night Page 341 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
About Last Night ...
What you missed while writing a musical based on the movie "Fargo" ... • NFL: Patriots give Raiders the ol' Three Stooges eye poke. • MLB: Pitcher Kyle Lohse takes a bat to Twins' locker room, providing yet another reason to dump the designated hitter. • MLB: Coco Crisp home run helps Indians move i...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as Gilligan ascends to Sitcom Heaven ... • Your excuse to eat vast quantities of junk food is finally here: Raiders at Patriots kick off NFL season. • MLB: Angels at Red Sox. Converging fronts of negative mojo from Yankees, A's fans collide over Fenway, causing it to rain. • U.S. Open ...
Look Up "Class" in the Dictionary, You'll See a Picture of Larry King
From the Reasons Radio Will Never Die department, it appears that Westwood One Radio is considering hiring Larry King to appear on its Monday Night Football radio broadcasts this year. This is the best news we have heard in months; we still haven't quite recovered SI.com canned his batshit nuts "S...
About Last Night ...
What you missed when TiVo finally gained consciousness and took total control ... • King of Queens: Agassi rallies in U.S. Open thriller — too bad you slept through it. • MLB: Mets beat Braves! ... Naw, we're just kidding, obviously. • World Cup qualifying: Shocking news involving Northern Ireland a...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Trying To Dislodge The Remote From The Dog ... • MLB: Rays at Yankees. Raise that threat level to red — Stenbrenner's about to blow. • That time you got comically tangled in the net should not detract from your enjoyment of the U.S. Open. • MLB: Mets at Braves. Because ESPN 2 cou...
About Last Night ...
Well, once again you've thrown a boot at the TV and pointed the remote at the cat ... • MLB: Pedro, Mets lose again, consider reality series. • MLB: Ortiz, you stud! Red Sox shock Angels. • Talk about steroids, ever take a close look at Kim Clijsters? Er, we mean, Venus ousted in U.S. Open semis....
About Last Night ...
• What you missed while shaving profanities onto your dog ... • Florida State beats Miami in football ... wait, that can't be right. • Jerry Rice decides to retire after Broncos clean out his locker, paint over his parking space and refuse to let him back into the building. • White Sox grind Curt Sc...
About Last Night ...
Why am I on the floor, surrounded by empty malt liquor cans? And why am I dressed as a bullfighter? Will someone please bring me up to speed? ... • Spurrier wins his debut as a Gamecocksman. • Aging pitcher Tony Danza gets the win as Angels somehow pull even with A's. • We don't want another Oswalt!...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as the price of gas exceeds the price of real estate ... • NFL: Giants at Patriots. It's the final exhibition game, so expect to see a lot of QB Jared Lorenzen. • College football: Central Florida Cannon Fodder at South Carolina Spurriers. • MLB: Tigers at White Sox. One of these teams...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while stuck firmly in the tire swing ... • MLB: Pedro tees 'em up, Phillies hit 'em out. Ah, that's the Mets we know. • A day after taking first batting practice, an exhausted Bonds takes a day off. • Marlins' Hermida peaks at 21; hits grand slam in first major league at-bat....
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch on your freshly looted high-definition TV ... • Boxing: Malcolm Tann vs. Derek Bryant heavyweight clinchfest. • MLB: Cardinals at Marlins. Do we feel Baseball Fever coming on? Nope, it's just the humidity. • U.S. Open Tennis. Because real sports get us too worked up....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while chasing ghosts with your three friends and a large Great Dane ... • MLB: A's win seventh straight, set stage for disappointing their fans once again in playoffs. • Roddick ousted in U.S. Open despite good looks. • WNBA Playoffs: Indiana Fever beat New York Liberty. Honestly, we...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch After You've Been Cut By The Denver Broncos ... • MLB: A's at Angels. Doesn't it seem that these teams play each other every day? • WNBA Playoffs. The excitement is palpable.* • U.S. Open tennis. Hey, why is the court blue? * = may not be true....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while calling for the assasination of Hugo Chavez ... • A's complete four-game sweep of Orioles. Strangely, Rafael Palmeiro seems weak and powerless lately for some reason. • Lions make it official, Have the word "hapless" painted on their helmets. • Agassi needs only 69 minutes to a...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch Instead Of Endless Hurricane News ... • Monday Night (Exhibition) Football: Rams at Lions. Remember when they wore the yellow sportscoats with the circle on the pockets? We're wearing one now. • MLB: Dodgers at Cubs. Look ... all the Chicago players are vomiting milk. • U.S. Open, Day ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while writing a musical based on the movie "Fargo" ... • Puberty — nature's steroids. Hawaii wins Little League World Series. • Speaking of steroids: Giambi's 7 RBI lift Yankees. • Danica Patrick proves that women drivers are just as capable as men when it comes to ... wait, she just...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Remembering That Tonight's Yet Another Anniversary Of A Breakup ... · Toronto Blue Jays at New York Yankees. You know how they used to say every egg you ate took five minutes off your life. We think Yankees losses are like that with George Steinbrenner, except it's like an hour. ...
About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Having Nightmares About That "Ranch Tooth" In The Wendy's Commercial ... · Yankees Secure Three-Way Wildcard Tie With Cleveland And Oakland. Somewhere, Woody Allen, Drew Carey and Hammer are in a furious battle. · Cardinals Knock Magic Number Down To 26. Tony LaRussa celebrates...
To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Trying To Get Out Of Painting ... · NFL: Dallas Cowboys at Seattle Seahawks: Enjoy a good quarter of people's names you barely recognize. But hey, John Madden's there. · MLB: Atlanta Braves at Chicago Cubs: It's always annoying when two SuperStation teams play each other. · Littl...
About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Telling Your Friends Not To Tell You What You Missed On "Six Feet Under" ... · 49ers Lineman Dies. Still confusion about cause. Sean Penn investigating. · Cards' Rolen To Miss Rest Of Season. Manager Tony LaRussa consoles himself by playing with puppies. · Eli Manning's Elbow "...