owns Page 215 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Who Wants To See A Photo Of Amar'e Stoudemire Jumping Naked Into A Pool?
It was you guys, right? That ESPN The Mag Body Issue, is really, uh, shaping up to be, uh, something. [via the seemingly appropriately named All Ball]...

Duke "Fuck List" Author Gets Potential Book, Movie Deals
Oh the shame! Karen F. Owen (left, unsmudged), for all the hardship she's caused so many at this point, has piqued interest from some big guns in the movie-making and publishing worlds. A star is porn. Or born....

The Doug Gottlieb-Jim Mora Mini-Fight: "Is This Your First Interview? Jesus Christ."
Jim Mora Jr. was on ESPN Radio yesterday and he talked with Doug Gottlieb about Michael Vick and Donovan McNabb. Mora found Gottlieb's line of questioning as asinine as we find Doug Gottlieb. It was all very delightful....

Mariotti Pleads No Contest
Jay Mariotti pleaded no contest to a single count of misdemeanor domestic violence; the six remaining charges were dropped. Says his attorney: "Today's resolution ... ends the matter once and for all." Right. No one will ever mention this again. [LAT]...

Gregg Easterbrook Is As Smart About Head Injuries In Football As He Is About Jews In Hollywood
Look, I know we all pretend not to notice Gregg Easterbrook still making an ass of himself over on ESPN.com, but when the guy carries on as if he loves football head injuries almost as much as he hates the Jews, well......

The Worst Column Ever By Someone Not Named Bill Plaschke
A Syracuse columnist made a factual error. His next column consists solely of a correction repeated 50 times, à la classroom chalkboard. Meh, still better than Bleacher Report....

Delonte West Finally Sets The Record Straight About Banging LeBron James's Mom
Yesterday, at the Boston Celtics media day, 98.5's Rich Shertenlieb decided to brazenly ask The Question to the Celtics' newly re-acquired troublesome guard....

Meet Your New Undersized, Scraptastic, Very White New England Sports Cult Hero: Danny Woodhead
Danny Woodhead, the Jets castoff and Rex Ryan-anointed "little fucker," made his Patriots debut yesterday and is already being touted as the economy-sized Wes Welker. Chief among these proponents is Dan Shaughnessy. Of course. Let's look at the best of the worst....

Jeff Garcia and Maurice Clarett Make America A Sadder Place
Until its inevitable death next month, the United Football League will serve as an outlet for almost-rans to continue playing despite not getting tapped into the NFL steel-cage match. That's a good thing. I guess....

Ines Sainz Rips Women's Media Group A New One
Sainz basically told the Association for Women in Sports Media to go fuck off, she doesn't want their help. She also had harsh words for the journos and columnists covering the story. Please don't hate us, Ines....

God Gave Mark Dantonio A Heart Attack For Beating Notre Dame, Says Soon-To-Be-Suspended Radio Guy
We said it's time to let the MSU/ND game go. Matt Patrick, of a South Bend talk radio station, should probably have read us before he insinuated that God struck Dantonio down for cheating against the Catholics....

Won't Someone Think Of The Gay-Panicky Columnist's Children?
For a master class in how to write a breathtakingly stupid sports column from the Cokie Roberts school of "How will we tell the children about blowjobs?" argumentum ad moppet, please read FanHouse's David Whitley, hemming and hawing about gays on the Kiss Cam....

One Cross-Country Gal's Surname Must Be A Nightmare For Headline Writers
There's a high school cross country runner named Madz Negro who keeps making news due to her running prowess. This results in headlines from the Springfield, Ill. State Journal-Register like this. Or like this....

Newsreader Revealed As Pantsless Behind Desk
Confirming what we all suspected, one anchor was caught by cameras showing what really goes on underneath the desk....

Today, In Unintentional Rape Puns
Obviously this headline is a pun on the Orem Owlz's playoff opponents, the Raptors. Not anything else. Don't know why anyone would think that. [MiLB.com, H/T Jared]...

Brian Baldinger Also Thinks Ines Sainz "Brought It Upon Herself"
And he shares many other thoughts including this one: "I wish I was on the Jets practice field and they throwing me pass patterns by her as well. You would have seen me stumbling to get to her." Go Dinger! [97.5Fanatic]...

<em>Sports Illustrated</em> Editors Apparently Make Clinton Portis Look Like Betty Friedan
The great Sally Jenkins on Ines Sainz, Clinton Portis, and women in the locker room: "To be honest, the worst sexists I ever met were a couple of editors in suits at Sports Illustrated, not half-clothed players."...

Letter From A Young Female Sportswriter: Ines Sainz, You Make Me Want To Stop Trying
If rationality and feminism and mediocre Spanish skills didn't stop me, I would write to Ines Sainz and ask her to tell me why she does what she does for a living....

Pro Football Doubletalk
We missed the initial to-do over the scene depicted here, wherein Albert Haynesworth mills around enormously in the vicinity of a defensive meeting, but it's since become something of a Rorschach that determines if you're a sensible human being or Mike Florio....

Tennis Has Its <em>Heidi</em> Moment, And Everyone Is Pissed
"This partnership will provide more tennis, to more people, in more ways than ever before," said the USTA's CEO in 2008 after signing a six-year ESPN deal. He was partially correct: I've never seen a tennis broadcast quite like yesterday's....