on Page 6461 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Only Soccer Can Get You Off The Junk
It's tough to incentivize a person trying to kick a heroin habit. The only thing you can give them that would make them happy is, uh, more heroin, and that won't do. So England is trying something new: Giving away soccer tickets....
Who's Sorry Now? Melo Edition
There is possibly no one on earth who is sorrier than Carmelo Anthony right now; his DUI arrest on Monday has placed him in a state of regret that can actually be seen from space. Call it the Great Wall of Remorse. We just couldn't ignore it here at Who's Sorry Now. Here's his statement, found on th...
Toronto Versus Orlando: The "Now <em>Here's</em> A Series" Series
Over the next few days, Basket Bawful and Free Darko will be previewing each NBA Playoff series. Basket Bawful looks at the Eastern Conference today, continuing with the series between the Toronto Raptors and the Orlando Magic, which begins Sunday....
Cal Ripken Debunks A Great Urban Legend
Everybody has a favorite sports urban legend. Some like the Rafael Palmeiro Sleeps With Ryne Sandberg's Wife one. Others are fans of the Kevin Mitchell Cuts The Heads Of Cats one. Our preference has always been the Orioles Canceled A Game Because Cal Ripken Couldn't Play Because He Found Kevin Costn...
Roethlisberger Attempts To Renew Classic Steelers/Cowboys Rivalry
Perhaps he was coaxed into saying it by a sound bite-hungry Mike Tirico and Michelle Tafoya. Maybe he was just trying to make the December 7 game between the Cowboys and Steelers a little more melodramatic. Whatever the reason, Big Ben Roethlisberger, drinking champion and clumsy motorcyclist, has s...
Chad Johnson's Attitude Reaches New Level Of Stinko-ness
It was only a couple years ago when Bengals' wide receiver Chad Johnson was cause celebre to NFL fans; his defiance against the league for his wacky endzone celebrations seemed harmless and amusing, even if it did cost his team the occasional 15-yard penalty. He was also quotable, seemingly self-awa...
Philadelphia Versus Detroit: The Feel-Good Killer Series
Over the next few days, Basket Bawful and Free Darko will be previewing each NBA Playoff series. Basket Bawful looks at the Eastern Conference today, continuing with the series between the Detroit Pistons and the Philadelphia 76ers, which begins Sunday....
Trevor Immelman, Big Black Dildos, Ham Sandwiches, Whippings And The Abandonment Of Game Plans
This is BALLS DEEP With Big Daddy Drew (Balls® is a registered trademark and has been used with the expressed written consent of AJ Daulerio). It's gonna be like an SI Point After column, only with dick jokes. You can email him here....
Listening To Old Games, Now, In Real Time
• A grand experiment involving time travel, radio broadcasts and the Brooklyn Dodgers. [This Blog Sits at the Intersection of Anthropology and Economics] • Garbage Pail Kids, and the future of sport. [Food Court Lunch] • Fun NFL Draft games. [Bleacher Report] • Japan and China will settle this over ...
Clay Bennett Is Happy To Screw Oklahoma Too
For some reason, we imagined Oklahoma City welcoming Clay Bennett and the Sonics with arms extended, lying prostrate, screaming "thank you" to the heavens. Anytime someone does something to a city as horrible as what Bennett has done to Seattle, there has to be someone who benefits, right? Other tha...
Media Approval Ratings: Kenny Smith
The playoffs are just two days away now, which means we're going to be seeing a lot of Kenny Smith and his "hilarious" Gone Fishin' bits after a team is eliminated from the playoffs. The man deals with Charles Barkley every night, and that's no small feat....
Atlanta Versus Boston: The Execution Series
Over the next few days, Basket Bawful and Free Darko will be previewing each NBA Playoff series. Basket Bawful looks at the Eastern Conference today, starting with the series between the Boston Celtics and the Atlanta Hawks, which begins Sunday....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
KSK Blogger Disgraces Washington Post's Pristine Image
The young man in this picture, enjoying himself with the Pittsburgh Parrot, is Michael Tunison. He has two lives. In one, he is Michael Tunison, reporter for The Washington Post. In the other, he is Christmas Ape, one of the crew at Kissing Suzy Kolber and a weekend editor at this here site. Earlier...
The Obligatory Cardinals Post You've All Been Dreading
We know we're being idiots even discussing this, but we might not have the opportunity to point it out much longer: Our Cardinals are in first place and playing their asses off....
Webb Rising, Zito Waning In The West
That sonic boom you heard in San Francisco on Wednesday was caused by pitchers Brandon Webb and Barry Zito. The former Cy Young winners are moving so quickly in opposite directions that the rapid heating and expansion of air has created enough pressure to cause explosive sound waves in China Basin....
Murray Season, Fire!
The NHL Closer is written by the five horny gentlemen from Melt Your Face Off. We accept tips in the form of Krispy Kremes, Pappy Van Winkle whiskey and whatever powder comes off Lindsay Lohan's C-notes....
The NBA Playoff Puzzle Is Finally Complete
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's "resting his starters" today. So you can find him stretching and doing some light jogging at Basketbawful. Enjoy! They ain't dead yet! Apparently, rumors of San Antonio's demise were greatly exaggerated, because the Spurs pulled an "Ivan Drago versus ...
Goodbye, Isiah. We Shall Never Meet Another Like You
The NBA Playoffs schedule is all set, and we'll certainly be overflowing with coverage and discussion and all you might expect from your sports blog, but we really need to start today off with a eulogy. At some point today, if it hasn't happened already (and the ESPNews crawl seems to think so), Is...