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Nutty Blackmail Plot Involves "Well-Known" Premier League Player Jumping Out Hotel Window Mid-Booty Call
When one Premier League player, whose name is being protected by the authorities, walked into Natalie Wood’s hotel room last year and began to undress, he must’ve believed he was only in for another night of fun and sex with the woman for whom he’d been cheating on his partner. Instead, before the p...

PR Genius Tony Wyllie Takes His Talents Away From Dan Snyder
Sports radio station WJFK in D.C. reported today that Tony Wyllie has quit as Dan Snyder’s communications director to take a job with the Special Olympics. If any good PR came Snyder’s way during Wyllie’s nine-year run with Washington’s NFL team, it doesn’t come to mind. As for the gaffes on Wyllie’...

The Good NFL Quarterbacks Are Falling Apart
Even leaving aside the headaches and nausea that are specific to the fans of the Jets and Giants, and the flu-like symptoms that universally apply to all AFC South games, watching the NFL does something to a person. You may sit down in front of a game as a normal human—again, not applicable to Jets ...

Manchester City Unable To Overcome The Irrepressible Might Of Norwich City
In what could end up being the most stunning upset of season, recently-promoted Norwich City took down defending Premier League champions on Saturday, 3-2. The result came on the back of a stellar performance from Norwich’s Finnish veteran Teemu Pukki and a putrid display from City’s two center halv...

Alabama Wants Students To Exchange Their Privacy For College Football Playoff Tickets
The fervor that students who attend SEC schools have for their respective football programs is so well known that it’s become cliché for religious comparisons to be made. But for University of Alabama coach Nick Saban, that level of fandom has just not been cutting it lately, and he’s gone so far as...

Should A Home Run Automatically End An Inning?
I will not keep you waiting for an answer on this one. No, absolutely not and under no circumstances would it be a good idea for a homer to automatically end an inning in a big league baseball game. It seems important not to equivocate on this question. And yet this Funbag question, from a listener ...

The Cowboys Look Fun As Hell
Right, right, right: It came against a crummy opponent whose ineptitude no doubt made things far easier than they had to be, and it was only Week 1. But in terms of personnel, play design, and execution, the Cowboys on Sunday showed they’re capable of being as forward-thinking and efficient as any o...

Donald Trump: We Love Bill Belichick, Don't We, And Also Curing AIDS?
There are two versions of President Donald Trump that appear in public. They both inhabit the same body—the same Youppi-shaped torso pitched forward at the same implausible angles, same ghost-pale eyelids fluttering alarmingly, same resplendent candyfloss Kangol of hair stuck on top of it like a wei...

We Can Now Add Jadon Sancho To The List Of Great Players Arsène Wenger "Almost" Signed
The only thing former Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger likes to talk about more than the philosophical implications of life as a soccer manager is all the players he claims he narrowly missed out on signing. The latest addition to this nearly infinite list of Almost Gunners is former Manchester City ac...

Hong Kong Soccer Fans Turn Their Backs And Boo Chinese National Anthem
Fans at Hong Kong Stadium turned their backs on the Chinese national anthem prior to a World Cup qualifying match against Iran on Tuesday, bringing the long-running pro-democracy protests to the sporting world, per the Associated Press. The fans not only turned their backs, but also held up signs wi...

Maybe You Just Like Watching Baseball Games
FiveThirtyEight, Nate Silver’s math blog, published an article by Travis Sawchik yesterday under the headline “Do We Even Need Minor League Baseball?” In the piece, Sawchik argues that advancements in technology and data analysis have made both the discernment of genuine major-league baseball talent...

Tennessee Follows Up Dismal Loss To Georgia State With Excruciating Loss To BYU
That players-only meeting didn’t work, and it seems the problem wasn’t the receiver who enjoyed a meme at his own team’s expense. The Tennessee Volunteers dropped their home opener to Georgia State—yes, State—but had the opportunity to rebound Saturday in Knoxville, this time against BYU. They were...

Donald Trump Is Not Going To Let This Hurricane Thing Go
It can be difficult to remember given that he routinely appears on television with toilet paper on the soles of both his shoes and at least one of his hands stuck in a big jug of peanut butter, but Donald Trump’s opening position in all things is that he has never been wrong. He has been wronged, an...

Chris Jericho's Stolen Title Belt Saga Is The Perfect Capper To A Wild Week In Pro Wrestling
Leave it to Chris Jericho to make himself the biggest story in professional wrestling by virtue of partying too hard. The 48-year-old legend won the inaugural All Elite Wrestling world heavyweight championship at the company’s All Out pay-per-view on Saturday, defeating Hangman Adam Page in a solid-...

George Springer Carted Off After Smashing Head Into Outfield Wall During Acrobatic Catch
Every time an outfielder tracks a ball to the outfield wall, there’s a small but not insignificant chance of something violent happening. Perhaps not quite on the scale of the outfielder in the baseball blooper reel from The Naked Gun, but danger is inherent anytime someone sprints toward a wall, es...

NJPW Let KENTA Finish A Match Despite Being Obviously Concussed
Months ago, fans had Saturday circled as one of the wildest pro wrestling days of the year: All Elite Wrestling’s All Out pay-per-view event would get the bulk of the American attention, but that day also featured dueling events from New Japan Pro Wrestling and WWE in the UK. There was so much going...

The Game No One Cares About Is The Biggest Game Of Their Lives
“Don’t count your reps, make your reps count.”...

Russian Sportscaster, Sprinkler Battle To Draw In Exhilarating Showdown
Evgeniy Evnevich, a correspondent for Russia’s Match TV, had just begun his dispatch on the status of CSKA Moscow midfielder Kristijan Bistrović when a devilish sprinkler began to pursue him....

Liverpool And Manchester City Still Reign Supreme
The start of a new season offers all the promise of a blank slate. Onto this yet untouched slab, our imaginations can run wild carving any conceivable array of results and events, thrillingly unconstrained by anything other than our own whims and predictions. However, though we are just three matche...

Nice Forehand, Dude
Maybe a little close to the body, but his head stayed down, and the weight is transferring nicely. Looks like Dominic Thiem’s old racket....