lol Page 39 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Wayne Rooney Gets Dumbest Red Card Ever
Manchester United are taking on West Ham today, and after captain Rooney and striker Robin van Persie goals put United up two after just 22 minutes, West Ham pulled one back eight minutes before half. In the second half, the visitors settled in and began to dominate play. We've seen this movie befor...
Old-Ass, Fat-Ass Bear Roams Around Canadian Neighborhood
The residents of Port Coquitlam, British Columbia, have spent the last few days hosting a very old, very fat, and very chill bear....
Mets Writer Notes Team Hasn't Balked All Year; Mets Immediately Balk
This is just beautiful:...
Manchester United's Defenders Don't Actually Know How To Defend
Manchester United were supposed to play yesterday in England's League Cup. Instead, they were home chilling, because on August 26, they got curb stomped by third-division midtable side MK Dons. ...
Manchester United Dominate Leicester, End Up Getting Blown Out
You see that little guy up there? That's Filbert the Fox, Leicester City's mascot. Don't worry, he's feeling great. Though his club hosted the rich and famous Manchester United today, his boys managed to take down the giants. Those aren't tears of sadness, they're tears of mockery, directed at the...
MLS's Clint Dempsey Raps Like MLS Plays Soccer (Like Shit)
This is EXCLUSIVE FOOTAGE of Clint Dempsey, American and major league soccer player, rapping at a video game's New York launch party last night. It is weird. ...
![Jets Call Timeout, Nullify Own Game-Tying Touchdown, Lose Game [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/bkiq44i6kfhht2xp4fzn.jpg)
Jets Call Timeout, Nullify Own Game-Tying Touchdown, Lose Game [UPDATE]
The Jets called an illegal timeout to cancel out their own game-tying touchdown in the fourth quarter, and ended up losing to the Packers. It was a very Jets sequence....
Lolo Jones On Aching Feet, Memory Loss, And Other Perils Of Dancing
The new season of Dancing With The Stars kicks off on Monday, and among its contestants are the usual list of obscure B-list actors and Duck Dynasty granddaughters. And then there's Lolo Jones....
Former Mets Exec Sues Team, Says She Was Fired For Being Pregnant
I'd say this story belongs in the LOLMets pantheon, but this is less "ha ha" funny than it is "wow, the Mets appear to be run by a tremendously scummy sexist" funny....
MK Dons Score Gorgeous Goal While Bossing Manchester United
Milton Keynes Dons of League One—that's the league below the league below the Premier League—put a goddamn hurting on Manchester United in a League Cup match today, beating them 4-0 to the delight of nearly everyone in the world. Here is the third and prettiest goal of the match, featuring some deft...
Yasiel Puig, You Are Not <i>That</i> Fast
Yasiel Puig tried to score from second base on a ground-ball double play in the bottom of the sixth inning against the Mets. He did not score; he turned a double play into a triple play. So...it did not go well. ...
Jets CB Dimitri Patterson Has Been Missing Since Friday
Jets cornerback Dimitri Patterson has been missing since Friday's game at MetLife Stadium against the Giants. He was present for meetings, a walk through, and the pre-game meal Friday, but was a no-show come game time. The Jets have not been able to speak with Patterson directly but his agent, Dre...
Report: Jets Sad That Backup Michael Vick's Cool With Being Backup
Today's Michael Vick is obviously not 2006 Michael Vick, but the Jets picked him up in an attempt to push second-year quarterback Geno Smith to suck less. Then, they told Vick they were going with Smith, barring a disaster. Believe it or not, the 34-year-old Vick accepted that he'd be a backup, and ...
Cubs Ground Crew Struggles To Get Tarp On Field, Gets Booed
Heavy rain started falling in the bottom of the fifth at Wrigley tonight and, just like the New York crew at Yankee Stadium a few weeks ago, the Chicago grounds crew struggggggled to get the tarp on the field. As you can see, this thing was botched from Jump Street and it only got worse with hug...
Crazy Racist Alaskan Lady Goes On Amazing Racist Roadrage Rant
Damn, lady, this is one fine-ass racist run you went on here. Started off strong with, "If I had a gun, I would shoot you dead. ... I'm going to kill your kids and your goddamn mother. I've got people who will do it," and rolled right into Muslims blowing up school bus children because they're athei...
Lolo Jones Ends Track Season, Pledges To Focus On Netflix
Lolo Jones, the world's second-most-famous track athlete, has called it a season despite three remaining meets left in the IAAF Diamond League, she announced today via Facebook. ...
Something Disgusting Happened In Ashley Young's Mouth
It's hard to say exactly what this is that flies directly into Ashley Young's mouth—many on Twitter say it's bird shit, which should make you want to eat Clorox wipes for a week—but even if it's just human spit, it's equal parts amazing and gross. ...
The Jets Took Fireman Ed Out To Lunch And Tried To Woo Him Back
Jets superfan Fireman Ed retired from the superfan game a few years ago, so now he's just Fireman Ed. Actually, he's retired from firefighting, too, so he's just Ed Anzalone. Anyway, the New York Jets are so desperate for that superfan-led J-E-T-S chant that they tried to wine and dine Ed back into ...