masturbation Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
<em>Sports Illustrated</em> Goes Long On The Quarterback Who Couldn't
A 15,000-word piece about Tim Tebow is such a self-evidently bad idea that you would assume, not having read it, that this Sports Illustrated #longform offers something special to justify its claims on the time and attention of readers: fresh reporting, uniquely elegant writing, original ideas....
How To Jerk Off In A War Zone: Servicemembers Weigh In
Last week, we published a military doctor's very useful field guide to masturbating while on active duty. Unsurprisingly, it elicited plenty of comment on the topic from experienced servicepeople, some of which we have collected for your enjoyment. Got anything to add? Leave a comment in the discus...
The Coming War: A Military Doctor's Field Guide To Masturbating In Afghanistan
The past decade of combat operations in Iraq and Afghanistan has given military physicians such as myself the important opportunity to gather unprecedented data on some of our most pressing medical issues. This data set has spurred advances in the care of trauma, hemorrhagic shock, traumatic brain i...
Who Is The Most Masturbated-To Woman In History?
I just recently got a Christmas card from Drew and his family and I have to say: Is there any bigger fucking waste of time, energy, and paper than a Christmas card? I understand why people used to do it before Facebook existed, but currently, if someone has a baby, not a day goes by that a photo of ...
Sleeping Female Croatian Volleyball Player Robbed By Masturbating Man
The Croatian women's national volleyball team was recently in the town of Rovinj for a European championship qualifier. Mateja Rajkovic, one of the players, says a man broke into her bungalow and robbed her while she slept. The man made off with 50 euros, but according to Rajkovic, he also made off ...
We Have A New Favorite Tennis Player: Jack Sock
This morning, Harvey Araton of The New York Times introduced the world to a U.S. Open qualifier named Jack Sock. Here's a passage that apparently posed no problem for any copy editors:...
Reader Robert "Beats Off" To This Czech Woman And Would Appreciate It If You Did, Too
We get tips. Lots of tips. And, don't get me wrong, they're the backbone of this site. But sometimes these tips reveal personal details about our readers. Like flicky Robert, who shared his feelings about Zuzana, this intimidatingly vascular woman in the pink tanktop....
Man Masturbates In Toy Aisle To Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
According to police, William Black grabbed the SI mag at his local Walmart, walked to the toy aisle, rubbed one out, and wiped it on a plastic light saber. [The Smoking Gun]...
Poor Chan Gailey Can't Even Get Respect From Closed Captioning
Chan Gailey made light of his under-the-radar status in the NFL's coaching mechanical horsey ride, but it appears the TV robot felt obligated to add a little more pizazz to the Bills' humdrum choice....
The Deadspin Polygraph Test! Will Leitch!
Welcome to the Deadspin Polygraph Test, where I choose a random person in the sports world and subject them to a series of embarrassing and deeply personal questions, almost all of which involve sex or poop. They can only answer yes or no. Now, I don’t posses an actual polygraph machine here. So I’...
Yeah, I Have A Hard Time Keeping My Eyes Open Too Ashley
Michael Bertin writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin. Liverpool fans must still be over the fucking moon today. A 1-0 win over Chelsea, giving their 86 game home winning streak the, well, 86, and moving atop the table. And I'm not not going to pee on the Reds' parade. I should if only because ...
Breaking: Athletes Also Like to Jack Off to Internet
ESPN reports on a dangerous new problem facing that country's footballers:...
Johnny Damon, Grabbing Himself And Having Sex
Johnny Damon beats off in centerfield. At least, I think that's what she's saying. And you know, she doesn't seem repulsed by the idea... not enough to follow Damon home and mess with his war veteran father, anyway....