si Page 486 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Please Enjoy "The Joy Of Christmas," The Greatest, Goofiest Christmas Album Ever Made
Tastefulness. It has no place when celebrating the holiday season, but some people just can’t fucking help themselves. Look at this Spotify playlist:...
New World Chess Championship Logo Says, "Hey, Let's Fuck"
Have you heard? Chess fucks. And chess wants you all to know that it fucks, so it has graciously made it very clear in the logo for the upcoming 2018 World Chess Championship....
Are These Assists?
What with all the nice fat triple-doubly Ben Simmons and Lonzo Ball lines, you might be wondering what exactly makes an assist. I am. Not because I’m interested in whether home scorers are especially generous to their local stars—both players, it turns out, average more assists per 36 minutes when o...
Ben Simmons Is Still Not Shooting Jumpers
Playing without Joel Embiid tonight, Ben Simmons had 19 points, 12 rebounds and 10 assists. It was the fourth triple-double of his NBA career....
Here’s The Bullet Club Leading The Crowd At The ECW Arena In A Backstreet Boys Singalong
Ring of Honor held its annual Final Battle event on Friday night, and it caused a bit of internet drama. ...
Major League Baseball's Statcast Can Break Sabermetrics
“On a historical basis, a decade from now, we’ll be looking back saying, ‘That was the highest route efficiency that’s ever been captured in baseball.’”...
The Cardinals Recovered An Unintentional Onside Kick
Arizona’s Phil Dawson tried a chip-shot kick against Washington to start the second half, but all that usually does is prevent something really, really bad from happening against your own team. This time, however, with the receiving unit confused and the ball taking a weird hop, the Cards won a comp...
Indiana Knocks Off Notre Dame In Overtime Finish That Left Gus Johnson Hoarse
We’re used to Gus Johnson unleashing Gusgasms, but Indiana’s overtime comeback to beat Notre Dame that improved their season record to 6-5 and knocked off the 18th-ranked Irish took the Fox announcer to another level....
America's Wonderteen Delivers 89th-Minute Match-Winner For Dortmund
Borussia Dortmund claimed a 2-1 win over Hoffenheim today when Christian Pulisic juggled his way past Oliver Baumann in the 89th minute to score yet another game-winner for his side, keeping them in third place in the Bundesliga....
The NFL’s Concussion Protocol Can Work, But Only If It’s Enforced<em></em>
What you see above is Texans quarterback Tom Savage experiencing what’s known as the fencing response after getting his head slammed into the ground, as obvious a sign of a brain injury as there can be. His Sunday should have ended right then and there, and yet just a few minutes later, Savage retur...
How Steven Seagal Became A Useful Puppet For Post-Soviet Dictators
On a crisp November morning in Moscow, Steven Seagal found himself within the walls of the Grand Kremlin Palace, seated across from Vladimir Putin, the most powerful man in the Russian Federation. Dressed in a blood-red kimono and black trousers—a throwback to his days as a martial artist—Seagal obs...
This Andy Benoit Take About Russell Wilson Is So Fucking Stupid I Want To Die
You might remember Sports Illustrated’s resident tape-eater Andy Benoit from the time he proudly listed 15 backup stiffs better than Colin Kaepernick (and unironically included the likes of Brock Osweiler), or the time he said the Browns weren’t a joke because he watched the film on them, or the tim...
Joe Smith, Baseball's One True Joe Smith, To Sign With Astros
Much is made of the fact that baseball’s history makes the sport so rich in numbers—a statistic to back up every story and an analysis to run for every situation, as broadcasters and newspaper columnists and front office nerds alike will all remind you—but that baseball’s history makes the sport so ...
Soccer Player Crumples In Shame After Sending Penalty Kick Straight To The Moon
When standing over a late, potentially match-winning penalty against top-of-the-table opposition, as Zwolle captain Bram van Polen found himself in yesterday’s game against AZ Alkmaar, the last thing you want your resulting shot attempt to inspire in the crowd is an immediate wave of shocked horror....
"They're Not Gonna Keep 'Em Off The Field Tonight!"
Just go with it: ...
MLB Umpire Dale Scott Retires After Series Of Concussions
Longtime MLB umpire Dale Scott has decided to retire, citing a string of concussions in recent years and his fear that any more could lead to long-term health effects....
Here's The Only Hot Stove Glossary You'll Ever Need
Today marks the first full day of baseball’s Winter Meetings, that wonderful annual gathering in which baseball executives text each other trade proposals in closer physical proximity to one another than is usually the case while baseball writers repeatedly get drunk at the same hotel bar. This spec...
Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke Is Mad Because <i>Outside Magazine</i> Pointed Out He's A Fly Fishing Novice
One of the stupidest plans that the extremely stupid Trump administration is currently carrying out is a dramatic shrinking of Bears Ears National Monument in Utah. Trump recently announced that he would cut the size of Bears Ears by 85 percent and halved the size of the Grand Staircase-Escalante Na...
Tom Savage Continued To Play After Distressing Hit
Houston Texans quarterback Tom Savage returned to the field for a series after taking what looked like a truly damaging hit from the 49ers’ Elvis Dumervil. After getting knocked over in his own end zone, Savage stayed on the ground with his hands shaking before being helped up....
Savor The Mental Image Of Kevin Durant Hiding From An Enraged Boogie
Warriors director of team operations Eric Housen has a big job, behind the scenes, keeping Golden State’s basketball operation running smoothly. Lots of good stuff about Housen’s role in this New York Times story, read it for yourself, yes, yes, BRING ME THE STORY OF KEVIN DURANT FLEEING DEMARCUS CO...