mo Page 496 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Combat Doctor's Field Guide To Masturbating In Afghanistan
Nine real-life scenarios from the front lines, nine field-tested solutions, courtesy our friend "Dr. Watts," a military doctor who served with the Marines Corps infantry....
Race Fans Disapprove Of ESPN's Botching Of The Indy 500 Finish
ESPN on ABC's coverage of the thrilling final laps of yesterday's Indy 500 left many viewers upset, as Bristol's repeated coverage of the race leaders' significant others battled that of the actual racing. Here's a comparison of what ESPN aired versus video from the international feed....
"I Heard Myself Say Out Loud, 'Someone Needs To Smoke That Little Girl'"
A Marine Corps medic in Afghanistan struggles to balance Hippocrates and the demands of war. You can find the full story below. An excerpt:...
Here Is Your Memorial Day Menu
So it's Memorial Day, a day designated by the federal government for inching glacially northward on I-95 with ten trillion other weekend beachgoers, cursing the day this humid blue turd congealed out of space-garbage in the orbit of a giant ignited fart, secretly desperate to return to the climate-c...
Jamaica Falters, U.S. Women Win World Relays 4x100
It always comes down to the baton pass. In 2008, the U.S. men and women were the heavy Olympic favorites in the 4x100 meter relay. Then both teams dropped batons, disqualifying themselves and becoming a worldwide cautionary tale: relays are made by good teams, not great individuals....
ABC/Disney Previews Indy 500 With Creepy BDSM/Milk-Themed Intro
We're gonna assume this is some kind of viral marketing by dairy farmers, but after watching this I think I'm switching to Silk for good....
Slash Played The National Anthem Before Blackhawks-Kings Game 3
What better way to honor our fallen troops this Memorial Day weekend than to have Slash shred a rendition of The Star-Spangled-Banner?...
Sergio Ramos Header In 93rd Minute Forces Extra Time At UCL Final
The UEFA Champions League final in Lisbon is headed to extra time after Sergio Ramos's header found the back of the net in the 93rd minute to equalize the score at 1-1....
Gael Monfils And Laurent Lokoli Engage In Dance-Off Before French Open
The French Open Kids' Day featured tennis players Gael Monfils and Laurent Lokoli stealing the show for a few minutes. It was an old-fashioned dance-off, with the clay court as the stage....
BBC Announcer Goes Bonkers As QPR Scores 90th-Minute Winner In Play-Off
Queens Park Rangers is returning to the Premiership after Bobby Zamora's last-minute goal dashed Derby County dreams and sent BBC Radio London announcer Phil Parry into heart palpitations....
Ray Rice: "Sometimes In Life, You Will Get Knocked Down"
Ray Rice, who won't see a day in jail for (allegedly) knocking the shit out of his then-fiancée in a casino elevator, held one of the most insanely un-self-aware press conferences in football history today. A sampling:...
Everything is happening: Brandon Prust will have his over-the-phone DOPS hearing today, Derek Stepan is out indefinitely after undergoing surgery for a broken jaw, and now Daniel Carcillo has received a 10-game suspension for physically abusing an official. No matter Prust's suspension, I'd say the ...
Boston Hockey Twitter: Not As Racist As Made Out To Be
After Montreal's P.K. Subban scored to beat Boston in game one of their series, there were two inescapable talking points: That the word "nigger" was trending in Boston (this was quickly debunked) and there had been 17,000 tweets containing the slur and Subban's name. Would it change your impression...
The Habs' Luck Is Real, And It's Spectacular
The Canadiens' 3-2 overtime victory in New York puts them right back in this series, a close-fought game that devolved into an absolutely wild final five minutes or so. Three goals in short succession sent it to OT then decided it—punch, counterpunch, sucker punch—and all three were deflections that...
Daniel Carcillo Gets Game Misconduct For Lashing Out At Linesman
Rangers forward Daniel Carcillo took an early exit from Game 3 after hitting linesman Scott Driscoll as Driscoll tried to pull him away from a fight....
A Tolerable Adam Sandler Movie! <em>Blended</em>, Reviewed.
In the late '90s, when Adam Sandler decided to transition from imbecile par excellence to romantic lead, he teamed up with Drew Barrymore to make The Wedding Singer, a very silly and very lovable '80s comedy that brought a softer, more human side to his Happy Gilmore/Billy Madison persona. That fi...
Peak Jackie Chan: The Intoxicating Joys Of <em>The Legend Of Drunken Master</em>
Netflix Instant doesn't have to feel like a depleted Blockbuster in 1990, where you spend half an hour browsing hopeless straight-to-video thrillers before saying "fuck it" and loading up another Archer. Streaming services can be an absolute treasure trove, particularly if you like action movies, an...
David Moyes Apparently Got In A Bar Fight
In what must be a classic example of taking your problems out on the wrong people, former Manchester United manager David Moyes is accused of assaulting a man at a bar last night....