own Page 389 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you've finished drug testing the high school band ... • MLB: San Francisco at Los Angeles Dodgers. Barry not expected to play today. Just to mess with his head, this should be the one game that Hank Aaron attends. [ESPN2] • WNBA: Detroit at San Antonio; Sacramento at Seattle. Yep...
You Still Got That Little BB In Your Eye, Kornacki?
You'd think having to cover the Kansas City Royals was a pain in the ass as it is when ... BAM! A pellet-gun bullet straight to the face! Jesus, Emil! Watch where you point that thing!...
Selig Won't Watch, But We'll Have To
Well, if that whole Barry Bonds Won't Play On ESPN thing turns out to be based in reality, we're all in luck; Bonds is never going to break Hank Aaron's record. Because everyone of his at-bats is gonna be on The Worldwide Leader until, well, until he breaks it, or dies. So, you know, enjoy....
Sergio Garcia Retains Lead At Carnoustie; Enjoys a Michelob
The last time The Open Championship strolled through Carnoustie Sergio Garcia looked like a an overwhelmed high school player who struggled to break 90 both days. Eight years later he's back in Scotland and he's just one round away from becoming this year's wire-to-wire champion. There's no question...
Michael Vick Got Served, Protested Against
Everybody seems to be pretty peeved with Mr. Vick...even PETA! Those plucky characters spent yesterday afternoon picketing outside NFL headquarters. Of course Roger Goodell wasn't actually there to see it, he was safe from their mutton chopped intimidators in his subterranean bunker....
German TV Is Shocked To Find Doping In This Establishment
We know we're gonna blow your minds here, but it turns out that there has been a bit of a blood doping scandal at the Tour de France! We know! In cycling! Of all places! You know, you think you can trust a sport. Anyway, a German television station has decided it's had just about enough, thank you v...
Joe Torre, Suddenly Racist
So, everybody, is Joe Torre a racist? You certainly might have thought so watching the Sunday night game last evening....
Brady Quinn's Unskinny Bop
Thanks, Mondesi's House, for reminding us once again that there is absolutely nothing like a Brady Quinn photo. That's Bret Michaels. Of course it is....
MLB Gets Its Rockwell On
Sure, Major League Baseball might have had a little trouble figuring out that whole steroid issue thing, but it's nice to be made aware that they've got their finger on the pulse of one of the game's most serious problems: Time wasting....
Please Do Not Protest Bonds In Sign Form
Now that San Francisco Chronicle reporters Mark Fainaru-Wada and Lance Williams aren't going to jail for their stories about Barry Bonds, they're getting awfully cocky: They're now exposing the Orwellian practice of shutting down anti-Bonds signs at baseball stadiums....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you brush your woolly mammoth ... • Boxing: Super middleweights, Yusef (Easy) Mack vs. Jose Juan (Gone) Vasquez, at New York. [ESPN2] • MLB: St. Louis at New York Mets. This time, it's personal (not really). [ESPN] • MLB: Nationals at Braves. Bring me the head of Screech the Eagle. ...
Police Make It Rain On Pac Man
So much for Pac Man Jones just being an innocent bystander in that strip club shooting ... he's been formally charged with two counts of felony coercion....
You Know, You Think You Know A Guy
One would think that, after all that's gone down with him over the past year or so, Pac Man Jones would steer clear of the following things:...
Let's Laugh At The Dancing Red Sox Fans
Just to pile on ... some douchey Red Sox fans....
How Mark McGwire Will Get You On Jury Duty
Part of our job is to bring you the best links we can from around the Web, highlighting all the talented people doing amazing things simply because they love it. But the site we think might be the best, and the one we read more religiously than any other, is Viva El Birdos. We don't link it that oft...
Come See Rick Reilly Make Armpit Noises
We've encouraged you to come to the Varsity Letters Reading Series in New York before, but if you come to tonight's endeavor, you'll be in for a special treat. (Depending on how you define "special.") The headlining reader is Sports Illustrated columnist/stand-up comic Rick Reilly. (Donald Evans and...
Somewhere Out There, There's An Elephant With Your Name On It
A few commenters mentioned this yesterday, and we think it's a fair question: When is it OK to laugh? The guy we wrote about who plummeted 75 feet off a cliff in his golf cart was, after all, a real person, with a family and pets and an active Netflix account. But the first thing we thought of when ...