ness Page 75 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

FiveFingers Maker Will Pay Millions To Suckers Who Bought Its Shoes
The favorite toe-shoe of vegan restaurant servers and 55-year-old men with ponytails has settled a class action lawsuit brought against it by what sounds like every person who ever wore its foot-condoms....

Bernard Pollard Promises The Titans Will Suck Less Butt This Season
Athletes tend to fall back on weasel words to avoid saying their team isn't very good. "We didn't gel as a unit." "The breaks didn't go our way." "We weren't able to sustain momentum." Titans safety Bernard Pollard prefers to cut to the chase....

We Should All Aspire To Have A LinkedIn Profile Like Shaq's
No, this is not fake. Our pals at Slate have confirmed that Shaq's LinkedIn profile does indeed list the NBA legend's occupation as "Owner, a lot of companies." God bless you, Shaq....

Fitness Is Not A Computer
Here is what you need in order to work out: your own body, something to wear, at least 64 cubic feet of space (though less will do in a pinch). Here is what you do not need: a computer on your wrist. Particularly not if that computer is trying to snitch on you. ...

Cuonzo Martin Leaves Tennessee, And His Players Don't Sound Surprised
Cuonzo Martin took the Cal job today, after an up-and-down three years with Tennessee that saw his job security deteriorate even as he led the Volunteers to a Sweet 16 appearance. His players seem sorry to see him go, but don't sound shocked that he left....

Proof That America Fills Out March Madness Brackets Like Idiots
You're looking at a chart from Stephen Pettigrew's look at 11 million brackets yesterday. Pay special attention to the spike at 680 points, though. It's the strangest damn thing you'll see today. ...

What Was The Most Rewatched Moment Of The Final Four?
TiVo released a neat chart with the most rewatched moments from this year's Final Four. (Apparently, they have the ability to keep track of this.) The top three are from the championship game, naturally....

One Shitty Moment: March Madness's Saddest Players (And Drake)
Just compelling as the faces of the victors in the NCAA tournament are the reactions of those who came up short. I say reactions instead of faces since most of the time, the losers try to hide their faces with their hands, jerseys, towels—whatever's available. Here are the best pictures of those sad...

HYFR: A Gallery Of March Madness's Happiest Players (And Drake)
Unless your team was on the losing side or you lack basic human empathy, seeing the elated faces of winning NCAA tournament kids is always a treat. Here, we've compiled the best of those celebratory pictures:...


How A Clever Kansas Play Went Viral And Took Over College Basketball
Kansas was on the ropes. Down five against Stanford with 21.5 seconds remaining, it appeared the Jayhawks would fail to make the second weekend of the NCAA tournament for the fourth time under coach Bill Self. This being March, though, a month where games aren't over until there has been a buzzer be...

UConn RA Will Not Tolerate Basketball Excitement On His Floor
Via Connecticut student Mike Mancini, what's purported to be an email some UConn students received from their floor's resident assistant ahead of tonight's National Championship game:...

The Fall Of Kevin Mackey, The NCAA Tournament's Junkie Cinderella
Originally published in the December 1992 edition of GQ. Reprinted with the author's permission. Annotations from the author (as told to Alex Belth) appear throughout the story....

What Will Aaron Harrison Do Tonight?
Kentucky guard Aaron Harrison has hit clutch shots in the Wildcats' last three games to help deliver them to tonight's national championship bout against UConn. The last two came in the games' final seconds, and bore such a remarkable similarity that we made a composite of them in the GIF you see he...

Dumb Shining Moment: Your 2014 NCAA Tournament Lowlight Reel
Fans around the country flock to their TVs for March Madness, a time when college basketball players inspire us with their NCAA Tournament heroics. Plenty of dumb things happen in between all those buzzer-beaters and spectacular dunks, though. This video features those dumb things....

Two Hours Of The Lexington Police Scanner After UK Wins, Set To Music
Kentucky's thrilling wins over Louisville, Michigan, and Wisconsin have delivered the Wildcats to tomorrow's NCAA national championship. They've also prompted UK students to engage in, ah, "civil disobedience."...

<em>SNL</em> Presents: "NCAA Tournament: Best Of The White Guys"
We only have one game left in this year's NCAA Tournament, and NBC gave those willing to suffer through an entire Saturday Night Live episode one bonus highlight reel, in an infomercial for "NCAA Tournament: Best Of The White Guys."...

Alex Poythress Gets Leg Tangled Up In Post-Game Celebration
Alex Poythress got his leg caught at the bottom of the post-game celebration on the court following Kentucky's win over Wisconsin. It looked kind of scary, what with him being stuck under his entire team, but hopefully it's a case of things looking worse than they actually are. ...

