ks Page 955 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

New Red Sox Logo A Hit Among Males 15-25, Bank Robbers
New Red Sox promotional slogan for 2009: We're Armed And Should Be Considered Dangerous ... or, Wanted In Connection With Fun And Excitement!...

Joe Montana's Offspring Will Pummel You, Take Your Lunch Money
Just because Oaks Christian High in Los Angeles never played a decently talented opponent this season is no reason to think that Nick Montana doesn't have a future as a quarterback. Or maybe it is....

Stephon Marbury Just Can't Stop Smiling, Making Knicks Uncomfortable
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call needs your help. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call...

The Cruel Emasculation Of Josh Howard
Everybody remembers when Josh Howard brought some unwanted attention to the Mavericks for going rogue on Michael Irvin's radio show by extolling the virtues of weed and admitted smoking it during the off-season....

Buzzer-Beaters Of The Gods ... Plus, Post-Game Microphone Carnage
Who hasn't dreamed at one time or another of doing this? The long 3 to win it ... ohhhhh! They're going crazy at the Carrier Dome! (Your fantasy may or may not include topless cheerleaders)....

LA Times Writer Makes Big Smurfing Mistake
Los Angeles Times' Mark Heisler calls Mavericks' guard Jose Juan Barea a "Mexican Smurf" in his power rankings. Funny, except that Barea is Puerto Rican. [LAist]...

Today's Special On The DVD Aisle: Secondhand Lions
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

The Hawks Do Everyone a Favor, Derail King James
Atlanta snaps Cleveland's winning streak, a rare Jerome James sighting, and a debut win for Philly's interim coach....

Why Doesn't Reggie Bush Get Any Respect? (It's Not The Hamsters)
ESPN's big Alaskan sled dog of a football analyst Mark "Stink" Schlereth was summoned to critique the performances after Thursday night's New Orleans Saints/Chicago Bears game. One player who didn't impress him? Reggie Bush....

Blackhawks Field Trip Now The Feel Good Story Of Mid-December 2008
The original tip about the Chicago Blackhawks and their winter sojourn to the funeral of GM Dale Tallon's father was actually a complaint that no one was talking about it. Well ... you win....

More Bone Crunching UFC Action
In case you need a break from watching Corey Hill's elongated flipper on a 24-hour loop, there was even more calcium-deficient moments from this week's UFC contest....

Famous Oaks Christian Progeny Go For Title Tomorrow
Big game on Friday night in Westlake Village near Los Angeles, as Oaks Christian High (13-0) takes on visiting Gardena Serra (13-0) in the Northwest Division championship game....

Chicago Blackhawks Star In A Heart-Warming Tale Of Thanksgiving Joy
I got an interesting email this morning about the Chicago Blackhawks. (Wait guys, that's not a joke!)...

If Mark Cuban Were An Abusive Hobbit
Looking for a toy that will compliment your child's ADHD while teaching him many new profanities in the process? It's the Ref-Baiting Mark Cuban Doll, with military stompin' boots and, apparently, kung-fu grip. Also, please note the "choking hazard" warning at the top, most likely added during the 2...

Do Not Mess With An Auburn Coach's Wife
Tommy Tuberville "resigned" yesterday as the head coach at Auburn University. Unfortunately, no one bothered to tell his assistants, who were out on the road recruiting, completely unaware that they no longer had jobs. As you can imagine, their families are not too happy about that, so a couple of a...

Drew Rosenhaus Is A Master At The Art of Circumlocution
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call....

Greetings, Spinheads
Happy day after Thanksgiving. Today is gonna be looser than usual, given both the tech issues and that the vast majority of you are out shopping, or hungover, or getting ready for high school reunions. We'll cover some stuff, we'll ignore a lot of stuff, and have some fun being buddy, buddy, buddy a...

Thank You, DUAN
Daulerio: Thank you readers for submitting all of these. I tried to get up as many as I could (obviously) as a way of showing my sincere appreciation for what you do down below. If I missed you, my sincere apologies. It wasn't because I don't like you or your heartfelt thank yous weren't amusing eno...

Why The Lions Belong On Thanksgiving
The Detroit Lions are (arguably, I know) the worst organization in sports. Their incompetence, from the owner to the fans, is legendary. Yet, tradition dictates that every year, just as families arrive at the homes of relatives they don't particularly care for in order to celebrate this giving of Th...

Programming Note: It's Turkey Jamboroo Day Tomorrow (And Ray's Doing the Carving)
Last year, we ran a Thanksgiving edition of the NFL Jamboroo the day before Thanksgiving. But we're gonna forgo that this year and run the Jamboroo early tomorrow morning. Why? Well, for one thing, there isn't fucking jack SHIT to do on Thanksgiving morning. You watch the parade for two minutes, yo...