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The Lady Who Yelled At Cops To Stop Beating, Tasing The Patriotic Pirates Fan Was Fined $1,000
Remember the clearly patriotic Pirates fan who got billy clubbed and Tased at PNC Park earlier this month? Of course you do, but here's a link to it anyway. Dude's name is Scott Ashley. He's 40, from Friendship, but isn't due in court until May 25 to face charges of harassment, public drunkenness,...

Here Are Some Strange Things NFL Prospects Have To Deal With
Like getting accused of being hungover for a scheduled interview! He was probably just really sick though. But the other guy, he's definitely a Ginger....

Your Dreams And Skulls Shall Be Ground Beneath The Treads Of PhillieBot
Last night April 19, 2011, at 8:11pm PDT, the Skynet system went online, at least according to the Terminator franchise. Skynet first becomes self-aware tomorrow, April 21, 2011....

Transgenders On Wheels
Tipster Mike writes in to alert us to the WFTDA's new policy on transgender athletes. Huh?...

Help Us Subvert MLB Video: Submit Your Highlights To Become The Official Team Deadspin
We're truly inspired by how many of you are interested in mocking the MLB video policy by reenacting its highlights each week. We've heard from volunteers from T-ball teams, high school teams, plenty of "beer-drinking softball teams," and one from a guy who isn't "allowed within 200 yards of a schoo...

Lionel Messi Smacks The Ball At Real Madrid Fans But Doesn’t Mean It. Honest.
Lionel Messi has always been seen as the exception to the rule that to be a proper good footballer you needed to be a bit of a 'orrible git. You needed to like head-butting people (Zidane), make well-late tackles (Scholes), be outrageously arrogant (CR7), shag prozzies (Wayne), or just do loads of...

We Need Youth Baseball Teams To Reenact MLB Highlights For Us Because MLB Hates Its Fans (And Probably Children, Too)
We've been playing a fun game with the MLB video team for the past few weeks. It goes something like this: We post a highlight video from a game; they promptly email us with an informal cease-and-desist note; we take down the video and complain about it. ...

UGA Recruits Rob UGA Locker Room On UGA Recruiting Visit
We love this story, and you might too depending on your feelings toward SEC football and certain programs. Three people have been arrested in connection with stolen property from the Georgia locker room, and police say the suspects are recruits. That sound you just heard was the exploding heads of t...

Colin Cowherd Will Have You Know His Script Can Get Worse By The Hour
Back in February, we brought you the Awful Pilot for Colin Cowherd's Awful TV Show. It was doubly awful. Read it here if you're so inclined....

Floyd Mayweather Accompanied 50 Cent To Fight Night At Foxwoods And All He Got Was Booed
Your morning roundup for April 17, the day burglars everywhere accept the fact that trying to rob 81-year-old stroke victim/Korean vet Bobby Smith means they'll get a piping-hot frying pan filled with potatoes across the head....

The Binder That Ties You To A Game
My junior year of college, my roommate Scot played Dr. J vs. Larry Bird on an Apple II, the game's original platform, always taking Bird. Scot had a Three Ring Binder. After each score he'd put down that boxy joystick… [Kotaku] ...

12 Of The Year's Punchiest Hockey Fights, Evaluated By A Boxing Writer
As far as I can tell, the main difference between boxing and hockey fights is that during a hockey fight, you're standing on ice. And sliding all over the place. Therefore it becomes important to hold your opponents in place with one hand to stabilize them before you can hit them. Other than that,...

This Uruguayan Striker Sets The Standard For The 360 Spin-Move Goal
Last night in Bolivia, Blooming and the Destroyers played their annual friendly, the Copa Fundacion de Santa Cruz. Blooming won the match 2-1, and this beautiful self-assisted spin-move goal from Uruguayan Diego Martinones was the game-winner. He nearly one-upped the Swedish kid's back-flip penalt...

Rio Ferdinand Is Cyberbullying Piers Morgan And His Moobs, For Some Reason
Cyberbullying is not funny. And it's certainly not funny when the former captain of England and the host of one of America's most influential talk shows [Deadspin editor's note: No.] start having a go at each other on Twitter....

The Sultan Of Twat: Babe Ruth's Swinging First Few Years With The Yankees
The following is excerpted from Weintraub's The House That Ruth Built, about Babe Ruth, the Yankees, and the 1923 baseball season....

A Guide To Augusta National, Courtesy Of A Pro Golfer's Yardage Book
Golf WRX presents a page-by-page view of Kevin Streelman's yardage book from the 2011 Masters. You know when you're watching golf, and you think, "How the hell did he decide to do that?" Here's some insight. [Golf WRX, H/T SponsoredbyV8]...

It Sure Looks Like Brian Wilson Had A Lovely Birthday In Scottsdale
Tipster Nick wrote in to share some inside information about the time last month when he met, and took pictures of, San Francisco Giants closer Brian Wilson. Or so he says....

Your Start Of The National Hockey League Playoffs Open Thread
So, the hockey season that actually matters is about to start, with the Phoenix Kai Oats visiting the Red Wings (Nos. 6 and 3 in the Western Conference respectively) and the Tampa Bay Lightning heading to Pittsburgh for some 4-versus-5 eastside action....

Stat and Swizz Team Up To Ruin "Go New York, Go New York, Go"
I mean, yeah, this is better than last year's uninspired Q-Tip offering, but is nothing sacred anymore?...

Here's Video Of A Clearly Patriotic Pirates Fan Getting Billy Clubbed And Tased
Writes tipster Adam B. of the video he dutifully sent over this morning, "This is rather unheard of for a Pirates game, usually because there's not enough people in the stadium to get arrested." This presumably occurred during last night's 6-4 Rockies win at PNC Park....