los Page 262 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Arms Race Gets Second and Larger Arm
Michael Bertin writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin Meet the new world power in soccer, the United Arab Emirates. Actually as people, they suck at the game. The national side is currently 104th (out of 208) in FIFA's World Rankings. But the Emirates have something more important than athletic ...
No Way Will The Cubs Blow It This Time ... Uh Oh
Time to worry: When your team has lost four straight at home during the stretch run of the division race. Time to really worry: When your manager says "If he can pitch, he'll pitch. If he can't, we'll put Sean Marshall in the rotation." Those words of wisdom were spoken by Lou Piniella, after Carlos...
Do Not Mock The Power Of The Taco
In case you haven't noticed, we're into September and the Tampa Bay Rays are still in first place in the AL East. This is no longer a joke, people; they could actually win this thing. The Red Sox relegated to the wild card race? The Yankees, out of the playoffs entirely? How did this happen? The Ray...
A Tale of Two Bullpens
•Back Away From the Ledge, Mets Fans: In all fairness, you can't expect a major league bullpen to hold a one-run lead for almost three whole innings. The Mets relievers wasted another strong performance by starter Mike Pelfrey, as Aaron Heilman walked in the game-winning run in the bottom of the nin...
Get Ready For The Los Angeles Saints In 2009...Maybe?
An unidentified partner of the man trying to bring the NFL back to Los Angeles told a local paper earlier in the week that he had "no doubt" that the city would be home to a pro team in 2009. And we report that with all apologies to USC. Of course, no team has been identified by the league (or anyon...
Mets Solidify Position for Upcoming September Collapse
Forgive New York fans for celebrating just a bit harder than usual last night. After all, they are coming off a big win on the last Friday before the month-that-shall-not-be-named. Carlos Beltran's dramatic grand slam put his team up by three on the Marlins heading into the bottom of the ninth. The ...
They Must Be Coming By Sea
David Hirshey Michael Bertin writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. Arsene Wenger would have made a good captain for the Titanic. That has less to do with any nautical skills that he may or may not have, than it does with hubris. This is an Arsenal side he has claimed in print has the ability ...
Sunday Night Baseball: Dodgers-Phillies
Philadelphia and Los Angeles have good chances at winning their divisions. Jon Miller and Joe Morgan have good chances at mentioning baseball players from the 80s we never heard of, but should be in the Hall of Fame. Your pitchers: Hiroki Kuroda for the Avoiders, and Joe Blanton for the Philbins. If...
City Wins Big Despite Losing Richards, Deco Is the Difference For Chelsea
Manchester City's 3-0 drubbing of woeful West Ham was marred early in the second half when Micah Richards went down with a head injury after a midair collision with new teammate Tal Ben Haim. City's young star was treated by medical personnel on the pitch before being taken away on a stretcher. Aft...
MLB Closer: Do Not Taunt Surly Third-Place Kitty
Zach Miner of Los Tigres Detroit committed regicide on the monarchs from Missouri, allowing only three singles in seven innings on the way to a 4-0 victory in Kansas City last night. How could he get away with such domination on a major league franchise while only striking out three? How could he kn...
NFL Closer: John McCain Taught Matt Leinart All He Knows About Football
Unless Steve Young took the wrong bridge out of San Francisco last night, there were no known professional-level quarterbacks in the city of Oakland, CA, last night. Normally, this would not be cause for concern, but an NFL preseason contest took place in Oakland Coliseum at the same time. (Arizona ...
The Spurs Could Really Use a Hug Right Now
Tottenham took to the pitch this morning without the services of Dimitar Berbatov for the second straight week, and once again they failed to secure a single point. The frustrated Bulgarian striker wasn't even in attendance to watch his (soon to be former) teammates drop a 2-1 decision against Sund...
MLB Closer: The Girl with the Strong Arm
Neal Cotts loves The Dead Milkmen. Or so we assume. After all, he's a rural boy from a small town born between 27 years and 36 years ago. Also, he gave up a grand slam to Willie F. Harris in the fifth inning at Wrigley Field yesterday afternoon, tossing Jason Marquis under the El and leaving the Was...
Stop Us If You've Heard This One Before
David Hirshey Michael Bertin writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. If the season were to end today Stupid Fucking Bolton would be going to the Champions League. A corner of the universe just started to fold in on itself simply because that sentence was typed. If... If my aunt had a penis she'd...
The Manny Wigs Are Here; Get 'Em While They Last
Now available at the Dodgers Pro Shop, finally; Manny Ramirez dreadlock wigs. The Dodgers were quite crafty with the release of this item; they're here just in time for back-to-school shopping. Backpack? Check. Binder? Check. Manny wig? Si! If the team wants to have any hope of outbidding the Yankee...
This Could Be It For Tom Glavine
Tom Glavine is out for the season. Dude tore up some ligaments in his elbow and says he won't come back if he has to get that ligament completely replaced. The 42-year-old went back to the Braves, turning down more money from the Mets to play where he had kept his offseason home. But he hasn't play...
Welcome to England, Monsieur Nasri
The English Premier League's new season is officially underway, and newcomer Samir Nasri has already made his mark with Arsenal. The dynamic young Frenchman scored the Gunners lone goal in this morning's (lunchtime over there) first match against newly promoted West Bromwich Albion. Arsenal dominat...
Daryle Ward Will Eat Your Children In Broad Daylight
The Chicago Cubs have just won their ninth straight game. In related news, Hell has frozen over, pigs are flying, gas is now 75 cents a gallon, and Andy Dick just had sex with a girl. This wild chain reaction began when Ward, in the midst of an 0-for-13 slump, hit a three-run homer in the ninth to p...
Michael Bertin Is Your New Closer
Unfortunately, we could not wrestle away previous soccer mom David Hirshey from his other "job" even though we offered him a drum full of mustache balm and unreleased nude photos of Pele to continue with us. The man simply wouldn't budge. No fear, though, because your weekly footie fix will be fille...
The Dread Lock Decision: Manny Complies With Haircut Edict; Barely
Manny Ramirez finally got a haircut on Thursday — as you can see he's practically bald — and the results were predictable. Apparently he angered Jobu, going 0-for-3 against the Phillies. But thanks to the mojo of the Joe Beimel bobblehead, the Dodgers still won, 3-1, to sweep the four-game series an...