si Page 488 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Is Alex Ovechkin DUN DUN DUN ... A Russian Agent?
Seeking to explain why Alex Ovechkin started the PutinTeam “social movement” earlier in the fall, a trio of Washington Post reporters went long on the Ovechkin-Putin bromance, and the genesis of Ovechkin’s PutinTeam launch. It’s a sprawling piece of work that explores both the origins and the effect...
Dwight Howard Fined $35,000 For Being Dwight Howard
Of all the dipshit ways for Dwight Howard to earn himself a $35,000 fine from the NBA, this is almost certainly the Dwight Howard-est:...
My Fellow Americans, I Regret To Inform You That Our Idiot President Is Being Owned Again
Yes, our dingus mingus of a President said something dumb and wrong, and once again he is being owned online for it. This time, in an effort to protect his image from the indignity of, umm, not being on the cover of one specific issue of one specific magazine, he made some shit up about “actually, I...
Ah Yes, These Are The Orlando Magic I Remember
I am very glad I didn’t say anything especially glowing about the Orlando Magic back on November 2, when they were “good,” before they remembered that they cannot truly be good, for they are the Orlando Magic. They almost fooled me!...
Washington's Shitty Turf Is Hurting The Team Again
It’s been almost four years since Washington’s slap-dick field cost them Robert Griffin III’s knee, and possibly career. Somehow, they are still letting things like happen:...
Nick Fitzgerald Leaves Egg Bowl With Horrible, Horrible, Horrible Injury
Tonight’s Egg Bowl between Ole Miss and Mississippi State started off ugly and got literally ugly as Bulldogs quarterback Nick Fitzgerald left the game on a cart after suffering a truly horrifying leg injury that left ESPN’s broadcast scrambling to cut away. ...
Cameraman Is SO MAD At Bus That Blocked View Of Georgia Dome Implosion
The Weather Channel was one of many outlets that aired this morning’s implosion of the Georgia Dome. The Weather Channel was the only outlet thats camera was set up in the exact wrong spot for this MARTA bus pull up at the exact wrong time to ruin the shot. After 40 minutes of unobstructed streaming...
Georgia Dome Blowed Up Real Good
It took only 25 years for the Georgia Dome to be deemed obsolete and replaced, and another 15 seconds for the whole thing to come down....
NBC Airs A Bizarre NFL Promo Featuring Lawrence Taylor
In 2010, former Giants linebacker Lawrence Taylor was charged with third-degree rape, patronizing a prostitute, sexual abuse, and endangering a child, after he had sex with a 16-year-old who’d been delivered to him against her will by a pimp, who’d punched her in the face in order to secure her comp...
Sioux Falls Goalie Makes The Most Of His Empty Netter Celebration
The proper celebration for an empty net goal is usually just a sigh of relief. It means a player did everything he was supposed to do, and now his team can relax and enjoy the inevitable win....
You're Playing Kansas, Dipshit
Baker Mayfield is an excellent football player. He also seems to enjoy grabbing his dick and telling hapless Kansas players to go fuck themselves:...
The NBA's One-And-Done Draft Rule Is Just Dumb Enough To Allow One More Prep-To-Pro Star
ESPN reported this week that Adam Silver and Michele Roberts are more open than ever to changing the NBA’s draft eligibility rules, which currently require American high school players to be a year removed from the graduation of their high school class by the time of the draft in order to be eligibl...
Country Musician Releases Bad Song About Telling His Ass To Take A Knee
Country musician Neal McCoy was so incensed by NFL players who took a knee during that national anthem that he performed a song called “Take A Knee My Ass.” It is a truly shameless cash grab and a lousy, maudlin song; it begins with him singing the first portion of the Pledge of Allegiance....
King Krule Will Be The Last Rock Star In The Universe
It’s a funny moment, when you’re a young person, and you come across an even younger person who is deeply, unambiguously, in every thinkable respect, cooler than you. Do you remember when this happened to you? It comes well before the body-wide, achy realization that you, as a fan of sports or music...
Boogie Cousins And The Pelicans Might Be Good, Definitely Are Great
DeMarcus Cousins is seven feet tall. He weighs, conservatively, 275 pounds. Here he is, doing pretty much all of the basketball stuff, in a single glorious ramshackle possession:...
Screencap Classix: November 16, 2014
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Who Is The Best Two-On-Two Team In The NBA?
Ben Simmons dropped 18 points, 9 rebounds, and 10 assists last night and quietly flew under the radar. That is because Joel Embiid is a monstrous gift: His 46 points, 15 rebounds, 7 blocks and 7 assists blacked out the sun. There was a gazelle-like Euro step, a double Dream Shake, and easy pullups f...
Artem Anisimov's Third-Period Hat Trick Was Just What The Blackhawks Needed
Artem Anisimov is in his ninth season in the NHL and he has, apparently, not been thinking about this moment. After scoring his first career hat trick, all in the third period and all crucial for a 6-3 Blackhawks win over the Rangers, the 29-year-old center was asked what he was going to do with the...
John Wall Has The Nutmegging Of The Night
There are 11 games on tonight’s NBA schedule, several of which have yet to begin and none of which is yet even into the second half, but I still feel quite confident proclaiming this John Wall masterpiece in transition as the nutmegging of the night, because goddamn this is good:...
Shot, Chaser: Morgan William And Mississippi State Are Planning Their Encore
It’s not that Mississippi State women’s basketball coach Vic Schaefer doesn’t have sufficient appreciation for The Shot. The floater that tiny Morgan William sank over the outstretched fingers of Connecticut’s Gabby Williams in last year’s NCAA Tournament gave the Bulldogs a 66-64 win, ended UConn’s...