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"It Ain't Midnight Yet, Y'all!": The Vocal Cord-Shredding Announcer Is Delightfully Pleasant Via Email
The man behind that voice is Brian Snow and he is just about the nicest person with whom you will ever exchange emails. I had a chance to pick his brain about life, sports and how he keeps that voice in pitch perfect condition earlier this week. He cut his teeth in Chicago, having attended Fenger ...

495 Degrees Per Second: How Olympic Snowboarding Gold Medalist Kelly Clark Hucks Herself
Kelly Clark is the two-time defending X Games Gold Medalist in Women's Superpipe. She won gold in Salt Lake in '02 and bronze in Vancouver in 2010. At the 2011 X Games she became the first woman to land a 1080 in competition. The 30th U.S. Open Snowboarding Championships are going on right now, and ...

What If Dirk Nowitzki Was Missing A Chromosome And Lived In Phoenix?
Then he'd be like a lot of people living in Phoenix. (h/t Tom)...

"It Ain't Midnight Yet, Y'all!" High School Hoops Announcer Loses His Mind Yet Again
Bravo, Brian Snow. We didn't think there was any way you could top last Friday night's trachea-shredding performance, as the Marist RedHawks hit a late three to win the 4A regional final over Curie, 63-62. No, there was no way you could top that one. ...

High School Basketball Announcer Shreds Vocal Cords To Pieces In Bonkers Championship Game Call
Please enjoy this gentleman (?) calling a high school game in Chicago absolutely losing his shit in the final seconds. From what we can gather in all the madness, "Hot Rod" Williams drilled a three with 2.4 seconds left to take the lead. Then all hell broke loose in the announcer's booth. We truly...

Once Upon A Time, Charles Wang And Mike Milbury Royally Fucked Brian Burke
In 2001, the Canucks broke camp with two goaltenders: lifetime backup Dan Cloutier, and some dude. (Martin Brochu is about as "some dude" as a pro hockey player can be. In three non-consecutive NHL seasons, he got nine starts and didn't win a single one.) It was a personnel mystery that's endured to...

The Stages Of Internet Grief, As Applied To Whitney Houston's Death
0. Basic Twitter Check...

Did Dirk Nowitzki Shout "Fucking Faggot" After Hitting The Shot That Locked Up Tonight's Mavericks Win?
We're not entirely sure what it is Dirk Nowitzki shouts after hitting the dagger to ensure tonight's 97-94 double-OT win over Portland, but it sure looks like the same thing that earned Kobe Bryant an unprecedented $100,000 fine last season....

Knowshon Moreno Faces DUI Charges After Being Pulled Over In Bentley With "SAUCED" License Plate
Knowshon Moreno, the former Georgia star and current Broncos backup, was pulled over on suspicion of DUI February 1, last Wednesday....

Charles Barkley Can't Stop Talking About How Bad The NBA Stinks, Says It's Time To Consider Contraction
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Barkley also says that Dirk's best days are behind him....

Oh, This Is An Unfortunate Headline
Writes tipster Craig H., the orally committed Jack Snowball "is a high school kid so tread lightly."...

Shaun White Just Got The First Ever Perfect Score In SuperPipe—On His Victory Run
The classical ideal of perfection in athletics was defined by physical prowess displayed artistically. Modern tastes have added "swagger," "attitude," or perhaps just pride to that equation....

The Winter X Games Are Underway, Which Means Gnarly Snowmobile Crashes
Snowmobile Freestyle is perhaps the the most batshit insane of all professional sports in North America (snocross comes close) due simply to the ridiculous things competitors are able to tweak out of their 450-pound death machines. So here's 22-year-old Texan Colton Colten Moore failing spectacula...

Somebody Let Dirk Nowitzki Have The Microphone Again, And The Results Were <em>Äußerst Komisch</em>
Dirk Nowitzki's occasional stints as a TV analyst have led to catchphrases including "Take Dat With You," which became an unofficial rallying cry for last year's Mavericks. Dirk's grunts and ejaculations are funny, for sure—even if sometimes in a "does my breath smell funny" or "does my car sound ...

Dirk Nowitzki Hits Milestone In Mavericks Win, Derek Holland Hits This Spliff, Man
Your morning roundup for Jan. 14, the day we learned birds just want to have fun. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Bill Romanowski Remains A Terrifying Human Being
NFL commentator and sex advice columnist Bill Romanowski showed the same fire that made him one of the league's scariest players to face on the field in a live TV rant about perceived weaknesses in the Oakland Raiders organization....

Jared Allen Told Ray Edwards, "I'm Going To Punch You Square In Your Wiener, Dude" Before Punching Him Square In The Wiener
Maybe you've seen the video circulating this week that shows Minnesota's Jared Allen punching Atlanta's Ray Edwards directly in the crotch during the Falcons' 24-14 win in Week 12. If not, here it is, and here's Allen's frank explanation of the incident from today's episode of PFT Live:...

At Least We Have Fair Warning That There Are Nude Photos Of Shaun White In The Universe
There are reportedly nude photos of snowboarder-skateboarder-shredder-bro Shaun White out in the universe, America. Set your RSS filters accordingly: TMZ reports that "the ginger carpet matches the ginger drapes." Happy Monday! [TMZ, NY Post]...

Adam Morrison Is Coming Home From Serbia, Where He Was Playing Basketball, Apparently
For today's edition of Former College Hoops Sweathearts: Where Are They Now?, we're checking in with former Gonzaga star and former No. 3 overall pick Adam Morrison. Again....

Dan Lozano: Albert Pujols's Superagent, "King Of Sleaze Mountain"
Somebody's out to get Dan Lozano. The agent for Albert Pujols, Lozano is pursuing what everyone expects to be the biggest contract in baseball, the financial and professional zenith of a career that's been two decades of success. When Lozano, 44, left the Beverly Hills Sports Council last year, he t...