si Page 866 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

High School Football Team Embarrass Selves For Your Viewing Pleasure
In the pantheon of humiliating sports-themed "Single Ladies" covers, this one is...at least top two. At least Decatur Central (Ind.) won $300 for their troubles. [Huffington Post]...

"Brawl For It All 2008"
For many of you, the day after Thanksgiving requires you to put on your best Gap sport coat, head out to the local beef-and-beer drink your way through a high school reunion. Sometimes, the outcomes are disastrous. Heed these warnings...

My Asian Roommate Stole My Handjob!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Unfortunately, Not Everyone Likes Lionel Messi
With his hilarious Monkees hair cut and preposterous skills, you'd think that everyone would adore Messi. Not so this tough guy Fonz impersonator. Ouch....

Gareth Bale Could Be As Good As Lionel Messi, Drools Brian Flynn
It's always a sign that you've made it as a footballer when an emotional European teenager makes a Youtube compilation dedicated to your finest moments, featuring either Nickelback, a defiant Eminem number, or something thrilling and operatic as the soundtrack....

Get In The Sports Fella's Live Chat And Cause Some Trouble
The Sports Fella's live-chat is happening right now, so try and slip a question by his zombie horde of screeners, gang....

This Marginal NFL Player Has Impregnated This Horrible Reality TV Monster Lady
File this under things we wish we didn't know, and wish we didn't care about. But Kroy Biermann has knocked up one of the Real Housewives Of Atlanta....

Isiah Thomas Is Still Delusional
On his sexual harassment lawsuit: ''[E]veryone else was found liable for contributing to a hostile work environment. I wasn't ordered to pay anything.'' [Sun-Times]...

The Award For Best Headline Of The Day
... goes to the Sun Herald of Biloxi-Gulfport for referring to the Southern Miss/Houston game as a "shootout" while noting, in the very first sentence, that three Golden Eagles were recovering from — drum roll please — gunshot wounds!...

Here's Video Of The Knockout Of The Year Getting Delivered In Atlantic City Last Night
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Here's Your Infelicitous Turn Of Phrase Of The Day
Ashley Fox, Philadelphia Inquirer: "Michael Vick once fought and electrocuted dogs. Now, as the Eagles' starting quarterback, he is the most electric player in the National Football League." [Inquirer, image via deviantART]...

“My Pussy Is Like Steel!” And Other Things You Hear During Sex
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Why The Fuck Are Your Stadium Lights On?
Reader Brian Mendonca sent us this photo of AT&T Park in San Francisco last night. "AT&T Park lit up like a Christmas tree. No sign of any events going on..."...

One "Worst Player In NFL History" Is Volcanically Pissed About Being A "Worst Player In NFL History"
Jeff Pearlman's massive list of football putridity has provoked an emotional reaction from Detroit Lions' safety, C.C. Brown, who was selected as the 90th worst player. He was not pleased with his ranking. In fact, he went completely berserk. ....

Lionel Messi Scores Another Rather Nice Goal
Just once, it'd be nice to see little Lionel Messi score a clumsy goal. Perhaps he could charge down a goal kick with his groin and miss it going into the net because he's too busy shouting sweet Jesus to the heavens....

Cranky Old Man Chides Everyone For Enjoying YouTube Clip
Frank Deford on that whimsical middle school trick play: "It wasn't genius at all; rather, it was a form of child abuse."...

Greg Oden's Shirt Is Far More Accurate Than He Realizes
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

You Tell Us: Who Are The Worst Players In NFL History?
Now that you've read Jeff Pearlman's two-parter on the NFL's worst players, head on over to #theworstever and share your own thoughts, lists, Rashaan Salaam memories, etc....

<em>College Jeopardy</em> Contestants Dazzle Viewers Yet Again With Sports Knowledge
Not knowing Tim Duncan is vaguely understandable, but field hockey? We know black and white photos aren't visually arresting sometimes, but c'mon, guys....

The Bottom 100: The Worst Players In NFL History (Part 2)
You’ve seen Part 1. Read on for the rest of the worst. Share your own list at #theworstever....