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Texas News Station Tweets Photos Of Some Big Ol' Dicks [NSFW]
@TWCNewsAustin attempted to give its 32,000 Twitter followers a traffic update last night, something that the rush-hour commuters of Austin were surely eager for. Instead, those commuters got an eye full of dick....

Report: N.J. High School Football Players Sexually Assaulted Freshmen
Sayreville (N.J.) Superintendent of Schools Richard Labbe cancelled Sayreville War Memorial High School's football season Monday amid claims of hazing, though the details were unknown. But a parent of a Sayreville player talked to NJ.com today, and what happened sounds horrific and inhumane....

Did Everyone Know That Cole Aldrich Has A Gross Fake Tooth?
I did not know about this fake-tooth situation, and I find it a bit unsettling that he can remove it and pop it back in so quickly. It's even worse when you incorporate sound:...

Jaromir Jagr Remembers His Very First Goal, And His Beautiful Mullet
Maybe it's Jaromir Jagr's last season; maybe not, since he did put up 67 points for the Devils last year. But just on the chance that this'll be his last run, let's not wait for the silver anniversary. It was 24 years ago today that a bemulleted Penguins rookie scored his first NHL goal....

Report: Geno Smith Missed A Meeting Because Of A Dumb Team Policy
The New York Jets got stomped to hell by the San Diego Chargers yesterday, and the 31-0 blowout was so bad that Jets starting quarterback Geno Smith was yanked before the start of the second half. Smith's day got even more embarrassing after the game, a report claimed that he'd missed a team meeting...

Who Gets To Spike The Football?
When the Patriots are doing well, Tom Brady doesn't get mad, and instead does fun stuff like play hot potato with Julian Edelman before spiking the ball....

Watch Newly Discovered Footage Of D.C.'s 1924 World Series Walk-Off Win
It is, the Library of Congress swears, entirely coincidence that four minutes of footage from the 1924 World Series—pitting the Senators against the Giants—was recently rediscovered just in time for the Nationals to take on the Giants in this year's NLDS. ...

Larry Donnell Lost In Fantasy Football Because He Didn't Start Himself
Nobody ever wants to hear someone complain about their fantasy team, but we can give Giants tight end Larry Donnell a pass here, since this particular gripe involves him boning himself out of a victory....

Antrel Rolle: Prince Amukamara Is Good Now Because He's Gettin' Laid
Giants cornerback Prince Amukamara was a first-round pick in the 2011 draft, and hasn't exactly lived up to the high expectations that were set for him in the three years since. But so far this season, Amukamara has been playing well—he's got two picks and seven passes defended through the first fou...

Report: Aaron Dobson Benched After He "Mouthed Off" To Josh McDaniels
The fact that second-year WR Aaron Dobson has suited up just once this season is extra-weird in light of the Patriots being woefully short on receivers. A Boston Globe report today may answer that question; it says Dobson has been benched the last two weeks because he's run afoul of offensive coordi...

Bill Belichick Really Just Wants To Talk About Cincinnati
Bill Belichick was in excellent press-conference form two days after the Chiefs demolished the Patriots. Reporters kept asking him about the Patriots' roster, Tom Brady's age, and concerns for the team's current state. Belichick wasn't interesting in talking about anything else but Sunday night's ...

Aaron Hernandez's Lawyers Want His Trial Moved From "Biased" Boston Area
Aaron Hernandez appeared in a Bristol County court yesterday, as his lawyers filed a motion requesting that one of his murder trials be moved "outside the boundaries of the Boston media market." Their reasoning includes a poll finding that most people in Bristol County already think he's guilty....

Somebody Deck This Guy
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Chiefs Fan Celebrates By Faux-Face-Fucking Nearby Patriots Fan
As the Chiefs drubbed the Patriots last night, Grant Hinkle, a poker player and Kansas City fan, rubbed it in the face of a Pats fan sitting next to him. He had a series of celebrations planned out....

Don't Ask Bill Belichick If It's Time To Think About His Quarterbacks
The Patriots were bad, bad, bad last night, getting beaten soundly on both sides of the ball in a 41-14 road thumping at the hands of the Chiefs. But a good part of the attention is naturally going to settle on Tom Brady, who's been so consistently great over the course of his career that this sea...

TGI Fridays Is Breaking Up With Its Own Restaurants
Time was, the name "TGI Fridays" used to goddamn mean something. Kitsch-bedecked walls. Dim lighting. Aerosmith music. Reheated trashfood slathered in bourbon-flavored pancake syrup. The nagging sense that this interstate off-ramp gas-'n'-grub strip was the neon lure dangling before the yawni...

As Fans Chant For Vick, Rex Ryan Backs Geno Smith
Things for the Jets are probably going to get worse before they get better—the Chargers, Broncos, and Patriots are up next on the schedule—but after another shaky outing, Geno Smith got an immediate and unequivocal vote of confidence from his coach....
