rex Page 14 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Top 10 Items Worth Stealing From Publix
When news broke this morning that Heisman winner Jameis Winston may have been busted for lifting some crab legs from a Tallahassee-area Publix supermarket, we felt a bit sad. There are way better things to shoplift from the store Where Shopping Is A Pleasure™, after all. Here are ten of those things...
Ten Sports We Want To See In A Mall
Tonight the Drake Relays will stage the fifth annual Mall Vault, which features the nation's best pole vaulters pole vaulting in a mall. Here are ten other sporting events that we want to see contested in a mall:...
Spring Beers, Ranked
Good news: No matter how you do your seasonal accounting, it's definitely spring now. You're already kinda bored with baseball, you've got mud in previously undiscovered orifices, and your favorite fair-weather hot dog stand will come and go before Dick Vitale screams at you again. Furthermore, I so...
Columnist Booted From Basketball Game; Commish Doesn't Like Coverage
Morris Dalla Costa, a columnist for the London Free Press, was ejected from the final game of a National Basketball League playoff series between the London Lightning and Windsor Express tonight because of what he reported about one team. The Canadian basketball league apparently contains some harsh...
Skyline Figures You'd Like Blue Noodles Under Your Diarrhea Sludge
Would you get a load of that horror. I mean lean on in here and get a nice big load of it. That is a pair of tubs of pasta, dyed red and blue by Louisville's Skyline Chili locations as a... what? celebration? like hell! ...of the upcoming Louisville-Kentucky Sweet 16 matchup. Because Skyline Chil...
Irish Beers, Ranked
St. Patrick's Day is tough on a civic-minded, humanist boozebag. I love New Year's Eve and Thanksgiving Morning and Arbor Weekend and all the other "amateur hours" that too many self-proclaimed sophisticates haughtily dismiss, but Paddy's Day comes soaked with complications beyond the rivers of glit...
Rex Chapman Is Having Problems With An Obsessive Fan
The perils of being a professional athlete are numerous. For former NBA player Rex Chapman, currently being flooded by hundreds of text messages from one lifelong admirer, it's his own damned fault for being so nice....
24 Light Beers, Ranked
Raise your hand if you're even fatter now than you were on New Year's Day. No, your other hand, the one that isn't strangling a donut. Oh, I see. Well, do you have a third hand? Never mind, the tear tracks carved through your powdered-sugar beard are affirmation enough....
Cereals, Ranked
Here is a list of breakfast cereals, in order of deliciousness....
The Young Ryan Brothers Dapping Each Other Causes A Swagger Overload
The hair. The mustaches. The swag. The young Ryan boys were so much cooler than you will ever be. ...
Rex And Rob Ryan Hit Up Hooters, Because Of Course They Do
Rex and Rob Ryan are in Indianapolis for the NFL scouting combine, and the brothers found some time to swing by the local Hooters for a photo op, once again confirming every assumption you've ever had about the Ryan brothers. Bless these men....
State Hate: Which State Is Your State's Enemy?
Alabama: Mississippi...
Rex Ryan Waits In Airport, Wears All-Orange Sweatsuit
Rex Ryan went to the Orange Bowl to support his son Seth, who plays for Clemson. Someone spotted him after his trip, waiting at JFK's baggage claim, decked out in a full orange sweatsuit. He earned that "Sexy Rexy" nickname, dammit....
The Jets Find Out Rex Ryan Isn't Fired, Are Overcome With Joy
Football is a brutal sport that more often than not makes you feel kind of shitty for caring so much about it. But sometimes it produces moments that make you smile, like the one in this GIF. This is how Rex Ryan's players reacted when owner Woody Johnson told them that Ryan would be back to coach t...
The Best Version Of Every Important Christmas Song
NOTE: There are no country music versions on this list, because country music is terrible....