soccer Page 212 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Evil Colombian Lady Suspended Two Matches For Sucker-Punching American Treasure Abby Wambach
In the first half of Saturday’s 3-0 win over Colombia, Abby Wambach took a fist to the face from exquisitely named forward Lady Andrade. The refs missed it completely, and Wambach was sporting a black eye after the match....

Olympics Protect Their Sponsors By Covering Up Some White Seats At Old Trafford
Old Trafford, home of Manchester United, has been hosting some of the preliminary matches in Olympic soccer. That means the "Brand Exclusion Zone"—the desolate no-man's-land where only official sponsor's logos and products are allowed, and all others are physically barred—isn't limited to East Londo...

Singer Of Worst National Anthem Performance Ever Blames Vuvuzelas For Making Her Sing Off-Key
The parents of 11-year-old Harper Gruzins are defending their daughter's performance of "The Star-Spangled Banner" before Saturday's Galaxy-FC Dallas match, claiming critics who called it the worst national anthem performance ever are "mean and hateful."...

Here Is The Goal That Knocked Gold Medal Favorite Spain Out Of The London Olympics
On July 1 of this year, Spain drubbed Italy 4-0 to win Euro 2012 and many were talking about the team being the best ever. Less than a month later, this goal from Honduras—less than 10 minutes into the match—eliminated Spain from the Olympics. They will return home after group play concludes on We...

Hope Solo Slams Brandi Chastain For Disparaging Remarks
Brandi Chastain had some words for the U.S. Women's soccer team that did not sit well with goal keeper Hope Solo. Chastain criticized defender Rachel Buehler for giving the ball away, noting it was something Buehler would have to work on. Not too incendiary, but following the women's 3-0 victory o...

The Cats Are Fat And Happy
South Korea drew 0-0 with Mexico in an early but entertaining men's soccer match this morning, one with a result we think satisfied this fan—if only because it meant he could finally take that ridiculous thing off....

Major League Soccer Wants Nothing To Do With The Boy Scouts Anymore
Just days after the Boy Scouts of America confirmed it was still a haven for the ignorant, Major League Soccer announced that it will not renew its relationship with the badge-obsessed group before the ink could even dry on the agreement. The two organizations announced their relationship, termed an...

FIFA Can't Even Properly Ban Corrupt Executives
Let's make this clear: No one believes Mohammed bin Hammam, the FIFA executive committee member instrumental in bringing the 2022 World Cup to his native Qatar, didn't bribe people. It's still pretty much accepted that bin Hammam was the brains behind the envelopes full of cash handed out to represe...

Japan Made Its Women's Soccer Team Fly Economy, While Putting The Men In Business Class
Despite winning last year's World Cup, the Japanese women's national soccer team couldn't escape economy class on their Japan Airlines flight from Tokyo to Paris this week—despite the men's national team riding in business class....

English Soccer Having Another Dumb Racist Twitter Thing
When a student was jailed for racist tweets directed at Fabrice Muamba, it was an opportunity to discuss the British justice system and the perils of online anonymity. When John Terry was cleared of racially abusing Anton Ferdinand, it was an opportunity to quote a judge saying "cunt" about 72 times...

Drunken German Soccer Fans Cheer On Person Trying To Parallel Park Tiny Car
That parking spot is just big enough for a Fiat Citroen VTS, and to actually make it work is that much more challenging in front of a helpful group like this....

Did ESPN Really Make Up An Entire Interview With German Striker Lukas Podolski?
We can thank our friends at Awful Announcing for this latest head-scratcher from ESPN. Yesterday, ESPNSoccernet published an interview Nick Bidwell ostensibly had with Lukas Podolski, a German soccer player. As you can see, if you click the link, that article is no longer available....

What The Fuck Is Major League Soccer Sending Us?
Our fearless leader, Tommy Craggs, received this message in his inbox a few hours ago from an employee of Major League Soccer:...

John Terry Found Not Guilty Of Using "Fucking Black Cunt" In A Racial Sense
Go ahead, try out your lipreading: What does Chelsea's John Terry say to QPR's Anton Ferdinand in this video from back in October? If you see anything but "fucking black cunt," you're wrong, because that's totally what he said. He even cops to it....

Soccer Announcers Make Everything Better, Even Hockey
On an utterly sportsless evening, let's spend a few minutes reliving two that recently concluded their respective seasons: hockey and top-tier international soccer. To that end, some enterprising YouTube user synched up some 15 different hockey goals with relatively corresponding broadcast calls f...

Bristolmetrics: <i>ESPN</i> Navigates The Dark, Sportless Days Of Summer
When last we met, SportsCenter finally covered the Jerry Sandusky case, we found out if the Rose Bowl will stay on ESPN (it will), and Outside The Lines aired one of the year's most fantastic features. What would this week bring? ...

Hope Solo Failed A Drug Test
On June 15, the day before a USWNT friendly against World No. 2 Sweden, goalkeeper Hope Solo provided a urine sample that tested positive for Canrenone. Canrenone is not a PED, but rather a diuretic, and is sometimes used to flush the system, so it's a USADA banned substance....

Steve Zakuani Returns To Action 15 Months After Gruesome Injury, Embraces The Man Who Pulverized His Leg
Sounders winger Steve Zakuani wondered if he'd ever play soccer again in the months after a brutal sliding tackle from Colorado midfielder Brian Mullan in April 2011 snapped both lower bones in his right leg. (Here's video of that incident, for those of you with strong and empty stomachs.) More t...

Soccer Trophies Go Unclaimed After Tournament Ends In Shootout With Actual Guns
A Delaware soccer tournament came to a violent end Sunday after a shootout left one person dead and four others injured. Wilmington police claim shots fired between "multiple parties" led to havoc in the streets, with two of the alleged shooters in custody after wrecking their getaway car; both o...

A Rich History Of Games Played Without An Audience
The mid-Atlantic storms last weekend weren't severe enough to derail the AT&T National, but they were enough to keep fans away. All of 'em, actually, per the tournament's decree. So Stefan Fatsis, on this week's excerpt from Slate's Hang Up and Listen podcast, went looking for other great moments ...