ja Page 596 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Nine-Year-Old Kid Might Well Be The World's Next Greatest Soccer Player
This lad, who has yet to be publicly identified, is being called "The Japanese Messi." For good reason. The kid's got footwork, pace and panache to the point where the guy who coached "The Real Messi" as a youth has linked to this clip via Twitter. Or, it could just be a farce, which would be sad....

Dennis Rodman Recognizes The Importance Of Family
Your morning roundup for April 2, the day that the color starts returning to the knuckles of passengers and crew on Southwest Flight 812, the plane with a three-foot hole in its side....

Last Night's Lakers-Mavs Game Got A Little Bit Brawl-y
The Lakers and the Mavs kept things interesting in one of the most under-scheduled nights of the NBA season last night: five players were ejected after a shoving match that began with Jason Terry and Steve Blake. The refs sent out two players from each team (Dallas's Terry and Brendan Haywood and ...

Short White Guy Wins College Dunk Contest
So ends the ballad of short white guy. Jacob Tucker captured our hearts, with his average height and above-average ability to jump and slam a basketball through a rim. And these were legitimately good dunks — no affirmative action here. But if you're wondering why such an athlete would be stuck in...

The Washington Nationals's Big Off-Season Signing Is Batting .250 And Possibly Sitting To Go Number 1
Jayson Werth, the Washington Nationals's $126 million right-field prize, went 1-for-4 with one strikeout in his Beltway debut, a 2-0 loss to the Atlanta Braves....

Timing The Trots For Six Famous Home Runs; Or, Bo Jackson Will Blow Your Mind
As a Brewers fan, it's pretty common to hear from others around the NL Central that no one is worse at watching and admiring his home runs than Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun. And while I can understand where these Cards and Cubs fans are coming from, I don't completely agree. After all, I get to see...

Today's The Day Baseball Fans Everywhere Except Pittsburgh Dream Of World Series Victory
Your morning roundup for March 31, the day a Bellaire, Ohio chair mourns the obese man who sat upon it for the past two years, leaving more than skin behind....

Short White Guy Will Dunk On National TV
Jacob Tucker, the 5'11" Division III YouTube sensation, officially received his invite to the College Slam Dunk Contest, to be held tomorrow night in Houston. You did it, you dogged internet voters. You made a young man's dream come true. (Not Rico Cunningham, the other DIII dunker nominee. You st...

Scott Raab Shaved "QUITNESS" Into His Head For LeBron's Return
Esquire's Scott Raab, whose LeBron Watch here chronicled Cleveland's inevitable doom last summer, still is not quite cool with LeBron James, the Whore of Akron....

The Cavs Got Their 15th Win Last Night, And It Happened To Be Over The Miami Heat
The Cleveland Cavaliers beat the Miami Heat at home last night, 102-90, for just their fifteenth win of the season. For the 51-23 Heat, who clinched a playoff spot over two weeks ago and just have to survive the remainder of the season without a significant injury, this was really just another sli...

VCU Has Now Forced Its Unbearable Victory Song Upon Us
Your morning roundup for March 30, the day Peter Venkman signed on to play FDR....

Coach K, Please Shut Up (Also: Jalen Rose Arrested For DUI)
We do some Duke-hating around these parts. And maybe a hair too much of it, if you ask no one. I mean, hey, Duke lost to VCU in 2007 in the first round, before it was cool....

Floyd Mayweather Bet $50k On The Cavaliers Tonight
Miami was in Cleveland tonight, taking on the Cavaliers, Zydrunas Ilgauskas' former team....

You Can Now Order Your Personalized Bears License Plate
Illinois has unveiled their new Chicago Bears license plates. To steal an idea from Fark, go personalize your own and leave it in the comments. Here's mine!...

They're Still Playing "Friday" At NHL Games, And At Least One Grown Man Is Enjoying It
We know that internet memes generally have a very particular shelf life, and we respect that Rebecca Black's "Friday" phenomenon might have worn out its welcome by now. When we first posted the video to accompany another meme, it had 200,000 views; it now has 61 million views and a dedicated Tumbl...

Sad Jayhawk Has "Absolutely No Regrets" About Being Sad Jayhawk
Before he was Sad Jayhawk, Matt Rissien was just another superfan: going to away games, wearing a costume, posing with luminaries like Erin Andrews and Scot Pollard. But, thanks to the vagaries of the universe and an alert cameraman, he's become more: a symbol of fallen hubris. A Crying Duke Kid or ...

VCU Has No Business In The Final Four, And We're Glad They're Here
Last week at this time, we were laughing at the Big East for being a weak conference, despite all the late winter talk about it being the best in college basketball. The evidence proffered was the number of teams left in the tournament. By that logic, the best conferences in college basketball at th...

The Weeping Kansas Jayhawk, In Happier Times
Your morning roundup for March 28, the day Lindsay became the artist formerly known as Lindsay Lohan....

Your VCU/Kansas Commemorative Keepsake Poster
Writes the Richmond Times-Dispatch: The VCU Rams pulled off one of the biggest upsets in NCAA tournament history, beating Kansas 71-61 in the championship game of the Southwest Region. The victory puts VCU in the Final Four. The Rams, considered a mid-major team from the Colonial Athletic Associati...

Richmond Fought The Good Fight Against Kansas Until The Game Started
Your morning roundup for March 26, when James Corley of Conroe, Texas mulls the misfortune of not stopping after his 15th DUI conviction. Now, he'll have 99 years to practice counting to 1,030....