nut Page 20 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night
What you missed while noticing that the head of the World Health Organization's department of HIV/AIDS has an unfortunate name ... • Ruud van Nistelrooy sends Italians to brink of World Cup qualifying doom. • NFL: In non-Ruud van Nistelrooy news, the Bears cut Cedric Benson. • Agent Zero opts out of...

Noun. 1.) A Generalized Loss Of Feeling In The Testicles 2.) Roger Clemens
With Erin Andrews frolicking around backstage, who could blame eventual grand champion of the spelling world Sameer Mishra to let loose a little Freudian slip? How else is he supposed to sublimate that sexual energy? Rub your finger on your hand any harder and it's playing with yourself....

About Last Night
What you missed while realizing that making fun of names is just too easy sometimes ... • NBA: It's Pau Gasol who's been carrying the Lakers all season, so why is it Kobe's back that hurts? Jazz 123, Lakers 115, OT. • MLB: Big Hurt ties Cal Ripken in all-time RBI; Athletics rough up Rangers. • Colle...

And It's C-m Rocket In The Lead!
This weekend, those of you who are equine-obsessed or have an affinity for minty rum drinks and giant pink hats, will most likely have a rooting interest in the most exhilarating two minutes in sports, the Kentucky Derby. Right now, the favorite horse is a strapping young colt named "Big Brown", a n...

Support Competitive Eating As An Olympic Sport!
We know, we know: None of you care about competitive eating as much as we do. That still doesn't make this plea to make competitive eating an Olympic sport any less inspired....

Look Deep Into The Gullet Of Joey Chestnut
Actually, he shares the blog with fellow competitive eater Pat Bertoletti, and in the above video, he shows off his training regimen. Yes: He fires himself for eating asparagus by listening to Rob Zombie. Who wouldn't?...

Mark Littell, The Nutty Buddy, Is Completely Nuts
Two days ago, I emailed Mark Littell, former major leaguer and creator of the Nutty Buddy to see if he'd comment on that story I was working on about Flyers center Patrick Thoresen and the dangers of pucks (or anything) to the groin, etc. I told him (or, rather, the Nutty Buddy crack email team) tha...

Do Protective Cups Even Help Any More?
In Saturday's 5-4 loss to the Capitals, the Flyers' Patrick Thoresen attempted to block a shot with his body and ended up getting drilled with the puck. But, unlike the thousands of other times this occurs during a hockey season, Thoresen got hit with the puck right in the peach basket, which dente...

Finally, Massholes Have Something to Celebrate
As we wait for the Final Four to finally kick off on Saturday, the gang at Storming the Floor are amusing themselves with the championship-like substance contained in the NIT and CBI post-season tournaments....

Mayweather Practically Unbeatable When Armed With Metal Furniture
Remember the good old days, when boxers waited until they were old and washed up before turning up on the professional wrestling circuit? Of course then you don't make $20 million just for showing up, as Floyd Mayweather did on Sunday at WrestleMania XXIV in a completely legitimate not-at-all script...

Let The 'Texas Hold 'Em' Trial Begin!
Looking for something to watch when the NCAA Tournament is over? Hope your cable company offers Court TV, because the trial of the decade is about to begin; the case of the Oklahoma Sooners fan who ripped the scrotum of a Texas Longhorns fan in a bar fight. Nancy Grace is working herself into a lath...

Massachusetts Minutemen
1. So THAT'S what she meant! While vacationing in Boston one summer, I met a lovely girl. After spending a week with her, she told me she loved the Minutemen. Unfortunately for me, I was the wrong kind of "minuteman." The University of Massachusetts mascot comes from the Revolutionary War era where ...

About Last Night
What you missed while in jail ... • NBA: Take your time coming back, Yao. Rockets win 19th straight. • College basketball: Gonzaga losing to San Diego in the WCC final? Inconceivable! • NFL: Titans raid Colts, take OG Jake Scott. Peyton stocks up on aspirin....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to come up with its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......


Roger Clemens Begs You To Sue Him
So here's a fun twist: There's a possibility, after Roger Clemens' HARD HITTING interview with Mike Wallace this Sunday on "60 Minutes," that Brian McNamee could sue him....

The Culinary Genius Of Bill Belichick
For some reason, today seems like a really, really, r-e-a-l-l-y slow sports day. Maybe it's because the NFL lineup at 1:00 is substandard. Maybe it's because Dan Shanoff is making nary a sound as he quietly crunchees the numbers to see if a three-loss team can make the BCS championship game. So t...

SHOTY First Round: Kige Ramsey Vs. Joey Chestnut
Because Thursday is, you know, Thanksgiving, we're gonna have voting both today and tomorrow. It'll put you in the mood for tryptophan....

Manute Bol And Spud Webb Can Sell Chicken
We're not going to harp on this, and we're not going to try to steal their luster, so we're just gonna beg you to sprint over to Wizznutzz and check out what is truly "the greatest piece of sports memorabilia of all time....