Aug. 5, the day after Pete Carroll ceded all responsibility for the Seahawks. Video of Victorino's indifference to the the bat boy falling is here. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

This Week In Unintentional-Dong Picture Submissions
Like images of Jesus on pancakes, toast and frying pans, reflections of the Virgin Mary in windows, or a Leprechaun sighting in an Alabama tree, dongs are all around us....

Let's Watch Larissa Riquelme "Compete" In Some Sort Of "Reggaeton Dance Contest"
Last night, Paraguay Cell Phone Girl Larissa Riquelme sent out a link called "Así concluyó el duelo de reggaetón" via Twitter. The loose translation is "Thus ended the duel of reggaetón." She's not wearing much, ends up with a belt looped around her neck and gets high marks from the judges. So the...

This Young Astros Fan Was Not Bashful About Flipping The Reds Off Last Night
The Houston Astros averted their 75th loss of the season last night in no small part because of some leftfielder named J.D. Martinez's two-RBI double to left in the seventh. This was an overwhelmingly awesome moment for one excitable boy fan who flipped a double bird....

Here's An Awkward Interview In Which Tommy Lasorda Ponders How He'd Pitch To A Dwarf
Last night, Tommy Lasorda made it perfectly clear that he wants to be referred to as "Tommy Pump" from now on. At present, Tommy Pump is on a mission to right the wrongs of Dodgers fandom....

Today Was The Day "Mandingo Cock Deasel" Became An American Hero
His name is Eddie Evans. His superpower is rescuing his fellow man from a burning car at a Chevron gas station in DeKalb County, Ga. His choice of attire is what makes him the Stuff Of Legend....

NFL Tilts Stupidly At Stupid Windmill
The NFL has exciting new plans to implement a test of dubious efficacy for a substance of uncertain benefits. Whatever. We've been through this before, so I'll just note two things:...

This Evening: Try Not To Look As Bashful As Stephen Curry
Your p.m. roundup for Aug. 4, the day we learned where hipsters came from. Photo via The Basketball Jones. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Justin Tuck: If The Jets Are Kings Of NYC, Where's Their Crown?
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: shots fired. Pew pew....

The Winless, Scoreless Wonders Of Margatania FC
We're internet users too. We know setting aside ten minutes to watch something requires extraordinary circumstances, but these are about as extraordinary as they come. Please find the time, whether it be right now or later on, to watch "L'equip Petit," a short film about an under-7 team from a sma...

Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part VI: Robot Surrogates And The Abyss
Consider this your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this mother until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is frozen in amber so humans of the future can study the behavior of assholes in the 21st century. (For tho...

If Albert DeSalvo Wasn't The Boston Strangler, Who Was? Bill James Investigates
During the years 1962-64, 13 women in the Boston area were molested and then strangled by an assailant who came to be known as the Boston Strangler. In 1965, Albert DeSalvo, a convicted sex offender and patient at a local mental institute, began telling people he committed the murders. With the help...

Maryland, His Maryland: Randy Edsall Is The Lawgiver
Fresh off his BCS success (read: staving off mediocrity a little better than the rest of the Big East), Randy Edsall is the big man on campus in College Park. And while it's nice to feel wanted, Edsall appears to be the type to get drunk off the slightest bit of power. He's bringing in a heavy-hande...

Tony La Russa's Tortured, Petulant Justification For Plunking Ryan Braun, As Read By A 4-Year-Old Boy
You can watch Tony La Russa try and fail to justify himself — he cycles through logical fallacies as if they were middle relievers in a 5-4 ballgame against the Reds — or you can watch young Mack Scocca-Ho capture the essence of La Russa's monologue in the video above....

Jurgen Klinsmann: America's Newest Soccer Jesus
Jurgen Klinsmann was introduced to the media this week as the new coach of the U.S. men's soccer team, a development in the making ever since the U.S. Soccer Federation batted eyelashes at Klinsmann before the 2006 World Cup. The coach spurned the USSF then, and instead led Germany to a third-place...

Rob Dibble Now Wants To Swaddle Stephen Strasburg In Warm Soft Blankets
A year ago at this time Rob Dibble was in the news for his contrarian opinions on Stephen Strasburg. Rob Dibble's in the news again for his contrarian opinions on Stephen Strasburg. Except this time it's the exact opposite contrarian opinion. What we're saying is, it's a good thing Strasburg's caree...