reds Page 103 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Ball From Josh Beckett Touches This Child Like Nothing Else Can
Baseballs are the most important thing on earth. It's time we stopped pretending they aren't....
A Poem For Albert Haynesworth, Composed Solely Of Media Descriptions
Awful Albert, Abysmal Albert: Attitude-afflicted wash-up. Massive and huge and fat and lazy and difficult....
Brian Orakpo Is A Company Man, Although He Probably Shouldn't Be
Brian Orakpo can't quite find the words he's looking for. But the words he did give us help explain why the players didn't get more in the just-ended labor standoff....
Trent Williams Will Soon Be Wearing A $150,000 Silverback Gorilla Chain In The Club
One of Dan Steinberg's readers directed him to a video (see below) in which a jeweler shows off one of the more absurdly blingy items a professional athlete has ever commissioned. It's a black-and-white diamond encrusted silverback gorilla chain for Redskins tackle Trent "Silverback" Williams. Supp...
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part V: Return To River Bend
We already posted your daily link to Dave McKenna's "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," but here it is again for good measure. We'll post this mother until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit is nailed to a cross while dogs gnaw off its toes. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All...
Here's The Harry Potter-Referencing Legal Brief The ACLU Filed In The Dumbass Dan Snyder Libel Suit
The ACLU filed a brief yesterday in D.C. Superior Court slamming Dan Snyder for his dumbass libel lawsuit against the Washington City Paper and asking the court to toss out the case. D.C. councilmember Mary Cheh joined the brief, along with a raft of influential news organizations such as The Americ...
If You Didn't Watch The 15th Annual Summer Redneck Games On Saturday, You Missed Out
The 15th annual Summer Redneck Games happened on Saturday, in East Dublin, Georgia, and we weren't there. This we regret. Thankfully the Macon Telegraph did attend....
The First Casualty Of Dan Snyder's Dumbass Libel Suit Might Be Dan Snyder's Dumbass Lawyer
Failed journalist and wretched lawyer Dave Donovan announced today that he's leaving his job as Chief Operating Officer of the Redskins to return to the law firm whence he came (and where, ostensibly, lawyers can actually convince clients not to file dumbass lawsuits). Donovan attributes his decisio...
Bad Beats: Adrian Gonzalez Will Win Tonight's Home Run Derby
Hello, folks. Welcome back to Bad Beats, the column you visit for betting advice and sad tales of gambling woe. Read past Bad Beats here. Got any stories for us? Email us at [email protected]. Subject: Bad Beats....
Here's A Picture Of A Boob Getting Grabbed At Fenway
This photo comes from tipster Matthew M. who notes, "Jerry Remy and his broadcast partner lost their shit after the couples they were talking about got a little randy....
Here's A Reds Fan Sucking On Some Rando's Toes, Just Because
What's going on here? Do you know what's going on here? I don't know what's going on here, and neither does the person who took the picture. It's just some visiting Reds fan, going to town on some guy's toes. [Cards Diaspora]...
Red Sox Fan Catches Foul Ball With $7 Light Beer, Still Finishes Beer
If you paid that much for a Bud Light, you'd drink it, too....
Chicken-Hatted Lady Confounds Orsillo And Rem Dawg
In the middle of a ten-run inning, Red Sox broadcasters Don Orsillo and Jerry Remy got distracted by a fan wearing a chicken hat, and completely lost the plot....
Science! Shows That Red Sox Fans Are The Most Obsessed
According to metrics like attendance, revenue and money spent, Boston fans take the title as the most devoted in baseball. Maybe that's true, but Shaughnessy needs to be pelted with feces anyway. [Bundle]...
Redskins Force Kenny Chesney Upon Season Ticket Holders
A few months ago, the Redskins marketing department began the annual, Sisyphean task of convincing people to pay money to watch their team play football eight times. Realizing that this would be a tough sell, especially to those it had tricked before, it threw in a perk: people who renewed their pla...
Dan Snyder Subpoenas Washington Post Blogger For Linking To Washington City Paper Story
Oops, we almost forgot to post our daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be linking to until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit takes a Ceti Eel in the ear....
We Are All Dave McKenna CXI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit runs out of ways to die in this space....
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part IV: Cooke And Bligle Jim Escape To The Potomac
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CX.")...
We Are All Dave McKenna CIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit finds its way into the wood chipper....
We Are All Dave McKenna CVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit self-immolates in shame....