pe Page 978 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fox L.A. Legal Analyst On Jerry Sandusky: "He Shot His Wad"
Understanding the Jerry Sandusky trial from a West Coast viewpoint is hard. After all, California is so far away from Pennsylvania! So when KTTV, the Fox affiliate in Los Angeles, brought on legal analyst Robin Sax—a former district attorney apparently notable enough to have a Wikipedia article—th...
Jerry Sandusky's Attorney Compares Trial To Soap Opera. You'll Never Guess Which One.
After a day in which Jerry Sandusky's defense team began stating its case by trotting out character witnesses who did nothing to dispute what's being alleged, the looming question in Bellefonte, Pa., is whether Sandusky himself will take the stand. At this point, it might be Sandusky's only way out,...
A Mural Featuring Mike McQueary Tastefully Adorns Happy Valley Titty Bar
Reader Jayme recently returned from a trip to the End Zone Club, a titty joint located in scenic Port Matilda, Pa., just 13 miles away from the Penn State campus. He files this report:...
Did Jerry Sandusky Admit His Guilt To Bob Costas In Portion Of Interview NBC Never Aired?
Remember that Rock Center interview Jerry Sandusky did with Bob Costas back in November? Remember how Sandusky creepily said things to Costas like "I enjoy young people"? Remember how it took Sandusky more than 16 seconds to answer a direct question about whether he's "sexually attracted to young ...
Tiger Woods Is Still A Head Case
Through the first two rounds of the U.S. Open at Olympic, Tiger Woods looked a lot like the Tiger Woods we saw at Torrey Pines in 2008, when he beat Rocco Mediate in a full-round Monday playoff despite a double stress-fracture in his left tibia.* That was also Tiger's last major championship. By nig...
Roger Clemens Found Not Guilty
The Roger Clemens perjury trial—a trial that was alternately confusing, nostalgic, and soporific, but at all times a giant waste of taxpayer money and government manpower—puttered to a sad and inevitable end today with Clemens being found not guilty on all counts....
Editor's Note: Suggesting Dan Snyder Is A Bullshitter Is Not As Libelous As Writing, "Dan Snyder Blows Dogs"
The previous post on Deadspin might have given the impression that Redskins owner Dan Snyder is a liar. Snyder takes such accusations very seriously, and so do we, which is why we now endeavor to answer the question: Is it libelous to suggest that Dan Snyder is a lying-ass shitbag vulgarian?...
Dan Snyder's Official Team Bio Is A Tour De Force Of Bullshit
When you think of Redskins owner Dan Snyder, you think of a miserable, gutless sack of shit who ruined a franchise and made an entire fanbase hate his guts. Ah, but that's just how Dan Snyder is perceived in the real world. The world of official team bios, on the other hand, is magical place where a...
Somehow, Jerry Sandusky's Defense Strategy Is Even Worse Than Imagined
Since Jerry Sandusky's arrest last November, Lawyerin' Joe Amendola has made it ridiculously easy to make fun of his unique brand of lawyerin'. At the same time, given that Lawyerin' Joe decided to drag this case to trial despite all the evidence against his client, it was still reasonable to assume...
The U.S. Open Trophy Ceremony Videobomber Is A Deforestation Activist Named "Jungle Bird"
The roosterlike fellow who invaded last night's U.S. Open trophy ceremony and earned a scolding from champion Webb Simpson has been identified as a kooky deforestation activist named "Jungle Bird."...
Charlie Pierce Destroys An Awful Column Proclaiming Bryce Harper As A Conservative Hero
Last Friday, the Daily Caller published what is truly one of the most insane pieces of sportswriting to ever exist, in which a dumb guy attempts to turn Bryce Harper into a symbol of conservative values and the reincarnation of Ronald Reagan, or some shit....
Ohio Man Wants Buckeye Removed As State Tree Because It's A "Bisexual" Plant
Earlier this month, in the letters to the editor section of the Findlay (Ohio) Courier, this gem ran:...
A Reminder That Everything About The Olympics Is Always Corrupt
Forget the NCAA—the biggest amateur athletics scam going is the Olympic Games. The best sportsmen, sportswomen, and sportschildren in the world, all conveniently paid in "glory" and "pride" instead of money. And the Games make money, plenty of it. But a host city has never once shown a profit. So in...
Golf Has A New "Cigar Guy"
Remember Cigar Guy? There's a new member of the stogie-sporting clan, and this one's garbed in what appears to be a tribute to the late Payne Stewart. We only saw this one glimpse of him, and frankly his expression leaves a bit to be desired; even worse, he was at best the second-weirdest person at...
Jerry Sandusky Still Has A Legal Advantage Over His Accusers Because Pennsylvania Law Is Still Stupid
Prosecutors have identified all but two of the 10 men Jerry Sandusky is accused of sexually assaulting as children. All eight of those known victims finished testifying Thursday, so those of us following the trial are hereby spared from any more nauseating details of the former Penn State defensive ...
Webb Simpson Wins U.S. Open, Has Trophy Ceremony Invaded By Squawking British Man
Webb Simpson seized his first major title on a U.S. Open Sunday rife with errors in play by all competitors. At times, it looked more like the Albert Achievement Awards than a professional golf tournament, but by far the weirdest moment came after play ended when a man garbed in Union Jack colors...
Your NBA Finals Game 3 Open Thread
The adjective of the night is static. Russell Westbrook ain't changing. The Thunder ain't changing. Will these refusals to change, result in changes themselves? Or will the Heat remain true to form and blow the doors off the place early only to slowly bleed to death? That's why we watch and talk, d...
Beau Hossler Is Young, Has A Missing Caddy
On the third hole of the final day at the U.S. Open, our teenaged Beau hit a shot into the sand. He would get on the green on his next shot, though likely gritting his be-braced teeth—what with all the sand and aggravation. His caddy then went to clean up after him in the bunker. But, it appears h...
Your Sunday Afternoon Open Thread Smorgasbord
We've got Baseball starting now across this great land. Then at 2:45 p.m. we've got Denmark-Germany and Portugal-Netherlands in Euro 2012 action. The U.S. Open also concludes this afternoon/evening and Game 3 of the NBA Finals is on ABC at 8:00 p.m. (I'll probably throw up a separate thread for tha...