mo Page 780 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Are Not Going To Make A Viagra Joke, And Frankly, You Shouldn't Either
Palmeiro Docked 10 Days For Steroids [ESPN]...

Bill Simmons Nails Boston Smugness Cold
The first sentence of Our Boy Bill Simmons' column this week is a perfect illustration of why everyone in the sports world wants to strangle everyone from Boston:...

More Fun With Joe Morgan
Internet baseball fans never tired of making fun of ESPN baseball analyst Joe Morgan, and the crazy kids at Large Regular are no different. They offer up a mock conversation with Morgan about the release of the new Harry Potter book, clearly playing around with his noted "I haven't read Moneyball"...

Simmons Impersonators Getting Downright Creepy
The folks at Yard Work are getting so good at impersonating ESPN columnists that, honestly, you just can't tell the difference anymore....

The Bill Simmons Backlash Continues
We thought we were the only ones making fun of ESPN bad boy Bill Simmons, but apparently not: The Sports Frog weighs in with a devastating missive at Big Bill's column about Clippers forward Bobby Simmons that ran yesterday....

Bill Simmons Translator: Bill Swoons, Fawns
Whoa! A bonus Bill Simmons column, from the magazine this time. It's all Bill, all the time over here today; we're like The Sports Gal today, except we don't have to go to sleep wondering if we're gonna have to wake up in the middle of the night to take care of one of Bill's nosebleeds. It's Bill ...

More Cartoon Hilarity From Bill Simmons
Sometimes we wonder if our boy Bill writes the scripts for these things on a cocktail napkin while watching mid-'70s Celtics highlights on a treadmill. Here's this week's cartoon fun:...

It's Slap Joe Morgan Day!
ESPN analyst Joe Morgan has long been an object of derision among computer nerd baseball analysts, particularly in the online community, where his chat sessions have become legendary (he remains confused about who actually wrote "Moneyball"). In a pretty damning profile in San Francisco Weekly, Mo...

Bill Simmons Picks His Own Greatest Hits
With tonight's NBA Draft just about five hours away, our main man Bill Simmons clocks in with the50 greatest moments in NBA Draft history. Of course, that's not really what it is; what it really is is a collection of Bill's favorite one-liners from all his draft diaries. One imagines Bill staying...

OK, Sometimes Peter Gammons Freaks Us Out A Little
From today's Peter Gammons column:...

The Bizarro Bill Simmons
From the great Yard Work satirical blog, here's an imaginary (but just barely) selection from Bill Simmons' mailbag:...

Bill Simmons Translator: We Were Little, Swarthy People. No, Really
ESPN Page 2 columnist/national movement Bill Simmons has filed an unusually brief missive about last night's Game 7. You know what that means: It's time for The Bill Simmons Translator!...

Bill Simmons Translator: He Loved "The The!"
Now that ESPN Serious Journalist Bill Simmons has gotten pretty much every single prediction of the NBA Finals completely wrong, we thought we'd check in with him after last night's Game 6 with ... yes ... The Bill Simmons Translator!...

Another Bill Simmons Cartoon: Cell Phone
Yay! This Week's "Episode:" "Cell Phone"...

Tampa Does What It Can To Please Bill Simmons
In a surprise announcement yesterday, the city of Tampa was awarded the Super Bowl in 2009. In a nod to the constant, insufferable bitching by everybody's favorite Interweb columnist, SportsFrog.com points out a key factor in the decision:...

Bill Simmons Changes Format For 5,234th Time
You know what we admire about Bill Simmons? His rock-solid consistency. Once again, Bill is explaining to us again why his site updates with the regularity of a malfunctioning strobe light. Supposedly — and this was a little confusing — Bill's going to post short items on More Cowbell (exactly th...

New Bill Simmons Cartoon Arrives; Oscar In The Mail
The moment you've all been waiting in lines for months for is here: "Season Two" of the Bill Simmons cartoons!...

Your Bill Simmons Translator
It's that time of day: The Bill Simmons Translator! The highlights of today's More Cowbell column:...

What's Bill's Cartoon About?
Tomorrow is the day we have all been waiting for: A new Bill Simmons cartoon! It has been nearly three months since we last saw the little animated Bill — save that weird scary one at the top of his page that blinks — and, hey, who hasn't missed them?...

Welcome Back, Bill!
Bill Simmons has returned, with, of course, another excuse. Posting anothershambling "More Cowbell" column (a name that had gotten old before it even started), Big Bill apologizes, saying that he's still deep in edits on his book that we've already read. Other vintage Bill highlights, with what he's...