the Page 918 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Prep Schoolers Up In Arms Over Plebeian Reporter Pointing Out That Their Crappy Football Team Sucks
The Sidwell Friends football team has been outscored 373-43 this season. When Washington City Paper columnist Dave McKenna pointed that out, he learned that the school's tony pansies are way feistier on the Internet than they are on the field....
Is This The Machine Or An Imposter On The Tonight Show?
Click to view Brian Wilson took his routine to The Tonight Show last night and—among other things—introduced The Machine to the Jaywalking-loving audience (around the 3:30 mark). Either Pat Burrell gained weight, or we have a whole new mystery on our hands....
Knifepoint Cunnilingus And A Fishy Scent
I don't want to spoil the surprise, but I really think you should check this out....
How To Cover A Dog Sex Scandal: Just Another Day At Deadspin
Sometimes, we get stories that even we aren't sure what to do with. Here's a transcript of a discussion on how to package a story about a rugger with his dick in a dog's mouth. This is how your sausage gets made....
Colin Cowherd's Asinine John Wall Rant, With Video Accompaniment
On Tuesday, John Wall played his first home game as a Washington Wizard. During his introduction, he came out to "Teach Me How To Dougie" and performed the accompanying dance. Colin Cowherd was less than thrilled because Colin Cowherd is an asshole....
Cristiano Ronaldo’s Pathetic Dive Against AC Milan Last Night
This post, written by Richard Gilzene, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....
Breaking: Mick Foley Is In Our Office Right Now
That is all. [Jezebel]...
REVEALED: Pages From Jose Mourinho’s Match Tactics Book
Those of you who study Real Madrid manager Jose Mourinho closely will have noticed that, when he isn't chewing gum, yelling, or shooting smouldering looks at people, he likes to write a lot of stuff in his Real-branded notepad during matches....
Stories That Don't Suck: David Halberstam On Maurice Lucas And The Powers That Be Scared Shitless
Occasionally, we'll select stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that we urge you to read for one reason or another. Today: the late Maurice Lucas, menacing the whistle right out of a ref's mouth....
<em>Don Balon</em>’s List Of The 100 Best Young Soccer Players In The World
Don Balon is a Spanish football magazine with a good line in fate-tempting articles predicting the next generation of world superstars....
Tottenham’s Benoit Assou-Ekotto Rips Into "Dirty Prostitute Shagger" Rooney
Tottenham Hotspur defender Benoit Assou-Ekotto, best known for his laid-back, "couldn't give a f**k, tbh" approach to professional football, has laid into his Premier League peers, singling Wayne Rooney out for special attention as a "dirty prostitute shagger."...
Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater: Pape Sy
Welcome to Incongruous Athlete Mix-Tape Theater, the occasional feature wherein we examine fan-made video love letters to athletes and their wildly inappropriate soundtracks. It's been a while, but we're back with a doozy: Atlanta Hawks rookie Pape Sy set to some opera....
The Timing Of <em>The Daily Line</em>'s Cancellation Had Nothing To Do With Favre's Penis. Sort Of.
Sports Business Journal's John Ourand broke the news about the death of Versus's sports-yap vehicle "The Daily Line", where Jenn Sterger co-hosted. The cancellation of the show in light of the Favre-Sterger fap-flap seems suspicious. But it's not....
The John Wall Dance Makes An Appearance On <em>The Daily Show</em>
The John Wall Dance is one of my favorite things, probably because it's absurd and easy for white people to replicate. Unfortunately, Wall's debut came in a blowout loss yesterday in Orlando. Thursday threatened to be a John Wall Dance-less day. Until......
San Franciscans Continue To Smoke Weed Unabashedly In Front Of Texas Reporters
Through two games, this is easily the most interesting aspect of the World Series. H/T Kyle....
Cristiano Ronaldo’s New Nike Mercurial Vapours Look Awful
Stylish young man Cristiano Ronaldo proudly unveiled his horrific new safari-print football boots yesterday (click the pic for a closer look.)...
A Brief History Of <em>FIFA</em> And <em>Pro Evolution</em> Soccer
Following on from the unnecessary video game references in yesterday's posts, The Spoiler thought this was too good to be hidden away in the link dump....
For Those Of You Who Still Don't Think Pat Burrell Is The Gimp-Costumed "Machine"
Here's more proof: The Fightins got their hands on an old photo of Pat The Bat dressed in the gimp outfit seen in Brian Wilson's odd video. The story behind Burrell's get-up is predictably strange. Go read it. [The Fightins]...
What We Have Learned About Brian Wilson And The Machine (UPDATE)
Yesterday, we alerted you to our investigation into Brian Wilson's strange relationship with someone called The Machine. We have since received many leads about the identity of the Machine and just what it all means....