san Page 504 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Closer: The Curse Of Junipero Serra
Notes from a day in baseball:...
Santonio Holmes Already Becoming A Fine Replacement For Plaxico Burress
Former Ohio State receiver and Pittsburgh Steelers #1 draft pick Santonio Holmes was arrested in South Beach early Saturday morning, and unfortunately, it was not for masturbating in a public library. He's charged with disorderly conduct, and police say that he disrupted traffic and was verbally a...
At Last, Nash And Nowitzki, Together Again
While trying to find video of a time when Mavericks coach Avery Johnson's voice was deep — we imagine it just one day rising, like reverse puberty — we came across this apparent promotional video for the Mavs. "The Avery Bunch" are heading to the Western Conference Finals, where they will face the P...
Hasselhoff, Nowitzki Lead Mavs Past Spurs
Boy, man, is Mark Cuban's billion-dollar penis ever gonna come out and play tonight....
It's Western Conference March Madness
We know a few people, Midwesterners, mostly, sometimes with their own little biases, who claim to love college basketball but are left cold by the NBA. We don't understand this, but even they can't deny the beauty of tonight: Two games, both elimination, winners play each other in the conference fin...
Two Bald Guys, Ruling Everything
Pity the poor parents of anyone who might have been featured on ESPN's coverage of track and field yesterday; we imagine them readying to watch their dear child heave the shot put or hoist a javelin, years of support and pride and sweat finally being showcased on national television ... and then, ...
714, At Last
It's kind of a shame that this didn't happen while Will was blogging, because I'm not nearly as obsessed with this as he is, but... c'est la vie. Barry Bonds hit his 714th career home run, tying Babe Ruth for 2nd on the all-time list. It came against Brad Hasley of the Oakland A's in the second in...
And The Ones Get Sevens...
Screw "About Last Night!" After a night of basketball like that, it can be demoted to the two-spot......
It's Playoff Time! Everybody Grab A Ball!
Before we talk about last night's Clippers' win over the Suns, can we just say how disappointed we were that there wasn't a single incident of a grown man wounding the genitals of another grown man?...
Last Call For The Clips
The Cavaliers', uh, somewhat unexpected rattling-off of three consecutive wins over the Pistons has overshadowed what had been the plucky little engine that could of the postseason: The Clippers, who face elimination at the Staples Center tonight against the Suns....
Kobe Bryant's Dazzling Ensemble
Via YAYSports!, here's video of Kobe Bryant's appearance on TNT last night. We're not sure what much more we can add to Free Darko's live-blogging of the experience, except to marvel in that soon-to-be-infamous blue sweater vest thing. As one reader emailed us last night, "Jesus, he looks like Rapey...
Wait ... They're Not Still Playing?
Last night's Clippers-Suns game was so intense, so all-inclusive, that we were this close to just live blogging the thing ourselves. (J.E. Skeets did just fine, anyway.) The game ended at 2:18 ET time, which was seven hours ago; a guy who clocked in to work when this game ended still has an hour l...
Chris Kaman And Clippers Ready For World Domination
Little known fact: Clippers center Chris Kaman is not, in fact, actually hurt: That lump on his shoulder is just a normal byproduct of reaching the 25th year of life on his home planet. It's kind of like a birthing pouch, actually; in nine months, a being resembling a cross between Nicko McBrain a...
Somehow ... The Series Is TIED?
As we wait for Mark Cuban to sleep off what is almost certainly an enormous (and well-earned) hangover, we turn our morning attentions to LeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers. (No offense to the Mavericks, of course; we are one step closer to the sublime possibility of David Stern handing the ...
Hey, These Playoffs Are Getting Kind Of Fun
If you're one of those cynical souls who doesn't take Rasheed Wallace's word as gospel, we should be in for quite an intriguing evening of basketball. In the first game, we get to find out if this will be a forgettable early chapter in LeBron James' playoff career or if becomes something unique, spe...
Hail The Glorious, Conquering Clippers
It's pretty clear at this point that the Suns should continue to only play teams from Los Angeles; this Suns-Clippers series is shaping up to be as entertaining as the Suns-Lakers series was....
Elgin Baylor, NBA Exec Of The Year. This Year, They Mean.
This has to be considered one of the biggest upsets in sports history. If, one year ago, you'd have suggested that it was even possible for Clippers GM Elgin Baylor to one day be considered for the NBA's Executive of the Year award, Jerry West and Joe Dumars would've shown up at your door to take ...
And Here's Your Rick Sutcliffe Video
We asked for it, and you provided it: The complete video of Rick Sutcliffe's drunken meltdown on the Padres' telecast Wednesday night. Whoever posted the video was kind enough, in the middle of the video, to give us closeups of the announcers' faces, particularly play-by-play man Matt Vasgersian, wh...
Rick Sutcliffe ... Bombed!
Earlier today, we wondered why Bill Murray was hanging out in San Diego while his Cubs were in San Francisco. We now have our answer: He was getting blasted with Rick Sutcliffe....