pti Page 14 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tim Duncan's Optical Illusion Photobomb Is The Best Photobomb
No, Tim Duncan does not want to sex the Spurs fan on the left. It just looks that way, because this is the most mind-bending photobomb we've ever seen. It belongs in the Internet Hall of Fame....
Westboro Baptist Got A Warm Welcome When It Protested The OKC Game
The Westboro Baptist Church's protest of last night's Rockets-Thunder game—in response to Jason Collins's coming-out, naturally—was sad and trivial, as the WBC's protests always are. Six picketers showed up. Many more were there to greet them....
Westboro Baptist Will Picket The Final Four
Westboro Baptist, that group of awful people with colorful signs who are really concerned about who you're having sex with, have announced on the "Picket Schedule" section of their website that they'll be heading to Atlanta for next weekend's Final Four. ...
Ohio University Made A Bowl Game, Won Big, And Lost $78,569
How little sense does the BCS make? Well, apart from the difficult-to-calculate, in some cases negligible gains a university makes from the exposure of a bowl game—anyone applying (or donating) to Fresno State because they got crushed by SMU in the Hawaii Bowl?—the total cost of travel and accommoda...
Don Rumsfeld Fights The Fascists; Or, Why Are The Olympics So Corrupt?
Originally published in Bloomberg View...
Tim Tebow Cancels Speaking Engagement At Dallas Hate Church
The First Baptist Church of Dallas was all set to welcome Tim Tebow for a little talk on April 28, but then the thoughts of the megachurch's pastor, Robert Jeffress, made their way to the heathen media, which was all too eager to spread the word....
Basketball Players Spent Their Wild And Crazy All-Star Saturday Meeting For Three And A Half Hours And Voting To Dismiss Their Union Director
Wojnarowski reports that Billy Hunter's dismissal, widely presumed to be an inevitability after the myriad scandals that recently punctured his cocoon of power, was voted on and affirmed by a group of NBA players this afternoon. A bit more on the meeting that sealed his fate once and for all:...
Here's The U.S. Men's National Team Friendly In Tampa That <em>Outside the Lines</em> Thinks Was Fixed By A Singaporean Crime Syndicate
On Monday, we noted that the director of Europol, which conducted an investigation into the massive match-fixing scandal that has called into question a great deal of soccer's recent history, was a little surprised that the plot infiltrated the United Kingdom. Europol's Rob Wainwright told reporte...
Cole Hamels Has Finally Acquired The Multiracial Children Necessary To Recreate His Luxury Condo Ad
Three years ago, we highlighted this bizarre magazine supplement featuring Phillies pitcher Cole Hamels and his wife Heidi shilling for some Center City real estate. One showed fashion plate Hamels listening to ocean sounds from his very pregnant wife. The other showed the Hamelses and their childre...
Port Said Soccer Violence Leads To 21 Death Sentences, Which Kick Off City-Wide Riots
Today, nearly a year after 79 died when supporters of rival soccer teams Al-Masry and Al-Ahly fought in the Al-Ahly stadium after a Feb. 1 game in the Egyptian city of Port Said, a court sentenced 21 people to death in connection with the riot. Trouble began to brew in Port Said shortly after the ve...
NBA Players Association Head Billy Hunter Once Used $22,000 Of Union Funds To Buy Derek Fisher A Watch
The NBAPA's board recently commissioned a independent review of the record of noted nepotism-abuser Billy Hunter, who has been union head for 16 years. Though the review found that his actions fell short of illegality, it did reveal a few odd pieces of information about the judgment of Hunter, the m...
Phil Jackson Has Put A Ginormous Diamond Engagement Ring On Jeanie Buss' Hand
Holy freakin' diamonds, Batman. Phil Jackson, who obviously knows a thing or 11 about acquiring rings, should never, ever be questioned in this department. Still, when it comes to the Lakers and larger-than-your-head rings, it's awful tough to beat the champ....
"Take That Nigger Off The TV, We Wanna Watch Football!": Idiots Respond To NBC Pre-Empting <em>Sunday Night Football</em>
NBC pre-empted the first quarter of tonight’s 49ers-Patriots game to show President Obama’s speech at the Newtown memorial for victims of the Sandy Hook shooting. As you might expect, many football fans didn’t take kindly to this. (So, too, some Bob’s Burgers fans.) Here are those idiots, led by so...
A Week After Court Filings Revealed Candace Williams's Claim That Terrell Suggs Punched Her And Dragged Her Alongside A Car, They Got Married
One week to the day. On Dec. 7, The Baltimore Sun obtained court documents filed by Candace Williams alleging that Terrell Suggs had "punched her in the neck and drove a car containing their two children at a 'high rate of speed' while she was being dragged alongside"; on Dec. 14—yesterday, three da...
Georgetown And Tennessee Missed The Record For Lowest Scoring Game Of The Shot Clock Era By Just Four Points
Ah! So close. Back in 2008, Rick Majerus's St. Louis Billikens scored 20 points (and held George Washington to 49 points, so that was a plus) in their first conference game of the season, meaning the teams combined for 69 during the contest. Last night, Georgetown and Tennessee came perilously near ...
D-III Player's 138 Point-Game Is A Sham Record And Shouldn't Be Celebrated By Anyone
Jack Taylor, of the Grinnell College Pioneers, scored 138 points in a game last night, against Faith Baptist Bible College. It's a mindblowing number, shattering the old NCAA mark of 113, and it's being trumpeted as one of sports' all-time individual achievements. It is not. It is bullshit. It is ju...
Mitch Albom Was "Phony Sweet" And Other Highlights Of <em>PTI</em>'s Accidentally Released Behind-The-Scenes Audio
ESPN helpfully publishes an audio podcast of its popular Pardon The Interruption program daily for viewers who can't find their way to a television at 5:30 p.m. Eastern. Yesterday, though, we received numerous emails alerting us to the bizarre nature of yesterday's podcast. For one, it was more tha...
Boxers Are Allowed To Choose Whether To Fight Opponents Who Have Failed Multiple Drug Tests, And One Chose Correctly Last Night
During the run-up to his fight against Danny Garcia at the Barclays Center Saturday night, Erik Morales failed two consecutive drug tests, testing positive for clenbuterol, the PED that got Alberto Contador stripped of the 2010 Tour de France title. He then passed a drug test on Friday night, meanin...
The Knicks' Tip-Off Event Was A Parade Of Sadness
The Knicks don't look like they'll be a legitimate contender for the Larry O'Brien Trophy this season. They're old as dirt and just generally depressing. Right now, the most entertaining aspect of the team is anything Rasheed Wallace does. Don't look at the roster. Aw, you looked at it, didn't you?...