NFL Closer: John McCain Taught Matt Leinart All He Knows About Football

Unless Steve Young took the wrong bridge out of San Francisco last night, there were no known professional-level quarterbacks in the city of Oakland, CA, last night. Normally, this would not be cause for concern, but an NFL preseason contest took place in Oakland Coliseum at the same time. (Arizona won 24-0. We're not sure why this matters, but completists in the audience should be sated.) Matt Leinart threw three interceptions, JaMarcus Russell showed little familiarity with the needs of the position, and Kurt Warner is still Kurt Warner. But hey, no worries; the passing game's passé; running's in with the kids! • Happy feet good; happy hands bad: In running news, Rashard Mendenhall fumbled twice (I-L-L! Where's-the-ball?) and Willie Parker raced out for 18 yards in 10 carries, but jigglin' Jeff Reed booted four balls through upright stanchions for a Steelers 12-10 victory over the Vikings. Guess which of them was most winded after the game? “ I’m pretty drained,” said our gutsy kicking friend. No concern, though... defense is the new offense, right? • Favre's knees are fine, thanks for asking: In defensive news, Osi Umenyiora's life will focus on the condition of his left knee for the foreseeable future as he left Giants and/or Jets Stadium after the balky joint locked up in the Giants-Jets tilt. Favre and Manning did well enough in the Jets' 10-7 victory, but New York can settle in for OsiWatch 2008 for the next few days. Don't be surprised if The Weather Channel gets confused and positions a reporter in a windbreaker outside the Giants' practice facility. (OhandtheRedskinslost47-3andJasonTaylorishurtpleasenotinthefaceOverlordKOGOD)