no Page 4642 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
If You Want To Play Soccer In Australia, Please Remove Your Genital Piercings First
The Old Hill Wanderers would like to clear up the specifics in an incident that led to a red card in a game against Swinburne on June 19:...
"This Is A Great Day For Canada's Football," Says Canada Coach After Dumb Luck Delays Elimination Three More Days
I'm not sure what lessons we can learn from the U-17 World Cup (I hope none, because the US lost to Uzbekistan last night), but English goaltending looks like it'll be hopeless for the next couple of decades....
Bryce Harper's Truck Is Exactly What You'd Expect Bryce Harper's Truck To Be
Your morning roundup for June 23, the day Whitey got popped. Image via Nats Enquirer....
Of Course The Pill-Popping Couple Charged With Four Pharmacy Murders Got Engaged At An Islanders Game
Per the New York Daily News, "A pill-popping, gun-loving Army vet and his junkie wife were charged Wednesday night in the cold-blooded massacre of four innocent people at a Long Island pharmacy. David Laffer and Melinda Brady were hauled out of his mother's Medford, L.I., house in handcuffs after h...
Somebody Tried To Sneak Past Security At Ryan Dunn's Memorial Service This Afternoon
No, the Westboro Baptist Church did not live up to its promise to "picket any public memorial/funeral held for [Ryan] Dunn, warning all not to make a mock of sin, & to fear and obey God" this afternoon. So, it can be argued that God does not, in fact, hate Jackass co-stars who drive really, really ...
This Has To Be Among The Funniest Things That Could Happen After Two Motorcycle Racers Crash
During a round of the Promosport Championship at Circuit de Nevers Magny-Cours in France, two riders crashed. Then, their rides decided to start mating. All that's missing is this....
Maybe It's A Siberian Mining-Country Custom For 7-Foot Boxers To Play Soccer In "An Exotic Charity Event"
There's so much going on in this news report from Siberia that it's easy to forget that a 7-foot heavyweight boxer (Nikolay Valuev) is trying to play soccer against a 5-foot-7 footballer (Andrey Arshavin) for charity. But that's what it is, and here's why:...
Here's Video Of The Adu-To-Donovan-To-Dempsey Goal That Advanced The U.S. To The Gold Cup Final
With a 1-0 victory over Panama, the U.S. men's soccer team will face the winner of the upcoming Mexico/Honduras match in Houston. Yes, the Adu in the headline is Freddy, that not-quite-prodigy who Coach Bob Bradley inserted into the match in the 66th minute. And yes, both Adu's and Donovan's passe...
Here's Video Of A Rapscallion Getting Face Planted On The Chinese Soccer Pitch He Defiled
This video is titled "China Football Special Pretending Footballer hitting Referee 追打裁判." What more needs to be said? Nothing, that's what....
Facing A Season With No NFL, <em>Madden</em>'s Ultimate Team Looks To The Legends
In any discussion of the greatest video game athletes, the Michael Vick of Madden NFL 2004 always makes the cut, and is usually the most recent name on the list. In the eight years since his appearance, sports simulations have fine-tuned their realism, closing the era of logic-defying performances b...
Your Gold Cup Semifinals Open Thread
It's Miércoles Gigante for los aficionados al fútbol in Houston tonight. First up, at 7 p.m., are the Americans who will try to avenge their June 11 upset loss to Panama. (They will.) Then, around 10 p.m., Mexico and Honduras will do battle for the right to advance to Saturday's Gold Cup finals ma...
Big Baby Is Struggling Through The Mirror Stage
The last time we checked in on Glen "Big Baby" Davis's development, he had lost track of himself — a classic case of méconnaisance, according to the limited memory I have of my intro to lit theory class. Now, as Danny Ainge declares his annual Boston Armageddon, Davis is confronting new trauma: what...
Jay Mohr And That Wretched "Like A G6" Band Will Perform At The NHL Awards Tonight, Everybody
Here is a list of the non-hockey stars—"some of the biggest names in Hollywood"—the NHL will have on hand tonight for its Las Vegas awards ceremony (7 p.m., Versus): Jon Hamm, Jerry Bruckheimer, Kevin Smith, Jennifer Beals. OK, if not quite A-list, definitely a list. Unfortunately, they accompany re...
Alert: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is $105.40
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....
Dumb Kid Tells Erin Andrews He's Going To Watch Her Video; Erin Andrews Tells Dumb Kid Off
Erin Andrews was on-site to cover the College World Series this week last year when a young autograph-seeker — a 12-year-old boy, according to this YouTube user — yelled out from the stands, "I'm gonna watch your video tomorrow!" Andrews looked directly at him and took a few steps forward and aske...
Jennie Finch Has Named Her Second Son Diesel Daigle
Finch, who is now retired but was once at the pinnacle of American softball, whatever that means, gave birth Sunday to eight-pound-two-ounce Diesel Dean Daigle. His older brother is named Ace Shane Daigle. Unconscionable....
Women Apparently Ruining Tennis With Their Excessive Grunting
Wimbledon, the sacred summertime rite celebrating the best and brightest of the tennis world, is once again upon us. But an ominous shadow darkens the crisp white shorts of the world's oldest tennis tournament, a stain that threatens to compromise the very integrity of not only tennis and sports com...
"Football Cops" With Peyton And Eli Manning Gets A Trailer
The photos we were sent from their Brooklyn shoot last month weren't misleading: the Manning Brothers play mustachioed maverick cops, armed only with their department-issue footballs....
Jack Warner Still Finds A Way To Get Paid By A Pathetic FIFA
The former FIFA VP always maintained his innocence in an election bribery scandal, swearing he was the target of an American witch hunt and "would be fully exonerated by any objective arbiter." So then why quit?...
The Brilliant Legal Mind Behind Mark Cuban's "Fuck You" Brief
We had to ask Mark Cuban for comment on today's legal filing, which consisted of a photo of the Mavericks celebrating a title. It's a dagger of a brief in the face of a suit accusing him of mismanaging the team, and it shuts down any comebacks. But Cuban deflected credit, telling us "it was all the ...