nf Page 821 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Gunnin' For That #1 Spot
You know, I wish that there was some way that I could be outside playin' basketball in the rain and not get wet. Now wouldn't that be great, hmm?...
The Patriots Win Ugly As Tom Brady Looks Ready To Murder His Receivers
Last night's 13 New England win over the Jets was a godsend for fans of frustrated and furious Tom Brady reaction images. Fans of football? Not so much. ...
Drop City: Your Patriots-Jets GIF Roundup
Patriots 13, Jets 10: The game was ugly before the rain. It became more difficult to watch once it started pouring. Here are the highlights to prove that this awful thing existed....
NFL Network Announcer With Hot Mic Has To Go To "Little Boys' Room"
Right before the beginning of Patriots-Jets, a hot mic caught an NFL Network announcer asking if he'd have enough time to go to the "little boys' room." Sometimes, a bladder just can't stop for football....
Giants Player Accused Of Faking Injury Placed On Season-Ending IR
The Giants are really taking this ruse to slow down the Cowboys offense seriously....
Is The NFL Blacklisting Kerry Rhodes?
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....
The Texans Got Old Man Ed Reed A Walker For His Birthday
Ed Reed turned 35 yesterday. His new teammates in Houston recognized the occasion by presenting him with a Hall of Fame jacket cake, but free safety Danieal Manning also gave Reed this platinum walker as a gag. Reed has yet to play this season because of a hip injury. No word on whether the Texans b...
Seahawks Fans Will Attempt To Set The World Record For Crowd Noise
On Sunday night, presumably during the 49ers' first offensive series, the fans at CenturyLink Field will attempt to set a Guinness World Record for the loudest crowd roar. It will not be an easy task....
Typewriter Love
I know writers who still use a typewriter. One close pal whose neighborhood experiences power outages several times a year recently wrote a story on a portable. He wanted to get comfortable with it case he loses power and can't use his electric machine. ...
Steve Mason's Goalie Mask Features Zombified American Patriots
So this is a thing. It's...patriotic?...
More Illustrated NFL Playbook Fun
When we did the Bills edition of Why Your Team Sucks, reader Matt E. sent in a phony drawing of the team's playbook that was so awesome, we asked him to do a few more of them. Here now are the playbooks of five more NFL teams, as designed by Matt:...
Reports: Buccaneers Already A Dysfunctional Shitshow
The NFL season hasn't truly started until one team melts down, revealing locker room divisions via anonymous leaks. And who better than the underachieving Buccaneers, with a hardass college coach and a disappointing young QB with a notoriously bad relationship? ...
Report: Mark Sanchez Likely To Have Season-Ending Surgery
Well, that'll do Mark. That'll do. Mere days after SportsCenter put to rest what will undoubtedly be in the first line of his obituary, Mark Sanchez's season is done. According to Chris Mortensen, Dr. James Andrews has determined that Sanchez has a "labral tear in his right shoulder." Sanchez still ...
All The NFL TV Themes, On Piano
All the classics: Fox, NBC, CBS, and ESPN. Turns out you like sonatas, huh?...
Report: NFL Agents Funneled Money To College Players
A big Yahoo report dropped today, presumably to ride/torpedo the momentum of SI's flawed Oklahoma State exposé. It claims that NFL agents and financial advisers funneled tens of thousands of dollars to five college players, including Alabama tackle D.J. Fluker....
Former Chiefs Coach Todd Haley Autographs Bar Napkin: "Chiefs Suck!!"
A reader named Joe sent this our way. It's an autograph he got on a bar napkin from Steelers offensive coordinator Todd Haley. Joe explained what happened in an email. This is that story, unedited. Be warned: There are no heroes here. There's a guy being a dick to Haley, and Haley being a dick right...
Sadsack Former NFL Player Punked—Twice—By Drunken Comedians
As with all great ideas, the initial plan was hatched by a couple of drunk guys at a bar who had nothing better to do....
Texans Fan Drinks Own Piss In Irrational Display Of Loyalty
There are many baffling things about this video of a Texans fan drinking his own urine in the wake of his team's comeback performance against the Chargers late Monday night. Why does he combine jars of warm urine and cold urine? Also, why the hell is he drinking his own piss? Here he is, in his own...
Chargers Greet Fans At Stadium With Big Ol' Typo
Via For the Win, this was a sign outside Qualcomm Stadium last night. Coughing up a three-touchdown lead in the second half wasn't the only weclome the Chargers would extend to their fans....
Ndamukong Suh Gets Largest Fine For On-Field Incident In NFL History
Suh is out $100,000 for this low block on Vikings center John Sullivan. It's a record-setter, with a few caveats....