men Page 332 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mizzou Will Join The SEC On Monday, According To SEC's Premature, Accidental Announcement
Missouri became will become the 14th member of the Southeastern Conference (SEC), according to an announcement posted from the future on the conference's website last night that was almost immediately removed....

How Boca Raton Lost Its All-Star Pro Soccer Team Without Even Trying
The Boca Raton magicJack should have been the most marketable franchise in Women's Professional Soccer. The squad, formerly the D.C.-based Washington Freedom, was bought before the 2011 season by millionaire Dan Borislow, who renamed it after his own telecom product and moved it near his Florida hom...

And Now A Live Chat About Comments, Chaos, And Anything Else You Have On Your Mind
Hey girls! So after yesterday's Ninja report, I thought it'd be a good idea to take some time to check in with you friendly, handsome commenters to see if there's anything else bothering you before real, actual change comes to this place (again) and drives you all away. I'm here to help. Or hurt. Bu...

The Big 12 Is Already Cheating On West Virginia With Louisville
So much for this. From The New York Times:...

A Word From Your Ninjas About The Scary Changes In The Comments Section
OK, we understand there is some anger and confusion about the changes in the comments section, and we want to take the time to explain it as best we can....

Penn Tries To Reconcile NCAA Tourney Tradition With Fact That They Don't Make The NCAA Tourney Anymore
Back in 1969, UPenn began "The Line." The day before season tickets would go on sale, thousands of students would camp out overnight in the Palestra to be first in line. On Friday night, for the 2011 edition of The Line, 50 fans showed....

West Virginia To The Big 12 Means The Big East Might Be Coming After Your Grade School
So much for all of that Big East solidarity talk in the wake of Pitt's and Syracuse's departures. Here it is one month later, and word is out that the Mountaineers have "applied and are accepted" as members of the Big 12. Pete Thamel of the New York Times played it straight by adding this: "The onl...

Seven-Time Ohio Columnist Of The Year Wonders If Maybe Students Didn't Enjoy Being Sexed By Their Teacher
Paul Daugherty, in addition to having a regular gig on SI.com, has been a sports columnist at the Cincinnati Enquirer for a long, long time. So long that they've given him a daily "write about whatever shit you want to" column, which appears to run with minimal editing....

Hanley Ramirez Loves Shopping For A Good Bargain
Reader Adam sent us this photo of him and Hanley Ramirez. They met at a Filene's Basement in Washington, D.C. last year. This is, of course, a perk of being in this line of work. You get to see photos people took with athletes they bumped into at discount department stores a year ago. Awesome....

A Lesson In Failed Woman Juggling
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Idiot Utah Sports Columnist More Or Less Calls Amar'e Stoudemire A Dumb Negro
Doug Robinson, the resident paste-eating troglodyte at the Deseret News, has gone and written a truly remarkable column this week....

Rick Pitino Uses Really Unfortunate Infidelity Metaphor
Rick Pitino's a New Yorker who made his bones in the Big East, so naturally he's upset about Syracuse's and Pittsburgh's ACC exodus. At Big East media days, he had some harsh words for the Judases:...

Josh Hamilton Uses Just For Men To Make Sure His 'Stache Is Not Trash
We're slightly baffled by the box of Just For Men hair color spotted in Josh Hamilton's locker by reader Patrick. (For the record, mustache & beard, medium brown.) Hamilton is usually clean shaven, so perhaps it's one of the scads of promotional products sent unbidden to athletes every day? Unless.....

Oh, Great, Now Conference USA Is Merging With The Mountain West To Form A 22-Team Conference
Because why the fuck not, at this point? [MWC]...

The Big East: Your New Home For Boise State, Central Florida, Navy, And Air Force Football!
Well, Colorado is east of Idaho, we suppose. And, hey, Thursday night blue turf on ESPN, within, like, a few years. That's something to look forward to, right? Maybe? Anyone? [USA Today]...

Cockblocked On A Boat!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

MLB Determined To Find Bastards Who Leaked Team Financial Documents To Us, AP
Aw hell. Just when it seemed like we were about to enjoy a brief drama-free existence in the internet universe, along comes this report from the New York Daily News that Major League Baseball has asked a judge to "help plug its leaks." You know, these leaks. ...

Crazed Fan Swarms Minnesota Lynx During Championship Parade In Pedestrian Mall
The Minnesota Lynx won the 2011 WNBA championship today, after defeating the Atlanta Dream, 73-67, for a three-game sweep in the finals. They were feted by a parade in downtown Minneapolis this afternoon: 15,000 fans came out to Nicollet Mall, and 4,500 more joined the team at the Target Center. All...

Mesut Özil Unleashes A Wicked Goal Against Belgium
Germany beat Belgium 3-1 today in Euro 2012 qualifiers. The first goal came from distance off the enchanted left foot of attacking midfielder Mesut Özil. In the replay, you may see a Belgian defender silently give thanks for being a flagpole too far to the right to block the shot....

BC Athletic Director: ESPN Is The Kindest, Bravest, Warmest, Most Wonderful Company I've Ever Known
Gene DeFilippo, addressing this: "I spoke inappropriately and erroneously regarding ESPN's role in conference expansion." [@PeteThamelNYT]...