st Page 2310 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

If Your New Commemorative Mets' Patch Doesn't Arrive In 30 Minutes, It's Free
Stephen Colbert reviews the new commemorative Mets' patch. "It's perfect. Notice the way the patch mirrors its fans, by not wanting to actually say it's for the Mets." [The 700 Level]...

Lawyer For Joba Chamberlain Impersonator Pleads For Mercy
"What's the crime in pretending to be someone?" Bardis asked. "I'm Mel Gibson; want to have a drink? He just goofed around because he kind of looks like the guy." [Deuce Of Davenport]...

Racist Chants From the Stands: Not Just For Spain Anymore
In case the earlier item about racist remarks on the radio isn't your thing, how about fans yelling monkey noises at a black high school basketball player?...

The AFC Championship Game As Imagined By An Eight-Year-Old Boy
Yes, this Pittsburgh Post-Gazette graphic sums up Sunday's AFC Championship game matchup perfectly (WTF?). Time to worry: That Raven looks totally unaffected by the deadly eye beams. [Best Week Ever]...

The Fat White Guy Cometh
Robert Lunn, a former defensive tackle for the University of Connecticut, has one thing he won't miss about playing college ball: The Piss Test. [Thoughts From A Fat White Guy]...

Site That Caters To Would-Be Philanderers Denied Prime Real Estate In Super Bowl Program
Nothing is better on Super Bowl weekend than a good piece of strange. The owners of AshleyMadison.com know this, but they're not allowed to sell their ad in the official XLIII program....

OK, We're Just Going To Say It: Isiah Thomas' Brother Peed On A Church
As if Isiah Thomas didn't have enough trouble: His brother, Preston, has been arrested for the worst crime yet: unzipping right in front of The Lord....

Taking A Closer Look At The Michael Irvin Gun Threat Story
Michael Irvin, a black pickup and a robbery averted by Cowboys small talk; the story that inspired a nation. But barely 48 hours into the news cycle, the thing is already showing leaks....

The Downside Of Doing Your Teacher
We've covered many, many instances of teacher/student-athlete fornication. The latest issue of Rolling Stone reveals that even though it seems like every teenage boy's fantasy, it can really fuck a kid up....

Stephen Malkmus Speaks About His Fantasy Basketball Super-Geekdom
"My wife gets pissed when I'm on the waiver wire or live scoring on the computer when I'm cooking dinner...but it's better than internet porn, right??? - especially during dinner!" [RotoWorld]...

Maybe Barry Bonds Wasn't Lying After All
A report posted on Yahoo Sports today contends that Barry Bonds may not have perjured himself in federal court, because the drugs he is accused of taking—and lying about—were not actually illegal....

Matt Sylvester Is The Road Warrior
Ohio State fans know Matt Sylvester as the feisty forward who hit the game-winning 3 that beat Illinois in 2005. Well, his likeness is now available to worship in mugshot form....

This Is A Lot More Creative Than One Of Those Boring Mayors' Bets
In addition to being the youngest mayor in Pittsburgh history, Luke Ravenstahl is a rabid Steelers fan. Put those two things together and you get this: A publicity stunt for the ages....

It's All Fun And Games Until Someone Falls Out A Window
This is not a road trip story you want to brag about. Two college assistants attending the American Football Coaches Association convention are in the hospital after they fell out a fourth-story hotel window....

Replica Philadelphia Eagles Field! (Batteries Not Included)
Replica of The Linc in your back yard? Why not? "Invite Tony Romo over so he can feel what it's like to be in the Eagles' end zone." [The 700 Level]...

Mudbugs vs. Ice Rays Is The Greatest Rivalry In Sports
If you've ever seen two hockey teams more itching to fight than the two squads in this video, well … find that video and send it to us....

Finish Your Anabolic Steroids Or There Will Be No Cartoons
Simply being hearty and cornfed is no longer enough of an edge for young Iowa athletes. Some dads feel that they've got to add a little something extra to their sons' morning Count Chocula....

The Red Sox Next Big Acquisition Will Be An Angry Cow
From pink hats to cowboy hats: The Red Sox marketing arm teams up with the Professional Bull Riders Association. [Fast Company]...

Michael Crabtree Decides He'd Like To Take The Chance He Won't Be Drafted By The Lions
Oh, if only Matt Millen were still the GM of the Detroit Lions, we'd know exactly where the Texas Tech wideout was headed next season. They can't pick him now can they? [AP]...

Scott Pioli Takes Over The Chiefs
The Patriots once untouchable VP of Personnel has signed on to be the next general manager of the Kansas City Chiefs. [National Football Post]...